i have been married for more than 30years. and my suppose partner in life neglected his domestic responsibilities for more than 10years already. i want a divorce or annulment. POSSIBLE?
2007-09-12 12:28:22 · 10 answers · asked by pinky 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
anything is possible.
However, while it may be true your husband has neglected his "domestic responsibilities" for 10 years, but you have allowed him to do that for 10 years.
It's called "communication" and any sucessful relationship requires lots of it.
Of course you can get a divorce (no one would grant you an annulment after 30 years of marriage!) but have you actually tried to communicate your feelings?
All too often in our current society, we as a people seek to take the easy way out. Getting a divorce and hooking up with another man is the easy way out. Communicating with your husband of 30 years, and working on your issues and differences, which is essentially what you agreed to in your vows, takes effort, but that is what marriage is all about.
Have you talked to him about your needs?
What are his needs?
Have you seen a marriage counselor?
Unless you've answered yes to all of those questions you really haven't done your part to make this work.
What is your situation in the marriage? Do you both work or are you a housewife? If you're a housewife and he's the breadwinner, then the "domestic responsibilities" will largely fall to you, as that's the nature of your relationship.
Your questions largely centers around your being unhappy with your husband, which is one, probably central issue. However, you also reference falling out of love, and falling in love with another man.
You owe it to yourself, your husband, and the other man to work through your primary issue (your marriage) before you start another relationship with someone else as that will only end in failure if the two coincide. Plus right now, if you've been frustrated with your husband for 10 years, almost any other man, especially one who you only see fleetingly on the side, will look amazing, and give you a false sense of how they really are.
Deal with your relationship issues. If you exhaust all efforts to make it work, get an amicable divorce, take some time for yourself, and then and only then, put effort into a new relationship.
2007-09-12 12:33:20 · answer #1 · answered by whiskeyman510 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
People change. You can't help who you love and who you don't. Try to make yourself love someone you don't or try making yourself fall out of love with someone you do and see what I mean. If anyone can ever make a pill to cause that to happen, they will be the richest person in the world over night. Pinky, you just gotta make the best decisions for yourself as you are capable of doing at the time and be willing to face the consequences. Sometime we do good, sometimes we do not so good. Is it normal? What's normal? Some marriages don't make it 5 months, let alone 30 years. Long term marriages sometimes are kept together out of fear, insecurity, or just habit. They have been together so long, they are afraid to try something new. You have to figure out where your at and what's keeping you where your at. I sincerely hope you make the right decisions for you!
2007-09-12 12:53:57 · answer #2 · answered by Brad M 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are asking while in your fifites if it is possible to get a divorce? Where do you live? Do you clog on a porch in mountains and drink moonshine all day? Do you read at all? If you want a divorce get one. Annullment? ummmm try to convince someone of an annulment after thirty years....unless you were in a coma all that time (evidence leads me to believe you may have been) there is not a chance.
2007-09-12 12:37:03 · answer #3 · answered by theartisttwin 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all it doesn't matter how old you are you can fall out of love if your husband isn't given what you need in your marriage in order to stay happy and stay in love. you have been married 30 years and just decided this over night that you cant stay in this marriage any longer, Any thing is possible to fall in love with someone else if this person is kind and generous to you and has given you what has been missing from your marriage, you can divorce your husband but, are you sure this man feels the same way about you don't put all your eggs in one basket.
best of luck
2007-09-12 13:00:26 · answer #4 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can get a divorce when you want. It is easy to fall in love with someone else if your heart is left open, doesn't always work out though. Make sure it's what you really want to do. Make a list of pros and cons
2007-09-12 12:48:51 · answer #5 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I agree with Whiskeyman
2007-09-12 12:37:19 · answer #6 · answered by ARLENE H 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it's not normal; it's called ADULTERY.
Get out.
You heard me: GET OUT!
When I say "get out," I'm refering to your situation. Get out of those adulterous feelings you have.
Face it: You're old and jaded. Death will hit you soon. And if you die, you'd be tainted with mortal sin, which means you'd be condemned to an eternity in Hell. Therefore, get rid of your adulterous thoughts, you perverted woman!
2007-09-12 12:52:00 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
That's normal for a woman at any age. You're a late bloomer, s'all.
2007-09-12 12:44:18 · answer #8 · answered by Sarrafzedehkhoee 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Yes all you need is to file for divorce.
http://www.divorcelawyers.com
2007-09-12 12:51:41 · answer #9 · answered by Red Rose 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
awww....
2007-09-12 12:32:11 · answer #10 · answered by ms.trinuh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋