I was raped this past weekend. I'm doing okay - what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger, right? But anyway... I was just wondering if it would be worth it to press charges against the man. He's 20, I'm 17. I consented to the first time we had sex and told him I didn't want to again which is when he raped me. I fought, I said no - it was straight up rape, no question.
My question is... is it even worth it to go through the horribly painful process of court to get him maybe probation for a few months? I mean... a "stupid 17 year old girl" vs. a "20, practically 21 year old majoring in political science and philosophy at the U of M" ... who will win, honestly...? You know what I mean?
I guess I just want to know if the process of rape cases are as painful as they are rumored to be... What could I expect if I pressed charges?
I got a rape kit done at the hospital the next day, fyi. So that's a factor, I guess.
Any advice, really would be great - my friends aren't too helpful
2007-09-10 13:36:00 · 9 answers · asked by h4a5r 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
First, get with a rape or sexual assault counselor, they are trained to help you through this.
Second, think of it this way: would you wish what you are going through on any other 17 year old woman? If you fail to press charges, it's a good bet that this moron is going to do the same to another woman. And I don't care who the hell he is, he is a criminal. What he did to you is unacceptable in any arena, under any circumstances. And, his arrest and conviction may help you in your healing process.
I would seek the assistance of a sexual assualt counselor, my family, and my clergy (if you are of faith). The decision is yours and yours alone. Let your conscience guide you. I wish you all the best.
2007-09-10 13:50:38 · answer #1 · answered by Mangy Coyote 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I really can't answer your question as it requires your decision. One thing to consider is that the odds are he will rape again, if not you, someone else. Rapist are predators and feel empowered by victimizing their prey. Most places have a local Rape Crisis center or some other support group. I recommend you talk to them; and see if you can get a protection order that will keep him away from you for at least a year from your court system. Good Luck!!
2007-09-10 13:53:50 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, press charges. Hennepin, Dakota, and Ramsey Counties both have Victim/Witness offices that have advocates who will help you through the entire process. If you are in Dakota County, the Community Action Council has sexual assault advocates who can also be a support system for you and help you with the court process.
Best wishes and good luck.
2007-09-10 14:14:25 · answer #3 · answered by Sturm und Drang 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It might end up being humiliating for you when you press charges or go to court considering you had sex with him before, but what happens when someone else says no? You really need to take the chance that someone will listen and support your right to say no. I would have to press charges just to prevent it from happening to someone else. What a terrible thing to have happen to you.
2007-09-10 14:00:22 · answer #4 · answered by DeborahDel 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a fricken guy majoring in science and philosophy dont make it right to rape someone reguardless. You have a better chance of winning wether your a grad student or not. Good for you to ge get a rape kit doen, that is all the evidence you need. good luck to you.
2007-09-10 13:45:54 · answer #5 · answered by anonymous 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to the police and the district attny. They will be able to tell you what kind of case you have and if it should be pursued. Sorry that you had to go through that. Even if it is not pursued through the court system - seek help at the local rape crisis center.
2007-09-10 13:43:21 · answer #6 · answered by Boots 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Definitely prosecute, you might not believe it but a court will take more pity on a 17 year old girl than the asshole who raped her, plus your still a minor so you've got that working for you. If you got a rape kit thats is good. If it was me i would do everything in my power to put his *** behind bars
2007-09-10 13:45:56 · answer #7 · answered by cubsfan5289 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Yes press charges. Good luck
2007-09-10 13:43:13 · answer #8 · answered by 1st Buzie 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You deserve better..If you were raped don't let it slide too many girls don't stand up for themselves. Even if you don't 'win' you have said to yourself I won't put up with being abused!
Good luck x.
2007-09-10 13:41:55 · answer #9 · answered by *dream weaver* 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋