pissed off?

Question

okay so heres the deal...
ive been married to a wonderful man for 4 years and love him with all my heart. we have a baby on the way in october and ive been really trying to not stress or blow up about things. so today while scrolling down on my caller id i noticed that his ex wife had his last name on the caller id and she has obvisly been using the last name to get things or just to be the b*tch she is. im mad because she still has his last name like she is still married to him even though they have been divorced for 7 years and she also is remarried and i guess i feel like she is still his wife because of seeing her with his last name. am i wrong for being so upset about this? and i so badly would like to report her to whatever i need to report her to but i dont know. can she get introble for using my husbands and i last name and if so what can be done and how would i go by taking care of this matter.if i wasnt pregnant i would beat the b*itch a*ss for acting like my husband is hers

Answer 1

She probably just never changed the phone bill, and if she has moved and is still using his last name it's just to get to you and probably so other people take her calls. Honestly, I wouldn't worry about it. It's your husbands job to ask her why she is still using his last name. Out of all things that could be happening, Her using his last name on the caller ID is not a big deal. I know I know it feels like a big deal. About all you can do is have your husband call the phone company and make sure he's not responsible for any of her phone bills because of this last name issue. Try really hard to let it go and just enjoy the fact you're going to have a baby!!!! Yeah!!

Answer 2

First and foremost...to "Julie H" who left an answer on here about the order of things...NO....the ex-wife does NOT come before the 2nd wife. What planet are you on? Unreal. Don't listen to that crap. You are his wife now and YOU come before the ex-wife. ALWAYS. You are married to your husband, the ex-wife is not any longer and should not figure into the equation in any shape, fashion or form except for a business-like co-parenting relationship if they have kids. Definition of separation / divorce - to live as single and unmarried...look it up Julie H...nowhere does it say "second wives come second after divorce of first marriage". The kids are very important and their needs should be put first...that I agree with. If the ex is remarried, I would think she would take her new husbands last name, but there is a possibility she may not have. As in any new mariage, you can chose to keep your maiden name or even hyphenate it, so this may apply to second marriages. I would ask your husband if he knows about it. I know it is emotionally upsetting. Talk to your husband and ask what he thinks and then figure out what to do. Yes, your hormones may be playing a small part, but that does not change how you are actually feeling right now...people should be more understanding of that. I hope you figure out why she kept your husbands last name...cause that doesn't make any sense if she is remarried. Good luck sweetie and hang in there!!

Answer 3

You have no legal grounds to force her to change her name. It's a free country....you can have whatever name you choose. Nor does a woman need to take the name of her husband when she remarries. I'd suggest there is more to your problem than her last name.....and it lies with you. You are WAY too jealous. Pregnant or not, if you have good sense you will drop this subject entirely and concentrate on making your marriage happy.

Answer 4

Not to sound insensitive, but you are probably already feeling uncomfortable and probably a bit moody because you are near the end of your pregnancy, but there is really nothing you can do. There is no law saying that she has to change her name to anything after a divorce.

As long as your husband doesn't act like she is still his wife, I wouldn't worry too much about it.

Answer 5

Is it your hormones or are you always this angry? What is the big deal. It is just a last name. He is yours now. He is married to you and is with YOU. It's such a stupid thing to be mad about. She was his wife before you were. You know that. So let her keep the name, so what. You have the man.

Answer 6

First, does he have kids with her? If so, he has every right to have her on his phone. This is what happens in second marriages. The lineup is:
1) His kids
2) His ex
3) His second wife
You should have understood that you are not going to come in first unless he has no kids with her. She can use her married name if she wants. It is up to her to change it back to her maiden name if she wants. The best thing you can do is just be nice to her. It isn't likely she wants him back anyway but you will escalate this whole thing if you open your mouth and act jealous. Be nice. Be her friend and she won't do anything to hurt you then.

Answer 7

it'd your hormones, believe me. been through that. she probably knows that it gets to you. and i don't think you can do anything about it. what you need to do is look at what you have and realise that he is with you and not the ex-wife. tell him how you feel and that it is probably silly thinking, he will make you see sense. get on with your life and take it easy in your condition. life is too short. be happy and enjoy life.

Answer 8

Don't give her the satisfaction of seeing you upset. Tell her new husband what she's up to. That should fix the problem.

Answer 9

There is a law that permits you to keep your ex's Last name,therefore ther is nothing you can do.

Answer 10

If the name was ever legally hers, she was entitled to keep it when she divorced.
It's not important and you need to stop obsessing about it..
go have some chocolate...