A fast death occurred
ripping apart perceptions
once clearly steadfast
Futile to amend
the misconception realized
for the truth it is
A sad sacrifice
with no redemption in sight
caused a vacuum
A hard lesson learned
never to be forgotten
in the jarred essence
2007-09-09 17:11:53 · 11 answers · asked by Marguerite 7 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Poetry
I don't understand those who expect everything to be explained out for them. When you listen to pop or country music the story is told in simple terms. Basically, you're told what to think, how to feel and when to stop thinking once the song is over. But with music without lyrics, like the music of Beethoven, the creator is giving you an emotional blueprint and asking, even expecting, you to fill in the blanks, to actually think for yourself.
My advice to you is to ignore all those who expect everything to be laid out for them in simple black and white and keep doing what you are doing.
I really like your imagery. Nice job!
2007-09-09 18:27:16 · answer #1 · answered by Doc Watson 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you broke up with someone you truly loved, but were not "right" for...?, or you are re-counting a death of a friend on drugs???
The last sentence "in the jarred essence", leaves me asking..,
in the jarred essence.,,,, of what?
are you done with this poem?
2007-09-09 18:35:30 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
At first some of the words seem out of place, different but with reading it a second and a third time I now see why you use them. I like it.
2007-09-09 23:48:44 · answer #3 · answered by Coop 366 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
All thouhts are learned when tragic happens in life, an eye-opener for a new beginnning in life. For after all, behind the silver linings are just challenges to reckon in life.
2007-09-09 17:55:21 · answer #4 · answered by Third P 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
its vey nice Marguerite..
Very orignal, death may occur anytime.
Its beatifully written, poetry is all about feeling
& being a part of what we pen down.
So don't stop nw, keep on writing !!
2007-09-09 18:50:24 · answer #5 · answered by Meiths 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's too vague and the reader won't have a clue what you're talking about unless you explain it to them, and if you were to get this poem published, how would you explain it to the thousands who may read it?
When you write a poem, if you intend on showing it to others, make sure the meaning is clear and not something only you can get. Readers aren't mind readers, but literature is a form of telepathy...if done right.
2007-09-09 17:22:13 · answer #6 · answered by justin schwan 3 · 0⤊ 4⤋
Interesting, very much so. I don't know if I like it or not, but definitely shows talent. Keep writing.
2007-09-09 17:20:16 · answer #7 · answered by herfinator 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Really good...It spoke to me...
Lost in a battle no one's losing...
Cloaked and daggered, fragile beings...
2007-09-10 21:40:28 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Misunderstanding cause all pains in our relationships.
We should never forget it.
Ramesh1938
2007-09-10 13:22:15 · answer #9 · answered by ramesh1938 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
original and thought-provoking. keep up the good work
2007-09-09 17:37:21 · answer #10 · answered by L J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋