Well, my nephew isn't, but this boy is a really mean kid. He is constantly calling my nephew 'f *****', and saying that he gives b.j.'s to other boys.I can't believe how this kid acts, and he is only 12 years old! My question is-do you think that this bully could be gay himself and is just angry and confused? That's what I kind of think, but I figured that I would ask you guys on here for your opinions. Thanks!
2007-09-11 16:41:07 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
At that age, it doesn't necessarily mean the kid's gay. He could just be cruel and uninformed. Either way, it amounts to harassment and your nephew doesn't have to put up with it. For one, his parents should speak to the school's principal immediately and let him/her know that the situation is not acceptable and that they expect the administration to step in.
For another, it might be worth it for your nephew's parents, if they believe that being gay is okay, to tell their son that what the bully is doing is wrong, not only because their son is not gay, but because it's not a nice way to treat anyone regardless of their orientation. Best of luck.
2007-09-11 16:48:59 · answer #1 · answered by kimpenn09 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm not a man and I doubt that a homophobic would answer your question honestly.
I have heard of a study they did with men who were homophobes and non-homophobic. A CERTAIN "BODY PART" was hooked up to a censor and they we shown both gay as straight pornography. They were verbally asked if they were aroused by what they saw, while the censures monitored there true feelings. The homophobes responded to both kinds of porn even though they verbally denied any arousal from the gay porn. I think this kind of helps to prove you theory about this other child. That maybe he is afraid of the feelings he is experiencing,so he goes over the top to hide them and it isn't accepted at home so he takes it out on someone else...or may be the kid is just a jerk, there are a lot out there.
Gay or not this boy doesn't have the right to hurt you nephews feelings, it sounds like old fashioned bullying to me, and something should be done to help your nephew, before it gets worse.
GOOD LUCK
2007-09-11 17:12:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
While it is possible that the bully is gay himself, it's unlikely.
Bullies are not very original, and swears and pejoratives actually age. Your nephew's bully has observed what people around him say and concluded that the particular words he is choosing to apply are those that are most scathing. In ten years, those words wont be the words bullies are choosing: Either because they will have become so desensitized that they no longer carry the same psychological shock, or because society will have improved enough to make such attacks on sexual orientation as inappropriate as the "N" word and as a result most children would not be hearing them and repeating them.
The bully most certainly is dealing with psychological issues and feels a need to lash out at other children, but again, it's unlikely that these issues have to do with sexual orientation. They lack self-esteem, and this usually is either from parents or other children (the "get bullied and become a bully yourself" scenario). Whether a bully will grow out of it or not depends on what sort of environment is fostered. Most eventually do by the time they're in high school. However, if your nephew continues to be bullied, he may develop serious psychological issues.
Are you your nephew's legal guardian? If so, contact the school and explain to them the situation. If you're not, make sure that his mother, father, or other legal guardian does the same. Most bullies respond to something as simple as being forced to talk to the principal and face their behavior, because their behavior is based on power games, and there is no way they can win in power against an adult of authority.
2007-09-11 17:01:53 · answer #3 · answered by timetravelboy 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Some people who pick on gays (or people they think are gay) do so in order to distance themselves from that lifestyle. It's possible this comes from a self-hatred of their own desires. I read a study where people who were considered homophobic were made to watch gay porn while readings were taken to determine their sexual responses. Turns out many of the homophobes became aroused by the sight of two guys together, despite the fact that they would describe being gay as sick and disgusting.
So I'd say it's possible this boy that's teasing your nephew is doing so to cover up his own insecurities. In my experience, straight people who are 100% comfortable with the sexuality tend to have no problem with gays. Even if a gay person hits on them, they would simple tell them that they're straight and not make a big deal over the incident like a homophobe would. I don't see why anyone who is comfortable with their sexuality would feel so threatened just because someone of the same sex asked them to dance or something.
2007-09-11 16:50:21 · answer #4 · answered by goldenrose82 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you are probably spot on with your thoughts about the bully being curious about boys.
That said, How do you know that your nephew isn't gay? I personally was gay at birth but my family didn't know until I was 17. I was giving guys oral sex from the time I was 6 but they didn't have a clue.
You may want to rethink that comment. If he DOES come out (and I'm not saying that he will), I hope you are understanding and supportive about it.
2007-09-12 04:04:44 · answer #5 · answered by ajwheat2 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Kids do and say as they see. He more than likely learned this behavior at home. My daughter went through something like this, a kid calling her a dyke. So I went to the principal and the little dork got suspended. I knew the kid and it was definitely something he learned at home. Maybe a trip to the Principals office wouldnt hurt. Saying things like that is considered sexual harassment in schools. Maybe I am going overboard, but that is what I would do. I imagine he has said it to others as well.
2007-09-11 17:18:37 · answer #6 · answered by Cheryl C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
howdy 0.5 guy 0.5 impressive why dont you get a existence as properly going around and giggling at peoples thoughts? Your 0.5 guy 0.5 dink you moron you too Gir whyndomt you in straightforward terms close up? What makes you so impressive in any case 0.5 guy 0.5 impressive? Anways i think of you're able to communicate over with the childs mothers and dads or in case your nephew is uncomfortable with that communicate over with the instructor in inner maximum or some thing yet make helpful he does not get into worry with the bullies
2016-10-10 10:21:12 · answer #7 · answered by rocio 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think he's just a bully. He insults others with comments that he thinks will bother them.
I wouldn't recommend he do this, but if your nephew said, "Yeah big boy, whip it out" that kid would never bother him again.
2007-09-11 16:44:29 · answer #8 · answered by Peter D 7 · 5⤊ 0⤋
Most people that have on gay are secretly gay themselves; this kid must have emotional issues if he is so anti gay at such a young age. Is he Ann Coulter’s son?? If he is just tell him he will go to hell.
2007-09-11 16:46:29 · answer #9 · answered by ray 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
This is about verbal abuse, not sexual orientation.
He has heard this stuff from other people and realized that it was an effective weapon, irrelevant to any actuality. It is important that your nephew understands this, and think of and react to it as violence, not sexual innuendo.
2007-09-11 16:44:59 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋