VERy uncompatible. AND you have a cruch on another guy, and he soooo your type. The guy that you are with does nothing but scream at you and treat you like ****. The child even knows, and hands you tissues when he makes you cry!! What would you do? I will admit that I am scared to leave him!!
2007-09-12 05:13:37 · 54 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Don't stay together for the sake of your girl. It will be much better for her if you're not with this guy than for her to grow up watching mommy and daddy in a loveless relationship. It's best for your kid to grow up in a happy, loving home.
As for the other guy, don't act on it till you are out of this one. It's just the right thing to do.
2007-09-12 05:17:21 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 2⤋
To tell you the truth I'm married to guy that every little thing bugs him but he also has a good side to him thats the only reason I'm holding on and no I don't have any kids with him. If things are really that bad and even your little girl is realizing it then the enviorment is unhealthy for you and her. I think if you are afraid to tell him that you want to leave him the best thing for you is to tell him is that you need a time out that you need space and that he needs it too. That way it won't take him by surprize let him get used to the idea of being alone and then when you tell him that you don't want to continue the relationship anymore he might face it and eventually accept it. If you are really miserable its time to take action a step by step action if the relationship is bad now what will happen in a couple of years from now?Could you be able to stand it? But do not rush into a new relationship you need time to clear your mind and to get to know this guy better.First impressions could be missleading and you could find yourself in a much worse situation and you need to think about your little girl. Don't rush into another relationship for all the wrong reasons just give it time to see him for what he truly is if he's worth it or not to avoid making the same mistakes.Good luck
2007-09-12 05:31:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You do the adult thing and pick up your child and leave. This environment is not healthy for you and it is certainly not healty for the child. A two-year-old should not be having to comfort Mommy through abuse.
Even if you have to leave with just the clothes on your back and go to a women's shelter, it is better than what you have now. They will help you get your things, get on the right track, and get out of this nightmare.
As for the other man, well...until you have dealt with the situation you are now in you have no business bringing him into the mix. If your man is volatile now this would just make him moreso.
If you don't know where the local women's shelter is, contact your local YWCA. They usually are associate with one.
If you have family around, you need to tell them what's going on and ask for help. Just take the kid and get out. When you have your head on straight and you are safe THEN you can contact the new guy and explore the possibilites.
2007-09-12 05:29:12 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would have to say cut your loses. Wouldn't it be better to separate and get along rather than to stay with someone who treats you badly and disrespects you? Then, you have to consider how the child feels, and trust and believe if mommy is sad, so is the child and that is no good for anyone. Life is far too short to have it be complicated by a relationship you are not happy in, your stress level must be through the roof! As far as having a crush on another guy, maybe you should just focus on getting out of this relationship before starting something knew, not to rain on your parade because who says you and your crush can't be cool, and be friends, especially if he is a good guy and you have a lot in common. You need something positive in your life, so keep your crush in your corner, never know what the future may have in store for you. As far as this other loser is concerned, don't let it get the best of you, do what you need to in order for you and your child to be happy. If he wants to be miserable and cause trouble, let him make someone else's life hell, why does it have to be you just because you have a child together.
2007-09-12 05:27:17 · answer #4 · answered by Sweetie 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You have to be true to your feelings. However, you also have to be responsible for the fact that you had a child with this incompatible man. You must think about what is best for the child. Now, because the first man abuses you, you should certainly get out; however, you should attempt to get custody of the child. Before you run off with this other guy and leave the father, you should find out if this other guy likes your child. However, there is no question that you should leave the first man not only for you sake but for the child's as well.
2007-09-12 05:21:28 · answer #5 · answered by SuziChi 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Forget the part about having a crush on another guy. That is something to concern yourself with AFTER you get your life back on track. If you are afraid of this man then find somewhere safe to go with your child. Get your emotions in order and decide what it is you want in your future for you and your child. If you give in to temptation and try to have a new relationship with anyone else while you are trying to get your life in order you will only end up back where you started--in a life where you are dependent on someone else. Be your own person first and then look for love. That is the way to go if you want long lasting happiness. You will be in a relationship for the sake of the relationship, not for the sake of feeling rescued.
2007-09-12 05:26:40 · answer #6 · answered by onebigfool 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I think at this point you shouldn't be seeking a way to use this other guy in the picture to leave the situation your in....You also shouldn't be putting your child in the middle where he/or she sees what you are going through....I understand you may feel fearful but, our only weakness are the ones we show...You should seek some kind of outside help either from a friend or family member or even the proper authorities...You should never be a vitcim to another person especially to your child's father....The first step is always the hardest but, you should be focusing on trying to get away from this kind of situation...I hope only the best for you and your child....You'll find someone decent and worthy of you one day but, this is not the one for you***
2007-09-12 05:33:47 · answer #7 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i'm only twenty years old, my advice is that if you are having feelings for someone else go for it, about the person your with if he doesn't treat you right the leave him or he threating you? just remmember when you don't love some one no more why lie to him you have a child with himif that child c's that his always treating you bad the person that you're hurting the most is your child. my suggestion is to leave this person if he doesn't appreciate what a woman really is. and remember never be afraid of a men if he ever does anything to you just call cops problem fixed.
Wish You Good Luck
2007-09-12 05:32:25 · answer #8 · answered by Jsus 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow, did this just start? You choose to have a child with this man and now you are showing this child that this type of behavior is OK.
You need to take your child and move out. Do not get involved with any men for at least one year. Take the time to be with your child as you should be. Learn about yourself. Become self sufficient. You need to get some self respect back.
It is time for you to step up to the plate and be a parent. All of this drama is not good for anyone especially a child.
Do the right thing.
2007-09-12 05:32:40 · answer #9 · answered by Tadpoler 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to get away from this guy and I know that you said that you are scared to leave him. You need to start making plans to find somewhere else to go to. It can be done because I use to live like that but I was married to the man who had treated me bad. If you are wanting to do something bad enough then you can and will find a way. Do not let the man intimidate you into being scared for you life. I was terrified of my ex and I was finally able to get divorced. If you can then find yourself a shelter to go to. They should be listed in your phone book. The women at the shelter will give you encouragement.
2007-09-12 05:24:15 · answer #10 · answered by Nancy M 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ask for a law enforcement officer to be present when you pack your bags and leave if you are scared. If necessary get a restraining order and a doberman; not necessarily in that order. Get a good attorney and make sure you receive child support; he wanted to play house so now let him pay the fiddler. Move on with your life instead of whining about it.
2007-09-12 05:56:44 · answer #11 · answered by acmeraven 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋