she says that she does love me , but she needs time to learn and trust me completely.we been married for 2 years and have two kids. Does she have to trust me completely or am i wrong in telling her that if she doesn't that i will divorce her
2007-09-11 17:07:57 · 14 answers · asked by hope is never lost 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
So, she's saying she need to learn how to trust you completely? Have you cheated on her? Done anything that will make her lost trust in you? What about her... Did something happen to her earlier in life that makes her not trust people completely. Maybe not just people but, maybe men? did her dad leave her? I think there's something that has happen to her and she just needs more time believe that you won't screw her over like maybe someone else did. But, if she felt that way she would've never married you and had kids if she couldn't trust you 100% percent. ask her what's wrong what is keeping her from trusting you.
2007-09-11 17:19:32 · answer #1 · answered by nomoretears4uboo 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, I'm dealing with a similar situation. A close friend I'm living with wants to have an open relationship. He's still not home and its 12:14 am and I have no idea where he is. Its kinda upsetting but I'm not sure what to do.
Then I think to myself. If I build the relationship on trust, he'd be morewilling to share things with me and leave less to my imagination. Trust involves security, knowing that you can consistently rely on the other and telling your wife that if she doesn't trust you then you will divorce her just feeds into her insecurities and gives her more reason not to trust you. Does that make sence?
Have pity on the children, my background was messed up due to the divorce. Two kids in two years of marriage, are you frum?
2007-09-11 17:17:15 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like she has good reason not to trust you,any husband that would divorce his wife just because she doesn't trust him something is wrong somewhere and i think that somewhere is with you. You can't love your wife and turn around and want a divorce because of something as stupid as not trusting you give me a brake. You do know you sound as guilty as hell and i think you cheated on her and your just mad that she can't get over it in a week. You don't sound like a very nice man let alone a good husband.She is the one that needs to divorce you and find someone that will love her and treat her with respect.
2007-09-11 17:23:00 · answer #3 · answered by Teenie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You married her for better or for worse, right? We all carry doubt, and worry, we have trust and respect issues, but that certainly doesn't mean one divorce over it. A couple needs to get through these times. Did you do something to lose that trust? Its common sense that you would have to earn it back, don't you think?
2007-09-11 17:20:15 · answer #4 · answered by ellen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh sure.. threaten divorce.. that will really make her comfortable!! I can see why she's insecure. Insensitivity is certainly the keyword here. Did you eat a bowl of stupid for dinner? YEAH.. threaten divorce... especially with two kids!! Holy God.. she should trust you.. Sorry, but I don't think you'd find your way out of a box let alone the marriage.
2007-09-11 17:15:59 · answer #5 · answered by mosaic 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Does she have ANY reason not to trust you? Have you cheated on her? You have to find out what her reasons are for her to feel this way, have the feelings she does NOT to trust you. IF she has NO reasons NOT to trust you, she definitely has a problem. I wld. suggest she get professional help if she has no founded reasons for feeling as she does. Maybe there were issues you're unaware of in her past, in her family? There HAS to be a reason why she feels this way. If you're going to stay w/her & love her, get to the bottom & I wouldn't waste time doing it. Good luck to you w/this...
2007-09-11 17:16:41 · answer #6 · answered by Sue C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What's wrong with you-- THEN earn her trust silly!! Comfort her and do things to reassure her..why get mad over it-- obviously there's a lot of pain going on with both of you hurting, so do something to help instead of just giving up..do it for the kids ultimately.
2007-09-11 17:24:58 · answer #7 · answered by contessa 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You wife tell you she loves you but she doesn't trust you have you done anything to make her feel this way. you shouldn't divorce her just for this perhaps you can sit down and figure out why she feels this way before leaving her.
best of luck
2007-09-12 16:09:14 · answer #8 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Shouldn't the both of you have established this when you were dating?!
Umm...I tell you what. If we were married and you kept giving me that b.u.l.l.s.h.i.t ultimatum...I would be questioning my trust in you too. Quit being a whiny little B.I.T.C.H. Get your a.s.s. off the computer and start being a husband.
2007-09-11 17:14:49 · answer #9 · answered by ♥Beezy♪ 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You must have done something to make her distrust you. Once trust is broken, it takes a long time to re-establish it.
2007-09-11 17:12:47 · answer #10 · answered by G.V. 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋