I'm 34 and he's 22.I'm going thru a divorce from verbally abusive marriage with 2 young children. He's in a college athlete in his senior year. We met on an a dating website almost 2 months ago. we talked on the phone, thru webcam, and text daily until a week ago when he came back to michigan for school (lives out of state in the summer). now he mainly communicates thru email, called only 3 times, and says he needs time to get settled into his school schedule and then we'll meet. he says he still wants me and we still have very sexually graphic convos when we chat online. he keeps saying he's not avoiding me and he wants to see me but it seems fishy to me. Claims not to have a girlfriend either. Supposed to meet today actually and i have heard nothing from him, claims he lost his phone and is waiting for a new one.i know i seem stupid, so why do i still obsess over finally meeting him? why is he doing this to me? If he doesn't want to see me, why does he try to stay in contact someho
2007-09-09 08:28:38 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
good grief.....you are worlds apart leave him be and go figure out why you allowed yourself and your two children to be in an abusive marriage .....fix yourself and take care of those kids.......
you need to see a mental health professional......
2007-09-09 08:32:40 · answer #1 · answered by abc 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You're really in an emotional pickle here. First, 12 years difference in age rarely works, especially when he's only in college. Next, the on line thing is bad.
People will profess to being in love with someone they never met, or claim to think they know them so well. It's a fantasy on their parts. We create an image of the person we wish we could be with, then, when we find someone on line who seems to be fun, transpose those thoughts and ideas onto them. In reality, we need to get to see the person we're going to be involved with on a daily basis...how they are....how they react to certain things....etc. While on line dating may spark interest, be careful that your expectations are real.
I think you need to give yourself some time to heal without any outside influence. Rebound is the word of the day for you and you've set yourself up for this.
In answer to "why is he doing this to me?". Look at the situation and be realistic about it. He's a college student, you've got 2 kids, are going through a divorce, and it sounds to me like there may be just too much drama for him to take, yet he doesn't want to hurt your feelings, so....he contacts you out of a feeling of obligation. I may be wrong here, but doubt it.
The other answer might be that he's just plain busy with his senior year and you need to stop being so desperate. You're an adult for crying out loud...start acting like it.
2007-09-09 10:26:14 · answer #2 · answered by wentfishing2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The ONLY thing that you need to do right now is concentrate on your kids! Leave the boyfriend alone! You need to get your own life back in order right now. Spend very valuable time with your kids, they don't stay little very long. Don't just jump out of the frying pan and back into the fire again.
Do what is right for your kids now, they need you right now. Let the college boy go. Your kids need you more than he does. I hate to say this, but I think that college boy is just playing you.
2007-09-09 09:25:59 · answer #3 · answered by SapphireB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seem like this boy was a nice distraction from your own troubles..but keep in mind he is a boy..probably wanting to focus on what he should at his age..sports, school, dating etc.. you are 12yrs his senior and at a different place in your life. You have a life with your kids and finding yourself as you untangling from a bad relationghip. Let him go and allow him to have his own life.
2007-09-09 08:41:25 · answer #4 · answered by sweetness74 1 · 3⤊ 0⤋
ok in the experience that your in love do not strategies what human beings think of purely be careful and online romance is greater hardship-unfastened than you think of. My fiance and that i met with the aid of the internet on yahoo chat we've been separated majorly i replaced into in Tennessee and he replaced into in Connecticut yet we fell in love and purely knew it, so I packed my jeep up and drove to be sure him for thanksgiving. We met and it replaced into like lightning unbelievable we felt a on the spot bond and now we are engaged to be married and so head over heels in love. in the experience that your in love persist with your heart do not think of of what human beings will say all that concerns is the way you experience purely be careful and have confidence your instincts they are going to lead you interior the the final option course a minimum of mine did
2016-11-14 19:17:50 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He thinks you may be good enough for sex when he is really needing it. However, in his mind you are not even worth that, if it is an inconvience to him. However, since that is what you are needing, he sounds nice so he will probably reward you by giving you sex a time or two.
2007-09-09 09:19:40 · answer #6 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You gotta ask? He's a baby hon, you're a grown woman with children.... is it desperation time for you?
2007-09-09 08:50:04 · answer #7 · answered by April 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
concentrate on your children ..that should be your First priority...get your life straight before you enter into a relationship or you will be getting another divorce....and your children will be messed up somemore...this isn't just about you...
2007-09-09 08:41:10 · answer #8 · answered by sweetness 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
You are kidding yourself over this relationship.* It is not going anywhere.*
2007-09-09 09:04:02 · answer #9 · answered by dca2003311@yahoo.com 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a man your own age, not a boy!
2007-09-09 08:33:40 · answer #10 · answered by The Lady 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋