Nowadays many are staying together or living together but not married Why? Are they afraid of marriage?

Answer 1

Simple reason is that no one is going to ask them their marriage certificate to authenticate their relationship of husband & wife as no one is so much bothered what or who his or her neighbor is & having what relationship. Once they move about together in society every one recognizes them as married couple & treat them like that only. The question regarding legality of their relationship comes in question only in court cases or any legal or governmental works such as at the time of adding name of either in the passport as the spouse or adding either of their names as spouse in bank account or for nomination in insurance & even in such cases marriage certificate is ignored as a simple affidavit to be attested by a notary public does the whole job. In the eye of society both remain married couple & even if they bear child they give the child their surname at the time of his or birth or at the time of school admission, no one ask them to show their marriage certificate in any of these purposes too. They can always make a will of their individual properties/estate as they like to avoid any dispute after their death hence any inheritance disputes in future can always be avoided in such cases. Now why all this is done? Are they afraid of marriage? No, they are not afraid of marriage as they openly live as husband & wife in society. They are afraid of the legal hassles attached with the actual legal marriage. No person has so much time wasting in courts to get dissolution of marriage or settlement of any matrimonial dispute which take more them half their life time just to get one piece of paper i.e. the marriage certificate & to get another piece of paper i.e. the decree of divorce. These two papers work take half their life in one alliance, just what will happen if this is required more then one time in their life time, they will be just seen out side the Family courts, doing nothing but wasting their time & money on these issues only. The simple process of marriage registration may takes few days to months time in India & a simple divorce can take anytime from one year to 15 years or even more, this the irony of our whole legal system with regard to MARRIAGE & ITS RELATED DISPUTES. Well this is the true picture of India as far the judicial system is concerned. So in order to avoid all this many Indian people have started living together as husband & wife although not legally married. Hope now you understand this as you & me got married when the situation regarding marriage & its related disputes were not so prominent but nowadays the marital dispute starts from the next day of marriage between these youngsters & they either consult lawyers/advocate or start asking questions here in yahoo. Just tell me how many times you consulted any lawyer/advocate for any such marital dispute? Your answer will be never, because you both husband & wife had proper understanding & maturity to live peacefully as husband & wife. This cannot be said about these youngsters of today hence they believe in live in relationship although it is illegal in the eye of law.

Answer 2

Hey, I'm getting married on March 4th, it's going to be our fourth anniversary together. I got pregnant when I was fifteen and he was sixteen. You bet that dozens if not hundreds of people were saying that we would not last. We're still together, loving each other every day even more. It lasts if you make it last. I wish that I would have gotten married sooner, even before conceiving my daughter but we had to wait to our eighteenth birthday. Remember to establish a realistic budget. He's in the Marines which is a little frightening because military families usually don't last. Since you guys have been living together for almost a year I'm sure it's out of the way. Talk long term, what kind of childhood do you two want for the baby? How far apart do you want your children? Will you be going to a trade school, community college, or university? Will he be getting an education? How will you get help when he's overseas? Whether you are 16 or 36 having a husband in the Marines is not easy. Try to join a group with other women who are in the same situation. Infidelity is common among these families and so is abuse. Be careful. From the looks of things you really do trust him, just make sure to not be too dependent and focus on your future as well. Good luck! I hope you have a safe and easy labor.

Answer 3

Because it is a lot cheaper, easier and you still have the same bond between each other that a married couple does. The second you get married the state and federal governments are involved whether you like it or not. Would you feel any less connected to a person just because you didn't say those two little words to them and sign a piece of paper? That is why you see a lot of people having wedding ceremonies these days without making it a legal marriage. If it isn't filed with the courts then it isn't a legal marriage. So what if two people have to file seperate tax returns (and they don't even have to do that), or have to carry two seperate insurance plans. Most households are two income households nowadays anyway, so it is almost no harm no foul.

Answer 4

Marriage is a serious, but scarey thing. U could love a person, and want to be with them forever. But not trust u or them to actually live up to that promise. Forever is a long time. And when a divorce happens, there's a lot of emotional baggage that needs to be sorted out. When u live together, then u break, u can just leave. Just take ur stuff and go. But in marriage, it started out formal, and ends formal, usually with a lot of money leaving hands. There are many in dead end marriages, but scared to leave because they don't want to loose all their stuff that they've worked hard for. Then there'ssocial stigma that goes along with divorce. No one will help a woman with kids, especially if she's divorced, people wonder, y did her man leave her? Why would I want to raise another man's kids, and also marry someone who her previous man didn't want? But when u live together, u can hide ur past better when u break and hook up with another. It's just easier. It' also depends on what u live.

If u saw loving arrangements, then u'll be ok with marriage, but if u saw the opposite, u'll try to hold off marriage as long as possible. Life gives u different experiences, so that when u have the power to choose, u can.

Answer 5

It's to much hassle to end the relationship. Marriage wouldn't be an issue if the other person was worthy. Just because you love someone doesn't mean their "marriage material".

I lived with someone for seven years and would not marry him. Getting him to do everyday chores, that most men do with out even thinking, was a hassle. I would not marry someone that I was already miserable with. I felt trapped. If I went through with the marriage I knew the rest of my life would be hell. Living together meant that I could leave at any time. After seven years I had enough and left... I will never look back and I'm thankful I never walked down that road.

Answer 6

People live together now a days, because they want to know how the relationship works, because we come to know of the person in real life situations, people had to deal with issues of trust, and this can be one way.

For some marriage document is a commitment on an earthly level, One couple is living to gether for almost 8 years, and they said that thier love does not need a document on paper, their commitment is within them, their hearts have accepted them completely. There are couples who are married and fighting day in and day out. Marriage is what man wanted,he invented marriage for his real estate purpose. He wanted his blood line to inherit his estate hence he was the one who invented marriage. Man always want guarantee not the women.

Answer 7

I'm 30 and have been with my significant other since we were 16 yrs old. We have two beautiful girls 7yrs and 8 months old, we are not married, even tough i consider him my husband and he considers me his wife, we have talked about it, but never actually done it, we have seen so many of our friends get married and then divorced soon after, i truthfully dont think i need a paper to tell me that im commited to him or that he is committed to me, we know how much we love each other and that's the only achnowlodgement we need, We are not afraid of it, we just dont really wanted it, we are trully happy the way we are.

Answer 8

... No, not afraid of marriage, but of the in-laws... hahaha!!
Well, it´s a joke, but there is some truth in it... once you are married you are supposed to be a family member of your new family in law, and this can cause more problems than happiness...
But I think, that living together before marriage is a really good thing, as you get to know very well the person you are supposed to spend the rest of your life with and of course, you won’t make the mistake to marry somebody who is not compatible with you... right??
So, you can avoid a big disaster, which would make you miserable for the rest of your life or lead into divorce.
I have been living with my husband before marriage for almost 1 year... my family was shocked, but well, it’s my life, not theirs and as I didn’t live in India anymore, well, they couldn’t pressure us a lot.
I think, that it brings many benefits, you have the chance to choose well and you know, what your marriage will be like with that person, as the true character of somebody only shows in daily life.
But, as soon as there are children involved, I still think, that it would be better to marry, as it is better for the children. Many people say, that it’s just the same living together as an unmarried couple with their children in common... well, I suppose, that I am not that modern as them.

Answer 9

I don't think people have changed that much in the last 40 years. I do think that the stigma that used to be attached to unmarried couples living together is less than it used to be. And a lot more children are being raised in a one-parent household, and increasing acceptance of that takes away one of the primary reasons for marriage.

Answer 10

Ahhhhhh Ummmmm...... i can only guess....some don't want the financial burden or the stress burden either. Most couples weddings end up being quiet expensive and can cause alot of un-needed stress, and right from the get-go if U have that type of stress in ur relationship it can be quiet be bumpy & rocky. You have to admit marriage is costly for both parties, especially if it doesn't work out. It's only the Lawyers that benefit, I bet that most lawyers are muttering under there breath .....ha ha ha ha you losers $$$-cha-ching$$$

Hope this gives U some insight :o) take care..........

Answer 11

i guess the word marriage has carries a lot of emotional baggage with it... and as javed akhtar put it.... it has gathered a lot of cobwebs rolling down the mountain of time.... living together without it is really convenient for some... there is no obligation of staying there forever... no financial obligations... 2 people just live like 2 room mates living in the same house... apart from the fact that they are in love... they share the bills.... they share the rent... and there is transparency in things like financials... they dont take each other for granted.. which keeps the relationship young...
in short.. there is a lot less responsibility you have to take... you are free... marriage can be intimidating... and some people just like to keep things simple... yes u can say in a way they are afraid of marriage.... or there may b other reason... you cannot generalise...