I started talking to this girl a while ago,just as a friend.She had a bf at the time.We got to know each other well.I trusted her with everything.We clicked and I felt there was something different about this girl.She left her bf later and a while down the line we started dating.It didnt last long because she went back to her ex.Her excuse was they had history together and she couldnt be alone.This happened a few times where she went back and forth.In between all that she found out that her ex had cheated on her.We dated again and then got married.It was fine for a while,but then she started wanting to go out and have fun.She's not 21 yet,but she still could go to places.That was fine with a few friends.What got me was that she wanted to hang out with her guy friends alone and would get late night phone calls from them.Granted she gets out late-11pm.I cant get her outta my mind.Most of u will say get over her, keep yourself busy. I get alot of signs though like songs and shows i see.??
2007-09-10 09:14:20 · 10 answers · asked by P1-G 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The only hope you have of calming your wife down would be to get into marriage counseling with her! Let someone help find out what is going on in her mind and help to redirect her if she wants to keep the marriage. It sounds like she has a lot of growing up to do and although she married you she still wants the single life. It is wrong that she wants to hang out with guy friends alone and being a guy you know where some of their minds could lead to! She should only want to be with one guy hanging out and that is you!! What she is doing is out of line with a serious marital commitment and I could see how late night phone calls from guys would disturb you. It seems that she doesn't know what she wants but as long as you allow her to continue on this way she will continue to do so over what it makes you feel like. This is not appropriate behavior for you to tolerate to keep her in your life. You have feelings and emotions to and the path she is on will only lead to getting emotionally hurt further on! She feels comfortable and safe with you and life seems all about her and not you. You are being taken forgranted and not considering you in the picture at all. You may have to take the chance of standing up to her and giving her an ultimatum. It is better that you accept the truth about where things really stand before you decide to have a child with her and lose that to before she sees that it is time to grow up. You cannot live like this no matter what you feel about her because sometimes love isn't enough when you get nothing back in return. Marriage is about settling down in your life and working and growing together as a couple. It takes both of you knowing what is acceptable and not acceptable in your life together. Its about compromise and trust and protecting one another from anything on the outside of it tearing it down. Your wife needs to realize that she is hurting you and care enough to stop running around and either be married or leave you to find someone that truly can and will.
2007-09-10 09:45:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry that you are getting a divorce. I know you love her. It seems like she wasn't ready to get married.
Its not easy to get over someone that you love. And for awhile you will have your song played on the radio and it will seem like fate is calling you and telling you that you are still meant to be together. It only really seems like that to you right now because your sensitive to things that remind you of her. You are hurting badly. Stuff like that is going to happen. But you can't make it go away. I am sorry.
Having been through a divorce (a year ago come October) I can tell you that it will get better. It won't always feel this way. And there will be days when she'll be all you can think about. And there will be days when you don't have one thought about her. Then One day you'll hear about how she cheated on her next boyfriend and then you'll know that this was for the best.
I don't know if this was an answer exactly, but I hope that you at least feel better. Good luck.
2007-09-10 09:35:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sit down together and say "Your father and I will not be living together any more. Daddy is moving out. It is not your fault." Emphasize that it is not their fault. Then he should kiss them good bye and go get a hotel room. Do not scream and yell. Pack his clothes and put them in his hand and put him out. Change the locks tomorrow. Allow him to see the girls as often as is practical. After he's gone, you need to decide if you want to go to marriage counseling and try to get over this. If not, call a lawyer tomorrow. Be calm. You can also ask him to call her right now in front of you and end it. Then you speak to her and make it clear that she never contact him again. After that either put him out or make him sleep on the sofa. You don't have to make a decision right now unless he chooses not to call her.
2016-05-21 06:53:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
u married a girl who wasn't yet grown up and ready for marriage. problem is u did not get to know her well enough before u made a commitment and married her. it does take time to get over someone u loved and thought u would spend the rest of your life with, wish i could tell u it was easy and the hurt would leave u real soon, but i can't. its a grief process's one must go through in order to go on in life and find happiness. have u ever tried praying to the lord when life is full of hurts?
2007-09-10 09:53:36 · answer #4 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you arent getting "signs", come on. You are married to a CHEATER. She cheated on her boyfriend with you, and then you with him, and now she is just going out and wanting to party.... you never should have married her, you are way too young and so is she. How long were you even dating before you got married? You are both way too immature, and she is a habitual cheater. It will take time, but you will get over her. She doesnt love you, and there isnt anything you can do about it. end of story.
2007-09-10 09:21:07 · answer #5 · answered by sami_sam 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
She is very young and marriage is something she doesn't seem to takes that seriously. You really need to get away from her for awhile until she figures out whats she wants. And it does seem like she is cheating on you. Do you really want a woman like that.
2007-09-10 09:26:54 · answer #6 · answered by Feelsolost 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wake up.
You may love her, but she doesn't love
you and trying to hang on just gets you
hurt worse.
From the way you write, you were both
way too young to get married.
It was a mistake. Cut your losses and
correct it.
2007-09-10 09:58:57 · answer #7 · answered by Irv S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married a young, immature girl. What were you thinking, man?
2007-09-10 09:21:33 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You married an undecisive 20 year old...that's your only problem.
2007-09-10 09:17:54 · answer #9 · answered by ron-D 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
See...marrying that sweet young stuff isn't all its cracked up to be now is it.
2007-09-10 09:20:41 · answer #10 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋