Is this ok or normal???

Question

I feel bad for doing this. But anyway. But when my 10 week old daughter is at daycare and I am at school I barely think about her. I feel bad and dont no why. Is it ok to feel bad about this? I s it normal not to think of my daughter alot while at school?

Its not that I dont care I care very much about her. I just find myself thinking of school work and I no my other friend that has a 7 month old thinks about her son ALL the time. I just feel so bad that I dont think about her more and I dont no why.

Answer 1

i think its normal im not really a mother or anything but i babysit a lot and when ever the parents leave it seems they cant let go and always bring their kid home something or hug them till the kid cant breathe

Answer 2

When you are at school, what is it that you concentrate on? If it's your schoolwork, then you probably don't need to worry. You are simply focused on the task at hand. If you spend your time in class daydreaming or planning your weekend entertainment, then yes, you might have a problem.

I think the bigger issue here is your feelings and actions when you are with your daughter. Can you focus on her when you're together? Do you feel positively about her? Do you find joy and satisfaction in caring for her? If the answer to any of these questions is "no," then you may need some help with your parenting. Please don't misunderstand--I don't mean to imply that a "no" answer makes you a bad parent, just that you could use some help or support from someone else.

You don't say how old you are, or whether you and the baby's father are together, or whether you're in 9th grade or graduate school. But the simple fact of the matter is that parenting is hard. Babies don't come with owners manuals, just constant demands. At only 10 weeks, your daughter is not sleeping through the night, so you are tired. She really is just starting to develop a personality, so you don't get much interaction from her. You have homework to do, and housework. You need (yes, I said *need*) time to relax and take care of yourself. All this adds up to stress.

If you had to spend 24/7 in school, you'd go nuts. If you never had a day off from your job, you'd eventually cave in from the pressure. But parenting is a job, too, and it *is* 24/7. This is where the support comes in. You need to find another adult that you can relate to, and who can help you out. If it's baby's daddy or a family member, that's wonderful! But it might be a friend, or someone you know from school. Can you trade an hour or so of childcare a week with someone? Can your daughter go to daycare an extra hour every week so that you can get some quiet time alone? You'll find that taking care of yourself lets you take better care of your daughter.

Answer 3

I am going to assume your a young mother since your in school I too was a young mother with my first. Having my second child 13 years later I notice a HUGE difference this time I was young and not mature enough yet that is why i think there was such a difference not saying i careed less for the first child than the second just differnt times and different circumstances I think you are just fine if your taking care of your child and giving her attention when you are with her.
Dont worry your normal as long as you are doing what your supposed to do.
As someone else stated that school time is your get away time not the best time for just for your self but if you like me your busy and sometimes alone time is not an option.

Good luck

Answer 4

DON'T feel bad! My daughter was 4 weeks old when I went back for my final year of college last year. Being at school, and having something else to think about aside from caring for my newborn was what gave me my sanity when I was a new mom.

It is also okay to feel bad too... just don't feel so guilty you can't do anything about it! Keep forging ahead. It will get better.

Answer 5

I don't think you should be feeling bad about this, You seemed to be pretty busy with school.
As far as it being normal I don't know, I have a 7 month old and every minute I'm away from her I keep thinking about her.. but maybe I over -do it :)

Answer 6

as long as you remember to pick her up. Just kidding. When my friend had her baby she was not very emotional about it for a while. Her daughter was probably 6 or 7 months old before she started worrying about it.

Answer 7

well i thinks it might be normal because maybe while your at school you have so many work to do that you dont have enought time to think about her to much i personally have a 6 month old son and i think about him all the time but dont worry about it the important thing isnt that you think about alot but that you love her and treat her great when your with her good luck

Answer 8

I wouldn't say that it's normal. I do the same as amosunknown. We tried to go away for the weekend a couple of weeks ago and couldn't do it!! We ended up only going away for only 1/2 of a day and I bought my son soooo much stuff while i was gone. (We were gone for 12 hours) I called probably 6 or 7 times and was roming on my cell phone even!

Answer 9

O.K. Here is the bottom line. Your little Ava is bonding with another person. If you don't add her to your schedule of thoughts, then, she won't feel your vibrations of love.

She should be your top priority. During lunch, call and have the Caregiver put the phone to ear and whisper sweet somethings to her. Don't let her forget about you. Her world is small.

Answer 10

Wow... I put my son in his crib for a nap and he's all I think about, and he's nearly 8 months old. Both times Ive ever left him home with someone else and gone out I ended up spending money buying him tons of stuff instead of enjoying myself.

I dont know if thats normal or not, I know for me its totally not normal at all.