have the energy to do other things not associated with the kids(getting up early on saturdays to go shopping, for example). Before all the women tell me to help with the kids let me say I do. I change diapers, get them ready for bed, give baths, and much more. We've had babysitters and gone out to dinner many times but then she goes to bed as soon as we get home. I know her self esteem is lowered because her body has changed but how many times do I have to tell her I still think she's beautiful. Im at my wits end. What could be the problem?
2007-09-09 05:56:14 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Come on people! Tell him something he wants to hear! six months no sex!!! I dont blame you for losing your patience, we are men, and I think sex is soo important in our lives, I think a wife should think of her husband and his needs as well.
I wish you all the best and good luck, hope everything will work out for you.
2007-09-09 06:37:38 · answer #1 · answered by fine touch of class 4 · 1⤊ 2⤋
In all honesty, many women don't always see sex as a priority in the same way that other things are priorities. Other women lose some of their sex drive after having kids. If she's shopping for groceries, baby clothes, needed things, then some women will put that above sex. They don't always realize that sex is an important glue in a relationship. You want to be intimate with her and it sounds like you miss that a lot. You don't just sound like some jerk who just wants sex all the time. Some women need to also feel beautiful and not just hear it. You need to talk to her about how your feelings are hurt that she keeps putting off sex. Try to organize a weekend away for just the two of you. Get someone to watch the kids while you're gone. This might be difficult to arrange with a 6 month old baby, but at least give it a thought. You two need to refocus on each other as well as having a family. She needs to see that if you two aren't close and start to drift far apart, other aspects of your marriage life will start to crumble... maybe not tomorrow but in the long run, because you are having a miscommunication about desires. Try to tell her that you are concerned and miss having sex with her. She probably just doesn't think sex is a priority since there are other things that need to be done. Tell her that you're trying your best to help out with everything and be romantic and be close to her but you feel a little rejected. Just try to have an honest conversation without losing your head. That can be hard to do, but if you're calm and try to explain your perspective, she will be more receptive to what you're saying.
2007-09-09 06:24:57 · answer #2 · answered by Rockit 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had my last child 3 years ago, and am very take it or leave it now. But that just will not work in a marriage/relationship as I've found out with a very cranky hubby, though I take some comfort in the fact that there are alot of women out there that feel the same. So......it was time for a long heart to heart. I explained to hubby that it wasn't him, that I really think it is just me(medications,depression and physical illness), we've been together for over 10 years and I've been completely faithful, but was just stuck in a rut. And I asked him what would be suitable(how many times in a certain time frame) and he told me what he thought and I am doing my best to give him what he wants(we came to a compromise). But, it's not all one-sided. I have said to him that if he wants 'woohoo', then I would like the favour returned. More cuddles and attention, I want him to see all the different sides of me and to feel special and appreciated, not just a piece of meat. I also said it'd be great to have a little experimentation, just a little something different to spice things up. And it takes time for a situation such as this to become better, but my hubby and I are getting along alot better now, we're getting what we both want and the marraige feels great to us both.
2016-05-20 05:30:07 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have two beautiful children myself and to be honest, sometimes it does take while to feel like having sex again. I know for me, until I reached a point where I was comfortable again with my own body image I did not want to have sex. It doesnt matter how much you tell her how beautiful she is, its up to her and how she feels. Her body is still going through changes. 6 months may seem like a long time but hang in there. Just keep supporting her like you do.
2007-09-09 06:02:04 · answer #4 · answered by Lovinlife915 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
From a woman's point of view, it takes a different type of energy to go shopping then it does to have sex. It could also be that "lack of energy" is the best way she can describe the way she feels about sex right now. Just as a doctor about it, and talk to her about it, but don't make her feel pressured by your "needs".
2007-09-09 06:23:16 · answer #5 · answered by littlevivi 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she secretly blame sex for the way her body is now; and may have a fear that sex always means getting pregnant. You need to show her that the physical is directly tied to the romance, and the two of you need to keep the fires burning so that your marriage can grow stronger. If you don't have a good private relation with your spouse; when the kids get older they will know something's wrong.
2007-09-09 06:14:32 · answer #6 · answered by runner45 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
after my second child i lost my sex drive for almost a year, something that had never happened to me before or with other pregnancies. her body is still processing hormones and sometimes that takes awhile. try just spending time together, or cuddling. don't make it just about sex as that doesn't help the situation, it just makes it feel like another obligation(something i had to explain to my husband). eventually she will get through this but only with your support.
2007-09-09 06:06:35 · answer #7 · answered by paula t. 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your doctor about the problem, he may be able to help.
2007-09-09 06:00:56 · answer #8 · answered by Sweet Suzy 777! 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Talk to her. Tell her its serious. You're doing everything right and you love her and fancy her. Tell her you need sex and you would rather it was with her!!!!
2007-09-09 06:01:39 · answer #9 · answered by Caroline 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋