Months ago when i found out i was pregnant,(by the way I am 19) i was going in for a pap smear,It was unexpected but the thing is how my doctor told me, He told me he had some bad news and I got alll nervous and scared think he would say that i would have cervic cancer or some but he said i was pregnant. Do you think that was kind of mean just because I am young? I finish high school with a advance diploma, I am in the miliatary and soon to start college majoring in pediatric nursing. So either way i can and am able to take care of my child and I am still with the father i have know for 5 years now. But do u think that was rude of my doctor to tell me like that?
2007-09-09 14:15:42 · 19 answers · asked by Junesia A 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
I am now 23 weeks pregnant and excited!!!
2007-09-09 14:16:54 · update #1
YES that was very rude, a doctor isn't supposed to be judgmental, even if you were 15 and having a baby, its his job just to tell you and your job to do the happy dance or cry!!! Your age shouldn't matter to him, he doesn't know you outside of the office, and he only knows the area between your legs, not between your ears. I would report him for inappropriate conduct. Saying it like that made you feel you should be ashamed for being pregnant. He should be in big trouble for doing that to you. I am happy for you! Good luck with your new baby!!!
2007-09-09 14:24:53 · answer #1 · answered by chefck26 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah I dont think he should have said he had bad news. That was not necessary. He could have just come in said, I have some unexpected news or something.
The way I found out I was pg with my first child was kinda weird too. I was 18 and not prepared at all but she came in and the first thing she said was, 'Do you have any other children?' I said no, she said, 'you want baby?' I said no not really? She said 'well you got baby'
For those who will have a comment for my saying I was not prepared or that I didnt want it; that was my mindset for about a day and then I was completed ecstatic and now my son is 12 yrs old and a very smart, loving, friendly, easygoing, christian pre-teen that I would do anything in the world for!
Anyways yeah that was kinda rude.
2007-09-09 14:25:32 · answer #2 · answered by Davesgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I actually do feel like that is rude. I got pregnant at 17 and my doctor was more than willing to help me through it and make sure that I would be able to support my child and get through the pregnancy in a healthy non-stressed way.
I think that maybe you should let your doctor know how you felt when he told you...i don't know what i would have done without my doctor...she acted almost as a mother to me my entire pregnancy and I can't imagine why your doctor acted like that.
By the way, i now have a very healthy beautiful 8 month old boy who is the absolute love of my life!
2007-09-09 14:24:30 · answer #3 · answered by Casey N 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
That dr. is rude and mean! I can't believe he said that to you. I'm with the other people who say get a different dr. Congrats on your news! It is so exciting. I have to ask how you are in the military and still in high school. Just wondering. It seems like you have already accomplished so much at such a young age and you are quite capable of supporting your child and being a good mom! Good luck with everything.
2007-09-09 14:50:20 · answer #4 · answered by lysistrata411 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Na sometimes docs have no compassion mine had unwanted pregnancy on my chart, i said to him there is a difference between unwanted and unplanned ! , why is that still bothering you what he said lol? how from a pap smear can they tell ya pregnant, not being nasty just curious ?
look im 29 and have 3 kids and one on the way (was twins but lost one last week) this one wasnt planned but hubby and are happy . ive been married for 7 years and people still look at my finger to see if i have a ring some look down at me as i look young. i had a lady that ran into my pram the other week looked at me and said look at the state of you no the wonder you got to kids ! i happly told her oh i have another at school and one on the way what does that make me now ? im well dressed and clean so are my kids , she was just mad she ran into me and i didnt say sorry as it wernt my fault people try to rush around prams.
Point is you are going to get that so best you not worry what anyone thinks and aslong as your happy then thats what counts. hold your head up high :) congrats and best wishes
2007-09-09 14:25:22 · answer #5 · answered by gemma b 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes i think it is some what rude but at the same time i dont think he was trying to be i guess he just thought it would be hard news for you to take its sometimes hard to always say the exact right thing to the exact right people , but as long as you know you can take care of this child theres nothing to worry about and unfortuneatly , there will be allot of ignorant people that will say horrbile things but just take comfort in the knowledge that these people are just uneducated and that your baby will grow up just fine , good luck
2007-09-09 14:21:09 · answer #6 · answered by w j 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Bedside manner isnt always best in male doctors honestly. especially in regard to something they can study until the end of time but never understand. it was in appropriate but if it makes you feel better i went to L&D last week for a few health problems, they talk about admitting me and everything cool fine no prob then the doctor(male) out of no where goes "But its ok at Twenty nine weeks they are viable." First off where the hell did that come from? we didnt need to go there. We know it will be a NICU baby but man what the hell? and the word viable kills me its like saying a car is salvagable, so just another instance of male doctors having crap for bedside manner get used to it. you age is a huge part i am 21 and 30 weeks pregnant with my second child i have been with my fiance for almost 7 years its just because of the age thing you get used to it you skin gets pretty thick i just hate to think of the day i deal with a B**** mother who waited till she was in her 40's to rag me out infront of my kids its already happened but my daughter isnt old enough to get it. like i said skin grows thick fast.
2007-09-09 14:27:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is a very insensitive thing to say for sure, especially for a doctor who should have experience in delivering that type of news. If you are no longer comfortable with that doctor or his perceived attitude toward your pregnancy, I think you should find another doctor. Either way, congratulations, and I wish you a safe and healthy pregnancy and delivery. It sounds like you have a good head on your shoulders and should be excited to welcome a baby.
2007-09-09 14:28:06 · answer #8 · answered by Ambria 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It wasn't very professional for him to say it that way, but I understand why he did. You are a young, unmarried girl, & he probably thought that this wasn't a good time in your life for you to be pregnant. Plus, he probably thought that this was unexpected so you weren't trying to get pregnant, so maybe you wouldn't be too thrilled about it. I don't think he said it to be mean, just a matter of personal opinion & perhaps your circumstances.
2007-09-09 15:33:03 · answer #9 · answered by tanner 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
bringing a new life into the world is never bad news it's a new person to love and to be loved back. Get a new doctor this guy is depressing
2007-09-09 14:24:37 · answer #10 · answered by louise 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋