I just found out I am bi sexual and i have no clue how to deal with it. i dont like it and i want it to go away but i cant stop myself of who i am, i told my two best friends about it and my older sister. they are fine with it and respect me. but i dont think i want to tell my parents and my other best friends too, they do respect homosexuals but i just dont know what to do and how to respect who i am?
2007-09-07 20:01:11 · 18 answers · asked by whothiknow 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
It can take time to come to terms with your sexuality. Often our sexuality isn't exactly what we had planned / imagined for ourselves. My girlfriend remembers that as a child she wanted a husband & children - the traditional fairy tale romance - & so when she realised she was gay in her late 20´s it was very hard for her to come to terms with it. She hadn't planned for this outcome so she lived in denial for years. She stayed in an abusive relationship with a man just to prove to herself that she wasn't gay. It was easier for me in a way as I kind of always knew I was different, but I still didn't come out to my family until I was almost 30. My advice would be to take your time over coming to terms with it. You have the rest of your life ahead of you, to realise that it's not really a bad thing & it's only a big deal if you choose to make it one. Don't feel you have to tell people yet if you don't want to, there are no set rules about this, just do what feels right. There are lots of good books out there: try looking on www.amazon.co.uk Good luck & congratulations on being one step closer to realising who you are.
2007-09-08 02:29:45 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop putting labels on things. You are who you are. Why should you bother to tell anyone you know what you want so if you can get it take it and enjoy it. You don't need anyone's respect as long as you have self respect. If someone does not like what you do that's their loss
2007-09-08 04:52:04 · answer #2 · answered by Maid Angela 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
For right now, I think it is okay that you told a few trusted individuals. If you don't feel comfortable about telling your parents right now, don't do it.
For a bisexual, it seems to take longer to accept one's sexual orientation, fully. You have at least made that important step by admitting to yourself that you are attracted to both the opposite and your own. And you are fortunate enough to have three people who took the time to listen to you and validate who you really are.
Good luck to you. You are a courageous young person.
2007-09-08 04:07:26 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
dude , listen to what you just said, You just said you just found out your bi and you don't like it and wish it would go away but you can't stop yer self cuz of who you are. It sounds like you don't like yer self cuz of yer bi stuff but willing to deal with it cuz thats you . You got to make up your mind , you either don't like it and want it to go away , or you have to except it cuz that's who or what you are. If you are just now finding your sexuality I would search some more and make sure this IS your sexuality and not just a phrase your going through.
2007-09-08 03:40:21 · answer #4 · answered by Roy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There seems to be a large section of the population that does not know what it means to be bi-sexual. To begin with true bi-sexuality is very rare. It exists of course but again is not too common.
If a man is capable of having sex with a woman but prefers to have sex with men that does not make him bi. It makes him gay. It goes the same with women. If a lesbian is capable of having sex with a man that does not make her bi because she's capable of it.
Dare to use the "g" word or the "l"word. It's not the end of the world.
.
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2007-09-08 03:31:34 · answer #5 · answered by ericbryce2 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Enjoy your sexuality and you don't have to tell anyone about it that you don't want to. If you're a nice person, you're fine. Just be nice. Why wouldn't you respect yourself? Are you living on your terms or someone elses?
2007-09-08 05:39:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are bi, then that means you are not so rigid in your preferences that you cannot CHOOSE. So why not just stop messing around with the sex that you feel guilty and ashamed over? If you focus your interest in pursuing the sex that your parents would approve of, then there will be NO need in confessing something that causes you torment and embarrassment; thus, problem solved!
2007-09-08 04:35:17 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Please contact the local gay center and ask to speak to someone. Until you accept yourself and realize you are OK you are going to be miserable. FInd gay/bisexual groups that get together to socialize-- safe places, not clubs. .
You didn''t mention your age but you sound young. That will make it harder to get out there and meeting people. But do get out there. You'll be ok. Do not come out to anybody until you feel better about yourself and feel strong inside. You will get static and adults will say it's a stage you're going thru. It sounds like you might be a teen. Just remember you are going thru a hormonal hell -- just like the trest of us. Hang in there. It will get easier.
Back to being bisexual, you may not realize it now, but you will have a much larger number of people to date. Just be honest with yourself and future partners.
2007-09-08 04:05:04 · answer #8 · answered by reme_1 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You'll need to re-adjust to your new situation whether you like it or not.
Brushing it under the carpet and trying to ignore it will not work. Try coming to terms with it.
Don't let anyone pressurise you into telling anyone.
2007-09-08 05:54:45 · answer #9 · answered by StretfordEnder 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to build confidence. It'll take you a while to accept yourself, just give it some time. Nobody accepts theirself right away.
2007-09-08 09:59:38 · answer #10 · answered by ☼ kayla ☼ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋