why would a 30 year old guy let his widowed grandmother pay all his bills, while he runs around?

Question

he runs the roads wi9th a 46 year woman who has a 15 year old daughter. his grandmother pays everything but child support. the grandson has a 5 year old daughter...any clues..anyone???? the grandmother takes up for him NO MATTER WHAT HE DOES...DRUGS..DRINKING ..WHATEVER...ANYONE

Answer 1

He is a putz and she is enabling his crappy behaviour.

You will not change this situation unless SHE changes her pattern of rescuing him at every disaster he creates.

Why would he change when he has everything he wants/needs coming from such a generous, and gullible, source.

I wish you the best in getting her to recognise this.

Answer 2

A 30 year old would let his Grandmother pay because this is the way he CAN do whatever he wants. The Grandmother must AGREE to do this, because she DOES. If she said NO I AM NOT paying anymore, the guy would be forced to pay his own bills, right???

Yes, the 30 year old is a totally irresponsible jerk, BUT, the Grandmother is not much smarter for allowing herself to be used that way.

Answer 3

Because he's a freeloader that has no ethics. And his grandmother is an enabler. Not an easy question if you're trying to find a way to fix it. It's almost impossible to get a freeloader to grow up - my brother is one, and is now 47! Hasn't worked in something like 20 years - just lets his wife work and takes money from our mom. (Yeah - she's an enabler, too)

Answer 4

Well, since you say he's working, then he has an income. Good.

Since Grandma can afford to support him and pay his bills, then she has enough to come up with a deposit on an apartment.

His dad needs to take him for a ride. They need to find an appropriate place for him to live. They need to find out when the place is available, and Dad needs to help him move on that date.

Really, it's his Mom, it's his Son, He needs to step up.

Also, if you don't like him dumping the child when he has her then you need to be very clear: She can come here, but you have to stay, too.

No just dropping her off and then you take off. That's not visitation. That's running away.

I'm assuming he had the capability to live on his own prior to the move. He just needs to do that again. So what if there's no cable or he has to live with a landline instead of a cell? Adults learn to make responsible choices. He needs to grow up.

Next time the cell phone bill comes have Grandma give it to Dad. Have Dad give it to Son, and tell son, "Quit mooching off my mother. I told her she Is Not to pay this."

It's one thing to help, it's a whole other thing when the Helpee is taking advantage.

Dad needs to step up. The ladies need to step out. You're not being mean, you're helping him become independent way way way too late. Do it anyway.

Answer 5

No question that grandma loves her irresponsible 30-year-old grandson, but that is the wrong kind of love because she is leading her grandson to a total failure in life. Grandma should stop enabling this guy.

Answer 6

Well, he's a lazy-a$$ I'd say. All he wants to do is party, which is kinda normal for most guys that age~me being one~but also, he probably has always relied on someone else to "take care of things". If I was granny, I'd tell him to freakin grow up and start taking care of himself. What a freakin' loser!!!!

Answer 7

Simple: because she keeps paying all his bills.
Out of love, she's doing him a huge disservice. He needs to grow up but she's allowing him not to grow up.

Answer 8

He probably does it because she is willing - and probably has been willing for a while - to pay all the bills. What reason does he have to "grow up" and be responsible for who he is?

Answer 9

You must be the jealous ex who can't move on and needs to seek everyone's attention by making him sound so bad.

Get over it already.

Answer 10

Because he is a bum. And he cares about no one but him self. And his grandmother loves him, so she will do what ever she can.