I mean he is a wonderful husband and this is a planed preg. but its like ever time I go to the Doc. I'm alone, ever time I go shoping I'm alone, he doesn't even like to touch my stomach when the baby's moving. I mean am I in the wrong by feeling alone?
2007-09-11 05:30:28 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
My husband was like that. He went to the appointments, but its like I had to ask him five times.
He HATED to see or feel the baby move. He was a real asshead during my pregnancy.
'
BUT that was because he was scared by it all. Men show fear by acting like assheads. The SECOND our son was born my husband changed COMPLETELY.
I hated it and it made me feel like ****, and like he didnt and wouldnt love our child. I should have told him that, and you should too.
2007-09-11 05:38:03 · answer #1 · answered by amosunknown 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are definitely not in the wrong for feeling alone. Some guys just don't get into the whole doc. visits and shopping when it comes to getting ready for a new baby. I'm 9 mths. pregnant and my husband doesn't really get into touching my stomach to feel the baby move either and it made me feel like he wasn't as excited. But I'm sure once the baby is born that he'll be excited and hopefully help you out more...us women get more into every aspect of pregnancy just the way we're made. Good luck !!!
2007-09-11 13:08:57 · answer #2 · answered by baby_blue_eyes21_2000 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hope so. My husband dotes on other people's kids, but when it comes to this pregnancy he's kind of distant. We've had three losses and so going to the doctor with me stresses him out, because we've had so much bad news. He's also worried about stuff he can't control (but that guys think they can), like having enough money and how painful the birth will be for me (we've had complications). Even when he touches my belly, I can see the potential panic on his face, as though what if it's the last time he gets to do that? Chances are it's not personal at all, your husband is just scared about the unknown. Once the baby arrives, I think both our guys'll feel a bit better, having this tangible baby in their arms!
2007-09-11 12:54:06 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That's strange, being that it is a planned pregnancy why would he not want any part of it, talk to him about it, more then ever now is best time to have comfort and support in your life, no you're not in the wrong for feeling alone, my b/f talks to the baby, rubs my belly and hes the one suggesting all the shopping! It's definatley strange behaviour talk to him and let us know!!!
2007-09-11 13:22:58 · answer #4 · answered by ☆Leanne☆ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Aw, I'm sry. Tell him how you're feeling! Find something he's interested in. Some guys get freaked out by the thought of a little person inside you. Get him to open up about what he fears, what he's excited about, etc.
He may never want to be part of the shopping, I mean, it is still shopping, after all! But, getting him to tell you the parts he IS excited about will put your mind at ease.
Does he know how important it is to you that he goes to the Dr w/ you sometimes? Or did you just mention once, and wish in your head that it was important to him? B/c what's important to you may not be important to him.
2007-09-11 12:35:59 · answer #5 · answered by Dj 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mine didn't either and, frankly, I never asked him to come with me. He did come to the doctor's office when I had my ultrasounds (I did have to ask him to and he was really into that). Once he saw the baby, the whole thing became more real to him, but he still didn't get too into my pregnancy. I never felt alone, though. I knew he was fully supporting me and once the baby was born, he was very hands on. Give your hubby a break. Talk to him about what is going on and ask him to come with you sometimes. Maybe he thinks you don't need him with you for every little thing.
2007-09-11 12:49:00 · answer #6 · answered by Shelley L 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
is this the first baby? My husband was the same way. The baby just doesn't seem real to him yet. However, when our baby was born it was love at first sight for my hubby. I actualy had to remind him that I needed to hold the baby too!!! Now with #2 on the way he is much mor involved, we just had a co-ed shower and he has been to tour the hospital with me (dr appt are whilehe's at work, so all he could come for was the ultrasound)
2007-09-11 12:36:44 · answer #7 · answered by parental unit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband was like that earlier in my pregnancy..but then slowly I started talking to my baby in front of him...singing lullaby to the baby when he also start feeling it to be real and started talking to the baby...now he comes with me at every appointment & talks to the baby at least once in a day even if he is too busy...
I think that should work with you...give it a try...
2007-09-11 12:41:36 · answer #8 · answered by pamy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He may find it a little akward. Talk to him, tell him that his support means a lot. I always tease my bf when he's away for awhile, I'll say things like 'baby misses you' or I'll grab his hand and make him feel the baby. I keep him as involved as possible and I always ask for his opinion in names, baby clothes, or items. Even if he doesn't want to wait around while I shop. lol. Let him know how important this is.
2007-09-11 12:38:10 · answer #9 · answered by Darling 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i felt the same way. i went to almost all my appointments by myself...its hard. but after my kids were born my husband was the best with them. it may be just scaring him a little bit and hes not sure how to act. when you feel the baby kick grab his hand and put it on your stomach. maybe that will help him out a little.
2007-09-11 13:34:36 · answer #10 · answered by linney04 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Some men are weird about babies. Don't take it personally, but do talk to him that you both made the choice to have a baby and it will take both of you to get thru the pregnancy and beyond. You're gunna need support and he needs to be there for you.
2007-09-11 12:38:36 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋