What would you do if your husband confessed that he helped a female co-worker get a car because she had problems (credit, financial etc.). If your husband was supportive, loving and took care of you and the household would you divorce him if he had done this with this female co-worker? He did not pull monies from the account you all have but from his checking account.
2007-09-12 06:04:43 · 43 answers · asked by stergre1975 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
A good guy friend of mine is going through this and his marriage is on the rocks. His wife believes there is more to the story but according to my pal, he was only helping this woman out. He is on the brink of a nervous break down because he is about to loose his wife. As for the woman he co-sign on the car with, she is delinquent in paying the bill so now he has to pay or have a damaged credit report.
2007-09-12 06:06:19 · update #1
I would take the hubby to the cleaners in court, then laugh all the way to the bank and wish the two of them well..
2007-09-12 06:09:44 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Your friend is an IDIOT pure and simple. He is wrong on so many levels it's not even funny.
1) He did this behind his wife's back which is why she suspects something. If he had talked about it with her, maybe she wouldn't be so steamed right now.
2) You don't do something as MAJOR as co-signing for a car for "just a friend" - that's crap. Either he's majorly STUPID or he's gettin' some on the side.
3) ALL money should be considered theirs even if it wasn't in a joint account so he had absolutely no right to go behind his wife's back and do something like that!!!!
4) He's an idiot for thinking this woman would be reponsible and pay her car note on time. HELLLLLOOOOO.....she had such bad credit that she couldn't get a car on her own and was so desperate to get help from a friend? What part of that made him think she'd be responsible enough to pay for that car note?! Look, dude....sometimes, the BANK does know more about the person than you do and if the bank didn't think she could handle that responsibility, then why would YOU think she could?
In my opinion, this guy is a moron and gets everything that he deserves if his wife leaves him. If I was his wife, I would immediately take his name off of EVERYTHING (car, house, credit cards, etc) because I wouldn't want HIS crappy judgement to effect MY credit rating!!!!
2007-09-12 06:22:29 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust is one of the keystones to a successful marriage and by going behind his wifes back and helping out a co-worker, male or female, was wrong. This is something he should have discussed with his wife before making a decision! By being sneaky and not telling her, he only gives her reason to suspect there is more to his story than just being a swell guy! I know that I would never put my credit-worthiness on the line for a co-worker! Would I divorce him? It depends. If it was a one time thing and I truly loved him and thought there was a chance to work things out, then I would give my marriage that chance.
2007-09-12 06:12:09 · answer #3 · answered by squidsgirl97 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well what can you do the damage is done already. Why would you get a car for a co-worker is your credit not important at all to him. Also there has to be another sde to this story why would he do this for a co-worker why not a family member. Now that would be a different story. He should have discussed this with his wife first before making that decision.
2007-09-12 06:18:32 · answer #4 · answered by efwisocap 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is why even if married couples have seperate bank accounts they should still discuss financial matters. I wouldn't be upset that he wanted to help a friend female or male is what would upset me is now because he made a choice and obviously a bad one I and my family has to now suffer. This now puts a strain on his family's finances. I would believe my husband about them only being friends unless I had some other evidence otherwise. I would from now on tho make it clear how dumb it is to ever cosign for someone who is not your spouse or child. and would make it very clear if he ever cosigned for anything again i would so leave him. I mean I can see him loaning some money that way if its not payed back well u didnt really need it you will live but to cosign on something u cant afford and now your stuck and so is your family bad move real bad move. Tell him good luck and tell him to stop hideing stuff from his wife be open and ask for her opinion might of kept him from this trouble in the first place.
2007-09-12 06:15:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
OMG that was a dumb thing to do!!
First, he should have discussed it with his wife.
Then, IF it was ok with the wife, he can help.
Now, he should pay the car off and tell the other woman to get lost!!
I don't blame his wife for thinking that there is more to it than just helping out. I would too.
My husband would only do this to help out a friend of ours and talk with me first.
I seriously doubt that
2007-09-12 06:18:38 · answer #6 · answered by Amanda Y 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he messed up. Dr. Phil says if you can't do something in front of your loved one...... or without their knowledge then you know are in the wrong. He could have gone to his wife or better yet told the co-worker to try to get money from somebody esle. Preferably from a SINGLE man.
Women know exactly what they are doing all the time! As well as men do.
2007-09-12 06:35:38 · answer #7 · answered by dazednconfused 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have preached and preached on trust and faith in each other in a marriage.Now we see it all over again,why did the husband not talk to his wife about this before the loan?No wait until it all blows up then want us all to feel so sorry for him,that money is his wifes same as his,why was she not in on it?I also don't believe him when he says there is nothing going on,sorry.If my wife(I love her dearly)did that it would be adios amego.So she is doing the right thing ,I think.
2007-09-12 06:18:06 · answer #8 · answered by ronald m 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
omg. I don't know what I'd do........ but just to stick my 2 cents in, this marriage has major communication problems...and yes, he should be very afraid of losing his wife. He may not be having an affair, and maybe he was naive in thinking that he was helping his female colleague, but by not discussing this with his Wife shows a total disregard of respect and poor judgment on his behalf.
2007-09-12 06:42:17 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Unless my hubby was super-rich with a history of helping out everyone he came across ( which would indicate that there was likely nothing going on and simply the way he is), I would go through the roof mad. Co-signing a car note for some other woman. Come freakin on! He would be out!
2007-09-12 06:12:36 · answer #10 · answered by undone 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I think it's foolish for him to have entered into a financial agreement without having discussed it with his wife first. He's not the only one who will be hurt by the 'other woman' not paying her bill on time.
And, I too, would have second and third thoughts about whether or not there's more to the relationship than meets the eye. It would certainly make me question my relationship!
2007-09-12 06:09:21 · answer #11 · answered by Durga sings the classics 6 · 8⤊ 0⤋