with my first son I told my mom that we didn't want anyone in the room with us and my mom and his mom (my mom-in-law) stayed anyway even after i told them no before I started pushing, the nurses and doctor didn't even kick them out after i said no.
now with my second i have told my mom several times that we again wanted to do this by ourselves but she keeps asking me if we are going to let her and his mom watch again and I keep telling her no. She says that you only get to see your grandbaby be born once. she has already seen one born and her mom was never in her delivery room. she wont take no for an answer.
with my first son my hubby didn't even get to see him come out because she stood in the way and wouldn't let him see. we don't want this to happen again and I have told her this and that nobody but me and him were to be in there. Does anybody have any ideas on how to make her understand she has been buged me about this since I got prag. I am 38.5 wks
2007-09-09 14:42:29 · 22 answers · asked by mary m 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Tell your doctor now, and your nurses when you are admitted as well as reminding your doctor then, that you do not want anyone other than your husband present in the delivery room. They MUST abide by your wishes due to HIPPA.
You can wait to call them until after the baby is born, if you wish. That will ensure your wishes are carried out.
Be firm!
2007-09-09 14:50:14 · answer #1 · answered by StayAtHomeMomOnTheGo 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have to tell the nurse who is taking care of you while you're preparing for your delivery - usually the doctor doesn't show up until the last min & is too preoccupied dealing with the labor & delivery. Tell the nurse that the grandparents have trouble taking no for an answer & listening to you. Tell the nurse you do not want them in the room during the delivery. Ask her if you tell them to leave & they don't, if she will tell them they have to leave. Most nurses will do this for you, just make sure they know in advance, instead of at the last min right before the baby is about to be born.
2007-09-09 15:17:14 · answer #2 · answered by tanner 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is a very personal and intimate bonding moment that you are free to experience with your hubby, or with anyone else you want there. If you do not wish more people in the room then demand that it be so. Hospitals have certain rules about it, after all, you are paying, you are the client.
Tell the grandmas that you have a right to privacy and intimacy, that you feel uncomfortable and it simply won't happen. If they keep insisting then you simply neglect to tell them until after the baby is born.
2007-09-09 15:23:18 · answer #3 · answered by Karan 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you doing a written birth plan? If you are, make sure you put this in it and have the doctor sign it -- something about actually signing it might help him/her remember it.
Also, tell every single doctor and nurse that comes in to see you. Repeat it over and over as much as you need to....
But why is this totally up to you? I mean, your husband is NOT going to be nearly as busy as you are. Make is HIS responsibility. Get him on board too, and between him and all the nurses and doctors they should be able to keep it to just the two of you. You might also want to tell your mother just how far you are willing to go to make your birth experience what you want. This is the birth of her grandchild, sure, but it's YOUR child! If she won't listen to what you, as the MOTHER, say now, what's it going to be like in a few years when she doesn't agree with the way you are parenting? Take control now, while you can!
Good luck, and congratulations!
2007-09-09 14:54:08 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
You probably already have, but sit down with her and explain why you dont want her, or anybody else for that matter (except your hubby) in the room. Also before (and when) you start labor make it VERY clear to the nurses and doctors that you do NOT want anybody except your hubby in there. She's your mother, she may get her feelings hurt a little, but she'll get over it. GOOD LUCK and congrats!
2007-09-09 14:52:38 · answer #5 · answered by agrolia 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You may not be able to make her understand and she may come anyway. In that case, unless you hire a labor assistant (doula), it's your husband's job to run interference in this situation. If you tell people absolutely not, and they still come anyway, then he needs to make sure that they don't stay. If he is very uncomfortable with this, make it very clear to all doctors and nurses that you do not want anyone else there when you are giving birth. Let them know this in a birth plan and/or as soon as you get in the room. They shouldn't let people stay that you don't want there.
2007-09-09 14:58:23 · answer #6 · answered by Mrs.P 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
this may sound harsh, but don't call her when you're headed to the hospital...if she is that disrespectful and causing you that much stress, then she may not need to be there in the first place...or talk to the hospital in advance and ask if they can do a better job at making sure your wishes are carried out...i know how you feel, i don't want anyone in my delivery room except for my husband...and if my mom were acting that way, i just would not tell her until after the baby is born...good luck and i hope everything turns out well for you!!
2007-09-09 14:52:48 · answer #7 · answered by Kelly T 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You will have to talk to the doctor and nurses ahead of time. Also, your husband needs to man up and tell them to leave. You are there to focus on your baby not getting the hens out of the room. You may have to be rude which sucks but they're being rude by not honoring your wishes. When they don't leave, that's your husbands que to remind the mothers and the nurses of your wishes. Good luck and be tough! They'll get over it.
2007-09-09 14:56:19 · answer #8 · answered by BrutalBaby 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I was pregnant I requested when I was registered "no visitor's w/o my permission so the nurses came in and told me who was "waiting" and I had total control over who was in the room at all times... You could always tell them to come to the hospital AFTER the baby is born.. Or tell them the doctor's request no visitors.. Or just be honest about what happened the first time and how you and your husband felt about unwanted visitor's....Good luck
2007-09-09 14:49:52 · answer #9 · answered by pebblespro 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i would make sure the doctors and nurses and EVERYONE on staff that could POSSIBLY end up in the room with you KNOW, have it in WRITING and SIGNED that you DO NOT WANT anyone besides your husband and any necessary staff present.
that way they LEGALLY have to oblige and kick the unwanted viewers out.
it is YOUR body. you are over 18, i am assuming considering you are married and have another child, so if you say no and make the doctors aware that you really do mean no, then they legally cannot allow your mom and his mom to stay in the room. invasion of privacy.
best of luck to you... my mom has conned me into letting her stay in the room with me =/ kiiindddd of uncomfortable with that. but its my first one, so i figure i might as well oblige just this once and then with all the rest of them... tough luck =)
2007-09-09 15:10:52 · answer #10 · answered by mums_the_word 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋