My brother's friend, sara is married and has two tenn children. Sara loves her husband; however she does not feel that she is a connection with her husband. A family friend, Tim. whose profession is a radiologist or doctor, has found interest in Sara and sara has found interest in Tim. Sara and Tim love each other, but Sara does not want to hurt her husband. She is lost, confused, and disoriented. This is a kept secret and no one knows about it. Tim continously tell sara that he loves her and that he has found his soul mate even though sara is a married woman. Sara shows feeling for Tim, yet she does not want to hurt her husband, children, and friends. PLEASE...anyone have any suggestions on what Sara should do? Should Sara tell her husband or keep it a secret forever. Sara KNOWS that she and Tim can never be together...please any suggestions on what she should do?
2007-09-11 17:29:34 · 18 answers · asked by imagination_inevitable 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
two children...not "tenn"
2007-09-11 17:30:11 · update #1
How can she feel any connection with her husband when all she can think about is her tom. Tom needs to found himself a girlfriend one who isn't married. It kills me to here how other justify their behavior. Bottom line she is a married woman with 2 little kids who need their family and mother together.
2007-09-11 18:06:00 · answer #1 · answered by Teenie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is already hurting her husband by having feelings for this man. If she truly loves her husband she should break the relationship off and just remain friends. I would say she should follow her heart, but her heart is taken by someone else and that is her husband. Whether she hurt her husband by telling him or not she will hurt her kids more, and they are hurting even though they do not know. It will be hard but she have she has to see where her marriage will go and if there is something there to hold on to besides the kids. She made a vow in front of God and witnesses and if she breaks this vow she may regret her decision and it may not work out with this other man. Tell her that she should stay and make it work and talk to her husband about their marriage and how they need to rekindle and bring the spark back without telling him about the other man. And if still she feel the same way then and only then she should let it go and see what happens. I hope that what ever decision that she makes that she does not go into it blind and make a mistake because once she leaves they may not be a turning back.
2007-09-11 17:45:19 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sara ahould grow up. This isn't High School, this is life. she has 2 kids and she needs to realize that they come first... not fantasy.
Tim should also relize that Sara has a life and make one of his own... They need to be adults about this situation... neither one can decide to be together, then give both up... stay away from each other and move on in their lives... Or come clean and let everyone know the truth... Someone will find out eventually, then what... DIVORCE///
2007-09-11 18:35:46 · answer #3 · answered by Petunia 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well for starters, not have an emotional affair with another man! She is betraying her husband by carrying on and not communicating this to him. If its over, she should respect her husband enough to be honest. All that glitters, isn't gold - so just because it looks good doesn't mean it is what she wants or needs. If you keep chasing ranbows, you will never find the real gold in the end. Vows aren't meant to be broken, and Sara already has broken them by not "forsaking all others" or loving her husband in good times and bad. She needs to decide what type of person SHE is and what values she wants to teach her kids. She also should expect them to have opinions, feelings, and should make her decisions considering their wellbeing too. Its not all about Sara, so she needs to open her eyes before she hurts everyone involved. Come on girl! You're a mom and wife, doesn't that mean anything?
2007-09-11 17:37:20 · answer #4 · answered by Sweetness 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sara needs to quite hanging around Tim or there is no hope for her marriage. Run Sarah, run far away from Mr. Tim
2007-09-11 18:16:46 · answer #5 · answered by pussycat 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She needs to get rid of Tim and see if she can work it out with her husband. If she can't work it out with the husband, she should still stay away from Tim and work on herself while she goes through the divorce. Tim is a jerk for chasing a married woman and her feelings for him are more of a result of her poor relationship with her husband than how great Tim is.
2007-09-11 17:36:50 · answer #6 · answered by Needs to go to bed 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You didn't say how long she has been married,
but maybe she's been married long enough to feel bored or unappreciated by her husband and
the other man is somehow gaining her interest by making her feel special in some way. If she knows they can never be together then shouldn't she just walk away and not destory a marriage?
2007-09-11 17:42:00 · answer #7 · answered by frustrated 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I do not think that she should tell her husband,I also would not stop seeing this guy if that is who is making her happy right now just tell her to keep in mind the fact that she is still married and that her husband must always come first, but there is nothing wrong with her being happy. Tell to not disillusion herself with thinking there could ever be a future with this other guy,because he will never trust her because of the way she is doing her husband now,just tell her to enjoy this while she can.We only live once so make the best of it.
2007-09-11 17:41:29 · answer #8 · answered by Talithea H 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Sara needs to resolve her issues with her husband one way or the other BEFORE she can effectively carry on a healthy relationship with anybody else.
She won't be able to help her marriage by turning to someone outside of the marriage.
If she doesn't want to stay married to her current husband then she needs to be honest with herself & her husband & end it.
She may not want to hurt her husband, but she already has by lying to him & cheating with another man.
2007-09-11 17:41:52 · answer #9 · answered by No More 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If sarah hasn't done anything up to this point that is disloyal to her family then she should just let it be her past end it now and decide what she really wants. Then if she decides she is not happy and wants to move on as a single woman and mother she should be honest with her family but,it is not fair to hurt someone just because you want your cake and eat it too!Anyway sarah decides to handle the situation someone will be hurt so she should make a decision and end the deception!
2007-09-11 17:41:20 · answer #10 · answered by jackson51 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋