2007-09-12 08:31:22 · 10 answers · asked by biggshizawn 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i am in a relationship where i am not receiving anything that one would expect in a relationship i dont even have a ring. yet she breaks her neck to provide her friends with birthday gifts.....cards.dinners, one of her friends got an expensive baby seat for her new born. what have i ever gotten...well i got a gift from her using my credit card to buy it. what do you think.??
2007-09-12 08:34:08 · update #1
Maybe she knows you will understand when she skips over you. (taken for granted) , while the others on her gift list will never talk to her again.
I wouldn't measure your entire marriage on this issue....but I definitely know what you are feeling.
2007-09-12 08:41:35 · answer #1 · answered by ♫ Melody 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is obvious that she takes you for granted, whether she realizes it or not. It may not be your fault. Some people, once married, feel that now that they have bagged a partner that the person has become like furniture in their lives - they will just be there, no matter what.
You need to take back some respect from her. Maybe you haven't said enough about your wants and needs. You may want to say to her exactly what you have written here, that she puts a lot of effort into things for others but not you. You have to be careful to express this in a straightforward manner and not come across whiny, or she will not respect it.
The truth is, biologically, women are attracted to strength and confidence. It is the way their minds are wired. They are attracted to the feeling that certain behaviors give them. If a man is assertive (without being a bully or obnoxious) then a woman is more likely to find some attraction and give him respect. Can you imagine if James Bond acted like the Cowardly Lion from the Wizard of Oz? I don't think the character would have been as popular in the long run with females.
Tell her that you made a commitment to her as her life partner, which includes supporting her needs and desires, and that you show appreciation to her. Tell her you would appreciate the same in return.
The truth is that she may not even realize that she is doing this, or that she is hurting you. Sometimes people do things until they are told otherwise. If you haven't talked about it, then she may not know.
2007-09-12 15:49:55 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
The 1st question is, do you buy her gifts? if not, then dont expect any in return, if you do, then just talk to her about it, tell her it makes you feel bad. Hopefully she will be understanding, most women think a man should shower them with gifts, not the other way around, so if it bothers you just talk to her.
2007-09-12 15:38:55 · answer #3 · answered by Amy F 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I am going to remind you that you are lucky to have a wife. It could be worse... she could be buying gifts for another alpha male that you can't even compete with. Just get over it and let her be her own woman.
Jesus H!
2007-09-12 16:26:02 · answer #4 · answered by Hitheeeeer! 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You're not going to like this but hell, I annoy people because I'm good at it.
1) Stop whining
2) Buy your own damn gifts
3) Separate bank accounts
4) Move along and choose to be happy
2007-09-12 16:27:58 · answer #5 · answered by Pugilist 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
My first wife was exactly the same it was such a relief when we got divorced. I am now married to wonderful woman and we do nearly everything together.
2007-09-12 16:07:09 · answer #6 · answered by PokerPlayer 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Quit being a wanker!! So she didn't get you a gift big deal. What do you really want from her?? I think you just need a little attention.
2007-09-12 16:13:54 · answer #7 · answered by I got answers! 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
i think she sounds like my bf.. we have been together for 3 yrs.. not christmas from him .. not birthdays.. valentines.. etc.. but he gave his cousin 60 dollars and his cus wife 100 the second yr we were together for there birthday..
2007-09-12 19:54:54 · answer #8 · answered by vis 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Materialist are we? You must have a wonderful relationship to be placing monetary value upon it.
2007-09-12 15:52:13 · answer #9 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
yeah, she sounds like a taker and not a giver....she takes you for granted.
2007-09-12 16:20:36 · answer #10 · answered by Common_Sense2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋