OK pleasse read!!! My exes wife?

Question

Ok the love of my life and my best friend david , has always been there after he left we were both in agreence with him leaving cause his ex was pregenent and said he would never see his son if he was with any one but her. So I let him go he didnt leave me for her he left me for his child and I am ok with that. well his wife tried to kill her self again. He came to me and told me he loves me and he doesnt know what to do. I wold him to do what he feels in his heart and no matter what I would be there for him. And then I told him you know I love you I let you once and I will do it again, if that is what makes you happy. i will always be there for you. wether it be 40 years I will wait, I support your decision, he then told me I love you and I sorry to put you through all of this. Did I say the right thing? should I have told him to come home forget her. I didnt want to push him, but I wonder if I should have been more aggressive with the idea of leaving her instead of being there for hi

And yes I do love him. all I ever wanted was for him to be happy wether it be with me or some one else. he is my one true love.

I made him go to be with her for his son he didnt want to go. The only thing keeping him there is the baby, and school he has 2 more months until he graduates.

I have not put life on stand still I am dating and moved on he is still my best friend and he knows it

Answer 1

I wonder how you will feel if he married you and then cheats on you and treats you like Sh*t.....HE IS STILL MARRIED MOVE ON. This guy is BAD NEWS. He loved his wife too and look how he treats her, THE MOTHER OF HIS KIDS. She tried to kill herself bc he is a cheating bastard, both of you deserve better.

Answer 2

Sometimes good people get into bad situations, and being a good person you try to do the right thing, but sometimes that's not always the best thing. What David did for his child is a good thing, but staying with the mother is not the best thing.

This woman is obviously unstable and has some very serious issues. I am going to tell you that after what just happened with my own cousin and his kids because of an unstable wife and mother, his staying in this situation or leaving his child with this woman is NOT the answer.

My advice to you comes based on a situation I have been witnessing that has escalated into something really terrible, so please believe me when I tell you that the right thing in this instance is not a good thing. David needs to take his child and separate himself from this woman. Because of her mental history he can fight for sole custody and win. He needs a good attorney who is skilled in father's rights.

This will not be easy. He will need emotional support. He may need some financial help. It will put a strain on your relationship at times, but he needs to do this. If you are seriously committed to this man, help him to understand that and then be prepared for a battle.

I wish you all the luck and my prayers are with you. This is one time when holding a family together may prove more harmful than good.

Answer 3

First him being told he would never see his son is BS .. We have what is called a court system and they supply men with all kinds of rights to being a daddy including paying childsupport. If she has tried to kill herself and has already had the child he needs to leave and take the child with him and apply for temp child custody until a full custody hearing can be done. She seems unstable to me and that isn't healthy to any kid. How do you feel about being a mother? Are you already a parent? Could you love someone elses child? These are the questions you should be asking yourself. If he loves you and you love him, he needs to take the kid and you and him provide a life for that child that is better then mommy trying to kill herself. She sounds selfish and unloving and needs serious help. But first that child needs protection.

Answer 4

it sounds like u really do love him, and i admire u for not tellin him to leave his baby for u.
nowadays people do not need to stay together for a baby, as it just doesnt work!
it will never work. and i think it makes it harder on a baby to see their parents arguing more because of only bein together over a child!

i think u said the perfect thing, as i feel like u have said it from ur heart. u sound to me like the 2 of u deserve each other, but dont push it any further than u have. u have done all the hard work now. its time now that u sat back and let him make up his mind. its like this if i man loves a woman then he will not let anything stand in the way of him being with her and he wont stop til he is with her.

given time, i can say that i think he will realise that there is no point in being with a woman out of pity guilt, or children.
i have seen this with people i know before, tryin to kill themselves over tryin to keep their men, when its clear that ther men dont want them. n some people trap men by fallin pregnant. he will soon waken up and realise that he cant spend the rest of his life like that.
until he does, just wait, and i promise u, that he will come to u. u seem to be the only sane thing in his life.

good luck sweet heart.

Answer 5

Listen you did the right thing by letting this man go on with his life and take care of his child. If you supported his decision than you should not tell him that he can come back don't separate this man from his child it is not good and he will never forgive you let him work out just be there when he needs you as a friend that's all.

best of luck

Answer 6

First of all..it sounds like a lot of immaturity going on here on both sides, and second, as long as he is paying child support then there is NO way she can keep him from seeing his son. If the mother is suicidal then if I were the dad I would fight to get custody of the child and get a way from her. She needs help coping with her issues before she can be a fit mother. As far as you waiting on him, how long are you willing to wait? The child is always going to be in the picture so are you willing to put your life on hold for good?

Answer 7

So, the love of your life left his pregnant ex for you? And because she said he would never see his son, he went back to her? And now that she's tried to kill herself "again," he's told you that he has to stay with his wife (which is the woman you identified as his "ex," but she's now his wife)? Are you on some sort of medication, or don't you know when a man is making a damn fool out of you? Wake up, girlfriend.

Answer 8

Ask yourself these questions: 1) Do the photos represent competition to you? If so, how? 2) Do you see the photos as a threat to your marriage? 3) If the photos never existed, but you knew he had the same images ingrained in his memories, would that bother you less? If you answered yes to number 1 or 2, the only valid reason for feeling this way if these women were still in contact with your husband socially or your husband had cheated on you with them. In regards to number 3, do you think your husband would tell the truth if you asked him if he still fantasized about people he once dated? Would you tell the truth if your husband asked you the same question? I don't think it is appropriate that he has these photos and he's really dumb for allowing you to find them. And while lying about them is wrong, who wouldn't lie about something like this. He lied because he wants you to believe you are the only woman he ever thinks of. Pretty normal actually. If these women are simply in his past and never had anything to do with you or your marriage, I wouldn't make a big deal out of it. The photos only represent memories of the past and we all have past sexual relationships that we remember.

Answer 9

He isn't yours to love!! If his wife is suicidal I would steer clear, her death isn't something I would want on my conscience and furthermore I would wonder what it is that has brought her to this point in her own life....could it be her cheating husband who is the father of her unborn baby? You say he didn't leave you for her he left you for his son and I had to laugh because when he created that son I would have to guess he chose her over you....get a clue Sherlock!! Have you ever stopped to think about her? Have you ever put yourself in her situation and wondered what it would be like to be pregnant and with someone who could care less and is unfaithful and what makes you think he would be any different with you? My advice would be to find a man who could actually be with you and move on and let this situation resolve itself.

Answer 10

Much as I hate to say it, he left you for his wife, not his son. Too many courts of law for her to be able to keep him from seeing his child without valid, supportable, provable reasons. Nobody can stop anybody from killing themselves. If they want the job done, sooner or later, it's going to get done. Stop letting this man trick you emotionally, he is clearly with who he wants to be with. He knows what to say to you, to get you to go along. I guarantee, if you make a fuss about this, he'll turn it around on you soo quick it'll make your head spin! His wife will be the poor victim and you will be this horribly selfish person who doesn't think about anyone but herself. If you think I'm wrong, go ahead and make a stink, tell him you're tired of riding in the back seat, enough is enough! See if it doesn't play out in a similar fashion to what I described. Good Luck, I hope you find someone who really gives a damn about you.

Answer 11

He should do an intervention with her family and get her professional help. Then when she's stabilized and feeling a little stronger, he should be honest with her and tell her he's not in love with her, but will always care about her and be connected through their child...he should let her know that he wants to remain friendly and the priority is the best interest of their kid. Then he should be with you and if she is bitter about this and keeping him from his child, he should pursue his legal rights through the court system. You have been very selfless and supportive, it must be very painful to not be able to be with him. **comfort** Good luck!