I am just completely falling for this man, and I know it is wrong, but I am looking for every way possible to justify this situation.
Is there anything positive about being with a married man? I don't know what is wrong with me, but I just really feel a connection with him.
2007-09-10 15:08:28 · 49 answers · asked by lala2007 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Follow your heart. You may have a connection with this man that is the best thing for you. Also, who is to say that the realtionship with his "wife" is the best for him? These other people are telling you to back off because most people would rather be in a miserable marriage than deal with reality that they could be happier and better off without that baggage. Live, love, and be happy.
2007-09-10 17:21:32 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sorry but theres nothing positive about being with a married man.. think of it this way..
what if u fell in love with the man of your dreams, u loved him with all ur heart, had children with him, had the life u pretty much dreamed of, then one day that all came crashing down around u, ur hearts broken, ur life as u knew it has come to a hault, your children are crying begging for daddy to come back and theres nothing u can do to make that happen, all because another woman decided to set her sights on your husband and persuaded him with temptation.. NOW GRANTED, no man can be stolen unless he wants to be so the blame falls mainly on him, but Why on earth would u want a man that was capable of leaving his family for another woman, do u think ur that special ? Do u think that he didnt ever once feel the same way for her? of course he did or he would of never asked her to marry him.. he felt all the giddy newness feelings that ur feeling now for him.. and just like with her.. eventually things become routine.. life will become content, u'll have ur issues as every married couple does, and then when the next girl comes along he'll be gone again, and u'll be sitting there crying wondering how he could do that to u.. when he's already proven that he has zero respect for family and marriage or he wouldnt of left his first family for you.. So why on earth would u want to have a man that can walk out so easily.. ur not that special sorry.. u can be the sweetest , the prettiest, the youngest..etc.. and it wont matter, eventually u will become routine.. and there will always be someone "different" out there waiting in the wings to tempt a man that is willing to be tempted.... Go find a man of your own with all the great qualities u see in him.. and build a family of your own, dont even attempt to destroy a family that is already made.., have more respect for women, marriage, family, and yourself to do that..
2007-09-10 15:24:21 · answer #2 · answered by brwneyedgrl 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Nothing positive will come out of having a relationship with a married man. You can't justify cheating. So instead of looking for ways to justify it and make it OK, look for ways to keep your mind occupied elsewhere. The attraction is probably having the unattainable and if you have any character at all you will over ride your basic instincts. After all, you are a human being, not a dog. If you really feel a connection to him then let him live in peace and respect his family.
2007-09-10 15:11:28 · answer #3 · answered by mafiosu 5 · 5⤊ 1⤋
Really, nothing good could become of it. If you did "get with him" and a relationship flourished, would you really trust him? In the back of your mind, don't you think you'd be wondering, where is he? What's he doing? Why isn't he here? You'd have no grounds for trust. You can't start one relationship without finishing another one first. Your relationship with him would end up just like his relationship with his current wife. If he's falling for you too and he's acting on it, you need to be the bigger person and tell him to get his s#$% straight and handle his business. You are going to look like the homewrecker when all he wants is a piece of something he doesn't have right now. That's all you are is something new...he doesn't love you, he just doesn't have you. Make sense? There's no justification to the situation. He took an oath in front of his wife and God, let him handle what he needs to handle without you falling in love. I don't mean to sound so harsh, I just have experience in this category. Walk away, if you're smart, you'll walk away. Possibilities are, if he did divorce, he wouldn't want just you...he'd want to play the field, he'd want all the new toys he could play with, because that's what you are, a shiny, new toy sweetie.
2007-09-10 15:26:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do you believe in karma? I guarantee if you get married, you
will be on the receiving end. You admit it's wrong for liking a married man. So what you feel a connection with him. I bet his wife did too! Hence why they married. He's only paying attention to you because married life became boring. Your just the fire he was looking for to light his cigarette. Once he''s done smoking you, you'll fall apart. Leave him now. Have some decency!
2007-09-10 15:22:06 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
How about the idea that he may have a disease that will ruin your life or lack there of? Would you be interested then? Or how about the fact they might have children did you consider that? How would you feel if that happened to your mother and father's relationship? No man is worth your self respect and since this type of issues are never one way I assume he has been giving you the green light to get too close. If he really wants you in his life he should divorce his wife first you should be worth the wait. Unless you are like a fatal attraction and putting your belongings where its not wanted.
2007-09-10 15:36:29 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
It happens, I had a year and a half relationship with a married man, and the way we looked at it was: (given that he was not going to leave his wife, and that should be your expectations) That if you met someone who was wonderful for you and they had cancer and only had a short time to live and therefore the relationship would be short term, would you rather spend those amazing moments with him, knowing it wouldn't last than to not have those amazing moments at all? Also, the break up is not near as bad as a real one, because most likely when you break up it will be because his wife found out, and he will tell you and you will know he would rather be with you, but his obligations dictate otherwise, so you won't be breaking up because he can't stand you anymore or doesn't like you, it will be because of the circumstances, it is all bittersweet. Also rent "Prince of Tides" you will cry but also feel empathy!!!!
Do what you want to do, don't worry about the stigma of the big scarlett letter that comes with it, it is your heart and life!!
2007-09-10 15:25:05 · answer #7 · answered by Wendy B 2 · 0⤊ 3⤋
The only thing positive is you will learn about heartache, pain and about mis-trust from dating a married man. You need to get away from the situation. If you were married to him or someone else, would you want another woman doing what you're thinking of? He will never leave her for you and if he did, you wouldn't want him, becasue you wouldn't be able to trust him.
2007-09-10 15:13:49 · answer #8 · answered by The Wižard 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It's not bad to want the man, it's bad to act on it. What makes you think that if you get together with him, he wont' cheat on you? Men who cheat are really good at making the women they're cheating with feel a 'connection'. Don't fall for a slimy cheater.
2007-09-11 06:10:13 · answer #9 · answered by abrennan01 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You might feel a connection...but for how long...Hes married hes feeling a connection where ever he can....dont let him use you like that...In most cases married men do not leave their wives for the other woman....If hes cheating with you...He will cheat on you....Please run as fast as you can from this situation....You will not only be hurting yourself...but the woman that is this mans wife.
2007-09-10 15:17:03 · answer #10 · answered by Valerie S 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋