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We had one son, and we always told ourselves we don't want anymore, because my son acted like little monsters. After past weekend my son play well with his cousins and they had a good them, so my husband now wants my son to have a sibling, while I still believe children are little monster. My husband's reason for wanting another is to just go get over reproction in our 30s and two of them is more fun, they'll play with one another. So should we have another one?

2007-09-10 17:17:43 · 15 answers · asked by 結縁 Heemei 5 in Pregnancy & Parenting Pregnancy

Mom of 3 is a racist, what make your children any better than mine. Both my husband and I have our Masters. If you not helping don't post.

2007-09-10 17:33:09 · update #1

15 answers

I hate to say this, but I agree with the person who said that you should refuse to have sex with your husband until you get back on BC pills and are on them long enough for them to be effective!

I think that as long as you don't WANT another child it is vitally important that you not have one. Every child deserves to have 2 parents who both wanted to have him/her. If you got pregnant and didn't want another child you would be angry and resentful towards him/her and it would be impossible for you to be a good parent to him.

I would really encourage you and your husband to work on how to communicate with each other so that you can come to mutually acceptable decisions.

About children being little monsters. All children start out being completely selfish and only want what they want. It is up to the parents to teach the child what is acceptable behavior and set up an effective system of rewarding acceptable behavior and giving consistent, negative consequenses that are meaningful to the child, for inappropriate behavior. It is best if you and your husband can come up with a plan that you both agree with. By doing this, you teach the child that it is in his/her interest to behave.

If you don't start doing that now, your child will become an even worse "monster" when he is older and especially when he is a teenager.

Some children are more difficult to do this with than others. Boys usually have more energy than girls and some children are born with stronger wills than others. I would strongly encourage you to get the book, " The Strong - Willed Child", by Dr. James Dobson.

Doctor Dobson is a psychologist that I have heard interviewed on TV often and have read numerous articles written by him. You know that I worked as a RN in psychiatry for 20 years. I have the higest regard for the knowledge and wisdom of Dr. Dobson.

He is not a Christian minister but he is a Christian and has a website, www.family.org. I hope that isn't a negative thing for you. I think that you will find many helpful resources for raising your son on this website as well as some helpful resources for your marriage. I found this website by doing a Yahoo search on "raising the strong willed child".

As you may have guessed from my answers to your questions, for some reason, I care deeply what happens to you and your family. My best wishes to the 3 of you.

2007-09-10 18:28:26 · answer #1 · answered by Smartassawhip 7 · 0 0

no longer a robust theory. The worst factor you're able to do is rigidity a toddler on somebody that does no longer desire it. it fairly is merciless to the toddler. you will purely reason a bad divorce, make somewhat some money for attorneys, and be purely yet another mom of a fatherless newborn. If is an order of magnitude greater powerful to blunders on the side of protection. He does no longer be searching for a vasectomy if he improve into no longer severe approximately no longer having a toddler. I did precisely what your hubby is doing whilst i improve into 21. I have no babies. I even have quite a few acquaintances that did the comparable. If he does no longer sense you would be a robust mom or that he would be a goof father then it extremely is his acceptable to do as he's doing. He does no longer desire your permission to get a vasectomy. in case you won't be in a position to attend to that then record for divorce, and marry somebody that desires babies.

2016-10-04 08:53:03 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

I would tell him to have the next one!!! If you don't want another child, then don't! It wouldn't be fair to you or the other child. You need to talk this out with him telling him how you feel. If he doesn't agree, you both should see a counselor before you end up with a house full of unwanted kids. Then what happens if he decides to leave you???? You better think, girl!

2007-09-10 17:28:14 · answer #3 · answered by puanani 5 · 4 0

If you have ANY doubts, Don't Do It!

Take control of the situation - Try another form of birth control that he can't get rid of. Look into Hormone Injections, which you get every three months to prevent ovulation.

2007-09-10 17:29:23 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 4 0

This is unacceptable... and I would be pissed off. Is he a GOD in your household, making all the decisions? I wouldn't have sex with him until he replaced my birth control and apologized for his sins. It sounds to me like you don't want to have another child right now... so don't. If you do and are miserable.... what will you do then? You might go nuts!

2007-09-10 17:26:18 · answer #5 · answered by Uhuru 3 · 3 0

i don't know what to tell ya darlin' me and mine have yet to have our first not to mention even think of a second one, i'd have a talk with your fella about the pills though tossing them before even bringing it up to you is a bit over the line more so since you'll be the one giving birth

2007-09-11 07:55:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0 0

Having another child is something you both have to want. Tell him you are the one who would have to give birth & if you don't want another one tell him so.

2007-09-10 18:50:29 · answer #7 · answered by Death Girl Am 6 · 0 0

i think you and your husband should talk about that seriously and decide whether or not you should have another child. Try to get into an agreement weighing the advantages and disadvantanges of having another addition to the family.

2007-09-10 17:24:18 · answer #8 · answered by sahlee 1 · 3 1

You don't seem like the type of woman that commands respect. But you seem confortable with that, so let your husband be who is, nod, smile & go make his dinner.

2007-09-10 18:51:58 · answer #9 · answered by NativeAtlantean 5 · 0 0

Tell him if he can get himself pregnant, you'll agree to having another child. Until then, I think it best you decline.

2007-09-10 17:26:10 · answer #10 · answered by gma 7 · 2 0

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