You are financially ok and lets say not hurting, but not rich. Your Nieghbor is poor and barely making it. He asks you to loan him $100.00 to help pay his sons medical bill which you know he can't pay back. Your wife/girlfriend wants to go to the big concert which costs $75.00. She knows about the nieghbors situation but says NO firmly to loaning/giving him the money. What would you do?
2007-09-12 07:42:53 · 28 answers · asked by aswkingfish 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
If you are financially able to help this man, especially for such a small amount, I feel you should do so. It is not up to your wife/girlfriend unless it is her money you are taking. Even so, the act of kindness which would not phase you but would help so much to your neighbor will come back to bless you later on. If your neighbor was asking it for some ridiculous reason because they spent their money foolishly, then you would not be obligated to assist them, but considering you seem to know they are struggling financially and it is for his son's medical bill, it would be a really awesome thing to help him out. In the long run $100 dollars may be nothing to you, but it could be so much to him. I really do commend you if you help him out. Do not listen to your wife/girlfriend, go with what your instinct tells you to do, especially if it is your money. Good luck!
2007-09-12 07:50:57 · answer #1 · answered by Green-eyed Nikki 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would not loan the neighbor the money. I know it's sad but if you start doing that once, he'll ask you again. And again. There are government programs he should be looking into. He can contact his creditors and tell them his situation. There are things he can do. I would though make something up as to why you cannot loan the money. No need to make him feel bad. But once you loan the money, better look forward to him asking you for more. It's an easy fix for him. He's getting money for free from you. You aren't really helping him at all, technically. So go to the concert and let him down easy and know that there are things he can do (if he wants) to help his situation. I don't have insurance at all. I have tons of medical bills. I called them and told them I can pay XX amount of money. As long as you pay something, no matter how small, the place can't go after him because he's making a good faith effort. Even if he pays 5 bucks. So go to the concert.
2007-09-12 14:57:37 · answer #2 · answered by lazycat 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If this is a true situation, and your neighbor is really using the money for his son, I can't believe that you even have to make a choice. What ever happened to HELP THY NEIGHBOR? The world today is so affraid to help anyone out of compassion. You know up front he can't pay you back so don't call it a loan, call it a gift. Don't you ever give to charities? Just because this one doesn't have a big corporation running it doesn't make it any different. At least you'd know where it went. You may need help sometime in the future and your neighbor could be the only one that can give it to you. What would you want HIM to do then?
2007-09-12 15:05:19 · answer #3 · answered by Needtoknow 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are many variables in this situation that we don't know in order to make an informed opinion. Are the neighbors the type of people who take handouts all the time and don't do anything to help themselves? How many times in the past have you helped them out? Etc. Most importantly: is it a wife or is it a girlfriend? If it’s a girlfriend, there’s no reason she should be making your financial decisions. If it’s a wife, that’s different because you are supposed to be partners in all things including the finances.
Personally, If I believed they were hardworking people who tried to make ends meet but just needed help this time, I would pay the bill. Concerts come and go but the opportunity to lend a helping hand to someone truly in need is more important, imho.
2007-09-12 14:56:55 · answer #4 · answered by meagain 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You already now that you won't be getting the money back so that shouldn't be part of the issue, my question is why aren't the kids on insurance that would cover the bill, every state has low income insurance that only cost 20 dollars per month and there are no co-pays. With that said I would more than likely agree to "loan" my neighbor money(because I am that type of person) but I would request the bill and send in the check myself, that way I knew that it would be going where it was suppose to going.
2007-09-12 14:48:51 · answer #5 · answered by Angela F 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would say to your wife, that while she wants to go to a concert, your neighbor is in need and could use it a lot more than you guys could. A girlfriend has no say in the way you spend your money, since it has no ties to her. (My opinion) The only problem of being generous is; is it going to be taken advantage of? Did your wife say no because this is a never ending cycle of asking for money? Or is it that she is just being selfish.
As for me and my heart, I would give $100.00 and probably do some baking and take that over. I am a giver by nature.
2007-09-12 15:10:58 · answer #6 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it seems, I wouldn't loan a neighbor money. You can't be sure that he is being truthful. There will be other things come up for him in the future and if you loan him money once, he may ask again in the future.
What you can do is try to help him find assistance some other way. Do some research: will he qualify for medicaid, could churches or some other organization help him out etc..
What is the old saying something about it is better to teach a man to fish instead of just giving him a fish.
2007-09-12 14:50:13 · answer #7 · answered by wondermom 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Loan the money if it's yours to give. The world is tough sometimes, and the one of the only ways to make things better is by helping those less fortunate. Besides, what would feel better, knowing you've helped someone out in their time of need, or going to a concert for a few hours of entertainment?
2007-09-12 14:49:42 · answer #8 · answered by outlandsishlady 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well I think if it is your money then you should be able to help whoever you decide....like if the situation involves a girlfriend.. but if it is your joint account and you want to spend it then your wife has a say. Why not take some money from your paycheck and use it? I think even if your wife said no she would have to understand you used your money to help someone. Maybe go without a latte for a month? I think you are doing the right thing. It's not like it is 1million dollars. I think if you can afford to do it and you aren't hurting your family because of it...then you should.
2007-09-12 14:53:04 · answer #9 · answered by greyskymourning82 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If its a Dr's bill I wouldn't worry about it. They have hippa and some other financial aid stuff out there. The bill can even be paid when he gets his income tax. I know over here I had a hospital bill for my daughter for over $400 and I paid $10 a month to pay it off. They can't refuse a pmt.
How close are you to your neighbor, friend wise I mean? Have you lent him money before and did he pay you back in a reasonable time?
2007-09-12 14:50:03 · answer #10 · answered by kittykat 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋