I am thinking about filing a devoce. How can tell my wife and avoid a war? Any suggestion please?

Question

We only lived for a year and a half and it did not work out. At this point, I can see that she just wants to fight with me. But I want to go and start every thing from the scratch. We are both successful professionals. Our family consoler says she is paranoid and she can not accept it.
What should I do? I have had enough. I do not want to start another war in the court.

Answer 1

Lots of sleeping pills. Take them and see if you wake up in the morning.

Answer 2

There is no way to avoid a "war" if she is already fighting with you. Maybe she also wants a "devoce" (divorce?) Find out in counseling if she would agree to a separation. Then find your attorney and file after you separate.

There must be more to it since you say you dont want to start another war in the "court". Legal issues already? Then talk to an attorney first.

Answer 3

Go back to the family consoler every weeken. Have the professional keep telling her that she is paraniod. That after the meeting have a family dinner. WIth her family, and if they as how she is doing, just tell them the doctor say she is paranoid. And if your wife disagree on the spot, then family member will said yes on the spot. The goal is to make her accept what she is than file for divorce. That way you don't have to go to war

Answer 4

I find it hard to believe you are a "professional" because your spelling is atrocious! Anyway, if you've given your marriage a good try and have been to counseling together and it's not working, then, ask your wife why she wants to stay with you if she doesn't trust you? If she claims she can't trust you (even if she is paranoid and is mentally sick), then tell her that you will give her a divorce. Ask her if she wants to file or if you should. Make it seem like a joint decision. It will go better.

Answer 5

Have you considered telling her in the presence of your couples' counselor? It would seem that it would be best, that way if she starts to have a fit then the counselor (as a neutral 3rd party) can step in.

Frankly however unless you want to be stuck for the rest of your life in this relationship, the only way to start over is to just be frank and tell your wife that you want a divorce, and then carry through as quickly, professionally and unemotionally as possible.

Answer 6

If she's paranoid, it's unlikely you can avoid
a fight, but you can try.
You say she's a professional. Maybe you can
engage her rational side.
If things aren't working, and you both want to
split up, doing it by agreement is a lot cheaper
for both of you.
If you can engage her in negotiation, even if you
give up a bit too much, it's cheaper than separate
lawyers.

Answer 7

Do you feel that there is anything to work with as far as try to get along? If she is always wanting to fight than she isn't happy either. Maybe you could sit down and TALK and get her to agree to a dissolution that you can both agree on, if not than hire an attorney and expect it to go from bad to worse. Good luck, hope you find happiness.

Answer 8

there will be a war u can expect that from her especially if she is paranoid. get yourself a good attorney and do the best u can not to argue with her. has she gone to counseling or does she take medication to help her ways of thinking?

Answer 9

There's no easy way to do this. If she's a fighter, she'll fight about this too. All you can do is buckle up, and get ready for a rough ride. Divorce is never easy, no matter how it's done.

Answer 10

Sorry but it may not be able to be avoided. You are a professional and you can't spell divorce???