I need to clear up a few things because most of you are saying I need to stay out of it and he needs to grow a back bone. Ok they got married because she got pregnant and his dad told him it was the right thing to do. Then got divorced 4 years later. She left him for another woman, and told him to get out. Then a year later said she wanted him to move back so he could be with both of them. In the paper work she has soul phyisical custody and he can see them when she says so. We ask all the time for them but she says later later later. We pay child support every month on time, she calls wanting more and says she can't afford something so he needs to help. She moved here for 6 months then moved away because she does not like it here (oh and we paid for them all to move here, even the girlfriend, they also lived with us for a month until they found a place) I have been more than nice. He does have a back bone and he loves his kids, she also says I am to young to help raise them. Now what
2007-09-07 16:25:58 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Your husband needs to get a lawyer and fight for shared custody, and child support decided by the court and written down on record. Once he has shared custody she cannot deny him seeing the children. She also cannot demand more money than the court has decided.
2007-09-07 18:45:52 · answer #1 · answered by missmuffin 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok I know he loves his kids but he needs to see that she's going to always ask for $. He is the father of her children not an ATM. He has to learn how to say no sometime. If the kids need something, like his daughter want to take swiming lessons tell his ex to send him the name of the place where she wants to get the lessons and pay them directly. Do not give her any more money but the required child support. If she doesn't like that then he can try to use it as a barganin chip in getting to see his kids more often. If she says the can come visit and you buy plane tickets but she doesn't put them on the plane but still asks for money. tell her you put out a lot of money for the tickets, taking off from work to spend time with the kids and all the stuff you bought for the kids for when they were to be there, and now you don't have any extra. He loves his kids and she knows and she will use this to HER benefit not the childrens!
2007-09-07 23:55:29 · answer #2 · answered by blksista2 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would try to get custody of the child/ren--it doesn't seem that there's much stability in all of this especially if the two of you paid for the move and let all of them live with you.
See an Attorney and see what you can do.
I hate my ex-husbands wife--did the first time I met her and that was before our divorce--still do--I can be nice--she can't and my son is getting married in 3 weeks.
Do what's best for the kids and yourselves.
2007-09-07 23:34:58 · answer #3 · answered by Mignon F 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Call a lawyer. It is the only way to protect the kids from all of the madness. My question would be why she got sole physical custody of the kids given the situation that she left him and for a same sex partner. That is unusual. Why wasn't he considered? it seems there is more that has not been shared here.
2007-09-07 23:32:49 · answer #4 · answered by Tibbar 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
dont stop at visitatoin go all the way and if hes paying support then he has a right to see them and it dosent matter how old you are back in the years and even now there are 11 12 13 14 15 year old girls and guys taking care of children and they do a good job at it so guessing you are at least in your 20's i think youll be a fine mother
2007-09-07 23:46:52 · answer #5 · answered by Meg 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's none of her buisiness who he is with and how old you are. She cannot continue trying to control his life after she has gone on with her own. She is the one who left and he needs to take her to court to get more visitation or custody rights. Let the courts decide this one. She sounds like a flake.
2007-09-07 23:31:46 · answer #6 · answered by marie s 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He shouldn't have allowed her to "tell him when he can see the kids". It is hard to get sole custody. I got sole custody because my ex was stalking me, is an alcoholic, a drug addict, 2 DUI's, unstable...etc. He had to of done something pretty bad to not even get joint custody.
If he is on the straight and narrow, then he needs to take her back to court.
You fighting with her or telling her how you really feel will only make it worse and harder for him to see his children.
Good luck.
2007-09-07 23:31:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
He needs to go back to court and get ordered visitation. You need to tell her off. He is your husband therefore it's your business, some states will let your husband have custody because she is gay. If the kids need something send the the item not money!
2007-09-07 23:32:41 · answer #8 · answered by Mark and Allie 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
He needs to seek legal advise so he can get at least 50% custody. She is holding the child as ransom.
2007-09-08 00:06:22 · answer #9 · answered by pussycat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your husband needs to take his ex back to court to get more reasonable visitation...a schedule needs to be set. The ex cannot deny specific visitation.
As for him paying for everything, he just needs to say "no". If he's paying court ordered child support, then he's doing his part.
2007-09-07 23:31:57 · answer #10 · answered by Royalhinney 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋