because I had been helping another firend with her baby that was in the hospital. I didn't want to hang out for long. She got mad because I wanted to call it a night so she started calling me a grumpy ***** and saying mean things. She drinks, I don't so she said I needed to drink so I would lighten up. She always has to have the final say and if I don't do what she wants then she gets mad and doesn'ttalk to me for a week or so. She thinks she is the best parent and her kids are so good. Frankly, I don't like to have my daughter around her much because she always screams and cusses at her kids. I don't want my child around that.. I did away with some back child support that my daughter's sperm donor owed. She reamed me for it saying I was stupid. I really want to say something to her but I know that it is going to cause a big scene and I dont' want that. She gets mad and cusses and says horrible things about me and others. Please give some advice..
2007-09-09 22:54:09 · 4 answers · asked by southern comfort 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Dump her if she is making you unhappy, there are legal ways to stop her from bothering you should she try, it is hardly a 'friendship' between you.
2007-09-09 23:04:42 · answer #1 · answered by joe 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off, no offense, but you're judgemental as well. Obviously you're biased, because you're in the situation, but the reader, if they have half a brain, will realize you're very judgemental about her yourself. Also, you shouldn't put people in a situation where they're cornered. "She drinks, I don't, so I said she needed to drink so I could lighten up..." Well you said you don't like having your daughter around her because she screams and cusses around her child. That's probably due to drinking, hangovers from drinking, and maybe a little *not mature enough to be a mother* from drinking. You're putting her straight into the problem.
If you're tired, say you're tired, reschedule for the next day or two so that it doesn't seem like you don't want to be around your friends. Maybe sometimes she doesn't agree with your ideas (The sperm donor paying child support, or not talking to you if you don't do what she wants), agree that it's best opinions stay to yourselves if they're not agreed upon. Just stop talking when she downtalks you and she'll eventually get the point, or bring up a new subject.
Being friends for such a long amount of time makes you realize your differences, which can be tough, but can also be good for you, because you don't need excuses for why you didn't do this, and why you didn't go here, just tell the truth and it gets you by, most of the time. If you change your ways around her, and she doesn't, well then you shouldn't stay friends. I know it's probably hard having been friends for such a long time, but as you've shown, she upsets you a lot, and that's not what friends are supposed to do.
2007-09-09 23:07:59 · answer #2 · answered by JustAGirlX 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is no friend to you. You should avoid even talking to her. I had a "friend" like that once. She thought that she could do no wrong. When she did things that were against my moral character, she would say things like I was a prude or stuck up. I let it go for 16 years. One day, after I had done soooooo much for this bit#h, another friend of mine told me that all she did was talk bad about me behind my back. Then another friend told me the same thing. Pretty soon I got the picture. When I split with a man that verbally abused me every single night of my life for years, she took his side and alienated me. She did me a big favor. Now she wants me to forgive her, and I have. I will not, however, consider her my friend or be a part of the family, as we called ourselves, again. She still tries sometimes, but I refuse to associate myself with that kind of person again. Now other people are doing the same thing. They are finally seeing her for what she is.
With friends like that, who needs enemies? You don't need to put up with all of that. Either avoid her, or tell her to mind her own business when it comes to your life. YOU DO NOT HAVE TO LIVE UP TO HER (VERY QUESTIONABLE) STANDARDS.
2007-09-09 23:16:59 · answer #3 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she sounds cukoo.how can you even say shes a friend?get rid asap.shell end up jumping off a building with your kids or something then murdering you.phone the police quick.shes insane.if i was you id move again to the outer hebrides to get away from her.thats just my opinion.
2007-09-09 23:29:21 · answer #4 · answered by muse 32 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋