should i forgive her this time?

Question

I have been going out with this girl for about 10 months now, and last night i find out that she has been lying to me about who she is and what she does for a job entirely. she is very pretty and young.compared to me that i am older and divorced. she told me she is french-japanese, and working in finance. but last night i accidently bump into her email find out that she is chinese and university student. i really loved this girl and she really loved me. even my parents really liked her. she explain the reason she lying to me is worry that her nationality and being a student wont make us a chance to be together. the love we had for each other was reality. my parents ask me to kick her out, but i dont know if i should forgive her this time?

Answer 1

Don't trust her there is a whole lot more to her story then what she is telling you. If she loved you like she wants you to believe she would of told you the truth the first time you said you loved her.She wants something from you,she is one sneaky little girl so be very careful with what you decided. If you have money and your own place then that's the reason she is with you, if she is young and pretty like you say she is sorry but what is she doing with you.I'm not saying that to hurt you only for you to look at the situation from a different point of view.Listen to your parents they are wiser and they can see her through different eyes you cannot my friend love is blind remember that. I 've notice a lot of men are telling you to give her a chance she has her reasons for lying. Don't you think as a woman we would know a little more about the reasons she lied to you,you bet your sweet a s s we do and I'm telling you get red of her. I don't know why i really waste my time on some of these answers because you know and i know you are not going to do a thing about this you just wanted to hear someone tell you to give her a second chance and that is exactly what you are going to do. 1 year from now maybe less you wish to god you would have listened to your parents and us but it's your life to ruin as you see fit but in any case Good Luck !!

Answer 2

I've had experience in this before, she lied about her age and job. That aside, i feel that if the both of you truly love each other, you should find a real confortable and quiet spot to discuss this matter.

The main reason people behind people lying are:
- For fear the truth will not achieve their preferred result
- They are just fooling around

In your case, i believe the first reason should be it, so you should give her that sense of assurance that no matter what it is, the truth will be accepted and the both of you will work things out together. Avoid quarrels at all costs as that will only make matters worse, the fact that you bothered to ask for advise shows that she means something to you so don't throw it out of the window by losing your cool.

However, you should make clear that your relationship has to be as transparent as possible and the truth should be the only option.

On your part, you would also have to learn to be more receptive, listen with an open mind and think before you talk. We men sometimes lose our cool when "she works the buttons" and its really tough sometimes, but the best way is to let her feel that its ok to come back to you with the truth, no matter how bad it might be.

My best blessings to the both of you.

Answer 3

I think you have to make your own decision but I also think that if someone starts out lying then you won't trust that anything they ever tell you is real. I'm curious how you could be with someone 10 months and not know that they were a student? She must have had to do a lot of lying. If she had come to you and told you she had been lying then maybe I'd be saying give her a chance but you had to find out on your own. When did she plan on telling you? I think it's best to walk away.

Answer 4

Well, before you do anything, you need to ask her what other "lies" she has told,and you really shouldnt have involved family until you talked to her about everything. When you say "this time" what do you mean by that? What else has she done? She has opened up the conversation that is "ok, all cards on the table,is there anything else?" And tell her that if she holds something back and you find out about it later,that it will be over and now is her chance..I hope everything goes ok.. good luck to you..

Answer 5

How do you accidently bump into someone's email( your sneaky) I think if shes lying about little things like this she'll probably lie about big important things but people can change you should have a long talk with her and let her know how you feel.

Answer 6

You cant base a relationship on deception. Whatever her justification. The only way she will learn is to realize consequences for her actions. The only way you will be able to stand tall is to get up off the ground where you are being walked all over. Cheers Mat.

Answer 7

i say keep with her because everyone makes mistakes. and I'm sure that she liked u so much that she had to impress u! So i would give it another try and if she is lying about something else again then maybe u guys should just be friends!

Answer 8

Well,she already explained the reason to you.If you really love her,you will be with her;if not, you will use that excuse to finish the relationship.Think well and good.Good luck.

Answer 9

Buddy don't fall for it. she will always lie to you about something. and will come up with a reason or another why you will be the last to know stuff.

Answer 10

she's lying when there seems to be no reason to lie. she's probably working in a massage parlor.