When a man closes his eyes to get an erection does this mean he is fantasizing about something else? This hasn't happened to me directly (although other things have). But, a friend of mine is torn. Her husband wants her to jerk him off while he hides his face in a pillow and shuts his eyes. Then when he is ready they do the deed without any foreplay for her. And within minutes its over.
She tells me that this is how sex goes 99% of the time. Can anyone shed some light on this matter?
btw, she is a model and has worked for Gap/Banana Republic, she's beautiful.
2007-09-07 10:31:48 · 11 answers · asked by lalalalalala 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
She met him in college, we all met at the same time. They have been together for 12 years and yes, she has told him time and time again what she needs in bed. He won't tell her she's hot but he stares and gawks at others when they go out. All of her girlfriends constantly tell her how I have dated a guy like this and it was kindof miserable.
She is here with me and thanks for the advice.
oh, btw. she has found tons of straight porn so it's may not be because he is gay. maybe he is thinking of the porn.
anyway, thanks guys.
2007-09-07 11:07:40 · update #1
Sometimes closing the eyes is not to fantasize about others but rather to concentrate on the sensation. But if he is not offering pleasure to her, he sounds like a selfish bastard and their relationship is heading in the wrong way.
2007-09-07 10:39:18 · answer #1 · answered by Big D 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think one of 2 things is going on here.....
Possibility #1 (and most likely) - Yes - he's thinking of someone else besides her. Or, he's got ED and needs sensory deprivation to "concentrate" on getting his willy to perform.
Possibility #2 - If she's truely as attractive as you say (model, etc...) then maybe, just maybe he has the other problem (hair trigger). And that by looking at her naked body, he can't help but pop off too early, so to hide in the pillow and make her perform the hand dance to make him errect is the only way he can do it and still perform without just leaving her with a palm full of hand lotion.
That would certainly explain why he doesn't last very long once they get to the big deed as well.
Bottom line - THEY need to talk about it. Sounds like he has some type of performance issue and she's not getting what she needs. They can either talk and work it out together, or e-mail me her phone number (just kidding) once the relationship crumbles to the ground - because it eventually will !
Best of luck to you.
2007-09-07 18:09:05 · answer #2 · answered by aa889d 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
And how was it before?
Maybe is this a new fad because he miss the Bananas/Jungle?
Is she jealous of that,or of fantasies?
Or of not telling him hers?
You know more of her intimacy,than he is let to.Why?
Ah,and men don't need to close eyes to get an erection.It happens too without eye,hand,air,etc. "tricks".
Tell her to imagine herself being the pillow,if the hand touch isn't suggestive enough for her.
2007-09-07 17:44:11 · answer #3 · answered by Lucy,I'm honry! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The next time he wants this kind of sex say no. Why? Cause for play and sex should be for both parties to enjoy. That is what she to stress to him .Or he just don't get none.
2007-09-07 17:40:26 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either [a] he has trouble focusing and is self-conscious or
[b] he is daydreaming it's Ted Danson yanking him off.
I go with [b] , and it makes my skin crawl just reading what he has to do to get wood with a beautiful woman in the room.
2007-09-07 18:08:53 · answer #5 · answered by filthy_crumb 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know where your friend found this man she is married to...but if this is how sex goes 99% of the time....she is married to a selfish pig! Most likely he is fantasizng about someone else.
2007-09-07 17:37:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
The only reason it happens 90% of the time is because she lets it! Tell her to speak up for what she wants sexually, it seems that he has no problem asking for what he wants.
2007-09-07 17:36:48 · answer #7 · answered by Elt 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
A hot model wife...I would be looking at her for sure...He has issues if you ask me.
2007-09-07 17:38:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
lalalalalala, My dear that dude has a problem ! Tell your friend that I am so very sorry cause he does not deserve her !
2007-09-07 18:02:38 · answer #9 · answered by lonewolf 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
maybe he is just gay
2007-09-07 17:43:08 · answer #10 · answered by tito 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋