Why is my husband NOT effectionate after our recent marriage?

Question

I have had no effection, love, romance after our arranged marriage from my husband. I know this is not normal, so what could be the problem?

Answer 1

You say it was arranged??

perhaps he does not find u sexy ...
or he is in love w/ someone else,
or he is gay?????
i find this odd from a female after arrange marriage???

Answer 2

It seems normal to me. It's an arranged marriage. How long have u known each other before the marriage? That has a lot to do with it for some. I don't know y people expect u to be all shy and OMG! when a suitable match comes to see u, then expect u to act like u've known them for a while, and be totally comfortable after marriage. when u don't know someone, how are u supposed to just be totally comfortable with them? Especially if they're members of the opposite sex? Most Indians don't socialize with the opposite sex, and so, they won';t have much experience or comfort with this, and getting married to someone u barely know won't change this over night. Yes, relations make u closer, but that doesn't mean they're gonna be ok talking with u. THat doesn;t mean they're gonna feel comfortable touching u either. Give him time. He'll come around. If he loves and cares for u(u'll see this in his other actions(what he does, says),). Not everyone's ready to just assume the role of a husband or wife in any manner, even if they wanted to get married. Everything takes time, and it will bring people closer. Good luck.

Answer 3

From your other Qs? I know, you are not together because of visa problems.

Any way it takes two to tango.

This is 21St, century so be a women of that century and take the initiative.

It is difficult to be romantic if you are away from each other.

1. He may be shy.
2. He has not applied for visa because he lacks money.
3. Since this was an arranged marriage you should have figured this things out and discussed the situation about Visa etc. It is very common for people to wait for few years for the visa. So think things over, and find out from him what the problem is. Both of you have right to know this.

Answer 4

Not every man in world is romantic. May be the way he expresses love or affection is different than the way you expect. Whatever is shown in the movies is not the real life and that's not the only way to express your affection. The best thing is to talk to him and tell him that you feel neglected. Tell him that you don't feel loved. Also tell him what you expect from him (what will make you feel loved).
There is one more possibility. In India friends and relatives start teasing if you spend too much time around your wife immediately after getting married. Few people feel shy / ashamed of it. Talk to him and find out.

Answer 5

you advise you probably did no longer verify the field on your marriage license application kind that stated you had intercourse on your wedding ceremony night? there could be different motives for no longer having intercourse, in spite of the undeniable fact that it would not invalidate the marriage. one are in a position to argue an annulment after an extremely short volume if time with no longer consummating the marriage using fact the muse.

Answer 6

I am also in your kind of situation only!!! we had arranged marriage and haven't completed a year yet. From the begining it is the same case. One of my friend also advised the same as what neeraj t has advised.
Tried doing it but in vain. I tried to talk to him a lot, listen a lot and do lot of things to him but still, it is the same case!!! he doesn't get attracted to me. Elders say, due to youth age, men will generally do this and as & when they age, they will have no option other than coming to us. They advised me to give birth to a child and concentrate on the child or learn music or read books.
Whatsoever, I HAVE UNDERSTOOD THAT MARRIAGE SHOULD ONLY BE FOR LOVE AND SHOULD NOT BE FOR ANYTHING ELSE, but its late. Its always the girl who gets affected!!!!
Anyways, keep trying (thats what I do) the advises of neeraj and of course, keep praying!!! good luck my friend!!!

Answer 7

Look Haseena, i really think you need to talk to him, do you think he might have been in a relationship before he married you.. and that he had no choice to marry you.. I am not being horrible, but seriously talk to your husband.. Don't give up, just pray to god, that he brings you both close together inshallah. Maybe you should cook him something special, and just make nice conversation.. make him see you for who you are, let him get to know you, even if he is hurting you just be patient, always smile when he is there.. Don't give up.. Wish you good luck.. Have patience..

Answer 8

its very common question in arrange merriage.
however he will gradually attached with u.
there may be some reason also
he has some other affair
he is over of your taste
he does not like your assets
you are not beautiful in his views
your statement pinch him

please admire:
talk softly
when he needed discuss
listen him, share yr problem with him, when he is in mood.
wear some transparent dress at night
use some duo when you go on bed
use some different style during sex
be cleaned saved yr areas

Answer 9

May be he does not love you. May be he is using you to get to your country.

If your husband does'nt love you and its only 3 months after marriage then there is something other then love on his mind for getting married to you.

Answer 10

Perhaps he only considers you a duty. What have you done to earn the affection, love and romancing you desire. You are both going to have to work really hard at this.