Do you think it"s wrong for a woman to be a stay at home mom and rely on spouses income ?

Question

I have been a stay at home mom for 10 years, people tell me all the time that i should not rely on my husband for all our fianancial needs, but they are always expressing how nice it must be to have so much " free " time . well let me tell you that staying at home I work twice as hard than I did when I ran my own buisness. Yes, All our $$ comes from my husband's job
but I Trust and love him , Why do people not relize that if a woman is secure in her marriage that they are not stupid. what do you think about the situation ?
P.S I have a very healthy nest egg of my own

Answer 1

I think it's none of their business how you and your husband have arranged your lives. You have a nest egg and your kids have someone at home. What could be wrong with that? Tell them to leave you alone and mind their own business.

Answer 2

That's simply how we felt, I went from complete time to facet time, I paintings Wednesday, Thursday and a part day Friday, with ease slicing my cash in part, however the time I spend with my loved ones has made the whole thing think such a lot less difficult, we uncover if we're a little deficient one month, we will be able to control on much less since there may be SO a lot much less strain within the residence, what use to be reason for a massive blow up is a lot more like a shared complication now. I do not feel I can present any suggestions, we discovered fairly that we wasted plenty of cash (we did not recognize) and after we realised precisely how a lot we fairly did not want, we controlled bigger on what we had. It was once nearly unintended, I was once signed off paintings in poor health for eleven months, and after 6 months on complete pay, it went right down to part pay - and I idea we might sink however we did not, so whilst I was once good adequate to return, I went again on facet time hours. I do not feel I might were courageous adequate to try this if it hadn't occurred this manner, however when you consider that it did, now we have been a lot bigger off as a loved ones, if now not financially. I can stroll my son to institution 2 days per week and decide upon him up 3 instances, I additionally get to make bigger meals when you consider that I am house to do it, and I have the time. The meals isn't just bigger, however when you consider that I have so a lot more time, I can placed within the attempt to buy round and get bigger components so it expenses us much less. Instead of a $6 pizza at 6:30 whilst I was once too worn out and bored stiff and out of time to do something else, I can purchase decreased cost veg and spend $three on cubed steak and make a well casserole. Why do not you recall going facet time and seeing how that is going?

Answer 3

People got into this 'mode' back in the 70s the fema-nazis proclaimed a woman could not be fulfilled unless she has a 9-5 job (stupid but college women were buying it at the time).

Of course, you work twice as hard as any of them in the office, you are on the go 24/7 you can't leave your work at the office. Many days you might have a nice quiet lunch but 9 times out 10 your running errands, nursing a sick child, making meals, cleaning house, gardening, doing laundry and the like. But you do these things because you want to meanwhile your husband is doing his part supporting the family by going to an office 9-5 and dealing with the commute, stupid coworks and multiple bosses.

Its really evens out... there are just fewer of us than there was 30 years ago. I didn't buy into the 'big lie' and neither did you.
Maybe our daughters can turn the trend back again. I wouldn't go back to a full time paying job its not any fun!

Answer 4

So I was a "stay at home mom" for 3 weeks after my baby was born (maternity leave). It was absolutely the easiest 3 weeks of my life (well, minus the pain i had for a week after giving birth and absolute BOREDOM). I will just be frank. I earn over 300k a year (management consultant), my husband more than double that (hedge fund manager). Obviously, we could easily live on his salary alone. But we don't see the point of sacrificing the 300k, plus I found those three weeks were an intellecual graveyard of misery! I kept trying to log in to the server at work remotely, but I kept getting bounced since I was supposed to be on "paid leave," resulting in calls from my boss asking me "what the hell are u doing?" LOL I ended up not even taking my full paid leave (i took 3.5 weeks, i had 8 weeks). My son is a happy kid, he and i still find time to cook together, he and his father play games together as well. We have a combination of family and a nanny caring for him. Our nanny is a retired school teacher, and I openly admit she is more fit to raise a child with me - since she is trained to develop communication/reading/mathematics/etc skills, especially with family supervision. My husband and I split housekeeping chores - we have no maids. I do the cooking and he does the dishes after we both work a 10+ hour day. I am not complaining, I like it this way, but this is hard work...with basically no free time at this point.

Answer 5

Our job as a stay at home mom is a 24 hour 365 day a year job. Technically we should be getting paid, It's been estimated at $120,000 a year if we were out in the workforce. Free time? I don't think so, and although those people talking wouldn't realize it, because they are receiving a paycheck and going to a workplace every day. I do 10 times more, being home than I ever did at work. It's also the most important job a person could have. People should respect that more.

Answer 6

Being a stay-at-home mom is an INCREDIBLY tiring, time-consuming, all-encompassing job that anyone who isn't doing it or hasn't done it cannot even imagine. First of all, on the financial aspect, depending on how old your kids are, you're most likely actually SAVING money by staying home. If you went to work, chances are your income would be mostly paying for child care. You're working for someone else to see your child's first steps?! No thank you!

Second of all, if it works for your family, then it works for your family. Everyone has their own dynamic, no "one way" is perfect. Some moms can't handle being with their kids all day long, some can't imagine being away. Some moms Have to work, some want to, and some don't. We're All In This Together!!! The point is to raise healthy, happy, secure, respectful, sensitive and loving kids, right?

Do what works for you, and enjoy.

Answer 7

So lets play the what if game for example: what would happen if your husband died? or became incapacitated for some reason? do you have the $$ to continue staying at home?, I see you ran your own business so depending on what kind of business are you up to date with technology needed should you want or need to start working again? where would the support come from etc... its cool that you rely on your husband for support and as you already have a healthy nest egg of your own and know where your support will come from, should (god forbid) these events ever happen then more power to you, yes it is ok to be a stay at home mother, I am a stay at home mother too.

Answer 8

I think that if you choose to be a stay at home mom and your husband is willing and accepting of that and is not looking forward you to working I say to each it's own. Who are we to judge if a woman wants to be a stay at home mom most mom do not have that privilege and those who do I know wish that they were working because you do work more than on a job with cleaning the home, car pooling the kids to and from school, preparing dinner, helping with homework, and making sure everyone takes their bath, brush their teeth's and prepare for tomorrow. Some women feel that being at home that you do not have your independence because you have to depend on your husband to give you money like he is giving you an allowance and that you have to ask for it when if you are working and making your own money you can spend it on what you want and need and not have to ask for anything. If you want to stay home then do it but if you ever get tired and want to trade I would take your life in a heart beat. Do what you do and the hell what the rest they are just jealous because at the end of the day you get to rest and they have to work from 9 to5 and still deal with their kids.

Answer 9

There is nothing wrong with a stay at home wife. Years ago, most women did it. When I did, my husband and children enjoyed better, healthier meals. My home was cleaner, the clothes lasted long because I had more time to take care of them. My yard and gardens were always beautiful without having to hire a gardener, and my house looked like a picture, because I was always doing an improvement job in it. My children's grades never suffered, and they always had a ride to the school functions, parties, etc... Basically no one was neglected in the home. Don't ever feel guilty for not working--YOU DO WORK!!!!!

Answer 10

Sweet Pea I am a stay at home mom too and I have been married for nine years. For the last 1 I have been at home raising the children and making sure my hubbie has what he needs to make the household prosperous. see one thing outsiders can't understanding is investing in your marriage. This is a great opportunity and I think it is wonderful. I have found my marriage to much more successful with me staying at home than me working all the time. My children have changed for the good also. See, when you invest in your marriage as much as a stay at home mom does you will see your marriage blossom and grow right before your very eyes. You keep doing what you are doing because not only is this ethical, it is most definitely biblical. God bless you and your marriage!

Answer 11

I dont think it's wrong. I think your children are lucky to have someone there for them. I work full time and I wish I could have 'free time' but I'm not ignorant to think stay at home moms do nothing but sit on their rears. (ok...some do) but majority of the ones I know have immaculent houses and are running errands and taking this kid to soccer and the other to baseball or whatever the case may be. helping with homework, having meals ready for the family, etc....They do work hard. I wish I didn't have to work a full 40 and do all that too. consider yourself blessed!! Don't worry about what other people tell you either.