My husbands father, *Dan, was an alcoholic since he was 16 years old. I believe *Kathy, my husbands mother, knew this when they got together, which was around that age. They had finally gotten married a few years after my husband was born. In 2000, they had gotten separated and were in the works of getting a divorce. Kathy had moved out and was starting to see other people.
Dan died in 2001 and Kathy had gotten everything, house, life insurance, personal items, etc. She is now living in this house with her new husband and their child.
I was wondering if this was fair. Why should she get everything of his when they were talking about divorce and if he hadn't had died, the divorce would have went through.
2007-09-07 09:59:14 · 17 answers · asked by ♥KottonKandie♥ 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is a really tough question. If 'dan' had had a will set in place...this most likely would not have happened. I'm sorry for your husband's (and your) position. I'm sure, if you were willing, you could disbute this in court.
On the other hand, I'm a widow myself. My husband I were seperated, and filling papers, when he passed away. I would have been left a 21 yr old single mom of two, with no help. If it weren't for the fact that the same 'type' of thing had happened to me, I don't know where I'd be now. In my eyes, after putting up with his addictions, and supporting him and his habits while he was alive, I deserved something for the life I had to live while I watched him destroy his own.
Best wishes my dear. I hope that your husband and 'Kathy' can work out their differences. God bless you both.
2007-09-07 10:25:45 · answer #1 · answered by Skycam24 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweet Pea I think it is fair. Is it ethical, no. The law doesn't see it that way. They were still legally married in the eyes of the law no matter what their living arrangements were. Lord for bids this from happening but I am only trying to make a point, say if your hubbie died and you were separated and they awarded you with everything, would you take it? Good luck!
2007-09-07 10:10:05 · answer #2 · answered by b n real 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well Dan was probably aware of that law, so he couldn't have been too fussed about where his assets were going to go, or he'd have made a will. My parents were seperated for 8 years before they divorced, and as far as I know, Dad still hasn't bothered making a will! While it isn't "fair" that Kathy got everything, it's hardly her fault Dan was too lazy (or preoccupied) to make a will. Morally she ought to have passed it on to Dan's kids, but it's pretty silly to count on people having morals...
2007-09-07 10:07:53 · answer #3 · answered by Rosie_0801 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You may not see it as fair, however it's legal. Guess ol Dan should have gotten Kathy off the will, off the insurance as beneficiary and off the house deed while he was looking into the divorce thing.
2007-09-07 10:07:37 · answer #4 · answered by Elt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It isn't about what is fair. It's about the law. The law says that married couples share their assets 50/50. If they were still legally married, then the law still applies.
I think that rather than questioning the fairness of a law, you should use your resources to go out and change the law. We are a government for the people and BY the people. If you think it's wrong, go change it!
2007-09-07 10:03:38 · answer #5 · answered by Brian V 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If may not seem fair but it is legal. Happens all the time even if he was living with some else for years and died his wife would get everything. That is the law.
2007-09-07 10:09:10 · answer #6 · answered by moonchild 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
According to the law, if they weren't divorced and it was a community property state, then it's hers now that he's gone.
That's why it's REALLY important to make sure you complete ALL your transactions properly, no matter what they may be.
Morally, it might not seem right to us, but that's too bad. Life's not always fair.
2007-09-07 10:08:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
until the divorce is finalized you are still married...the marital assets are still being negotiated...so yeah its fair. If Dan hadn't paid her her share of the equity in the home then it should go back to her.
2007-09-07 10:04:26 · answer #8 · answered by gypsy g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
paper proves everything. I wonder if they have a marriage license???? if they do then yep everything goes to her ---unless there are other written agreements. They never got a divorce so technically they're consider married. people just gotta get their things done right!!!!
2007-09-07 10:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by lm23 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would have changed the will immediately. Your husband can fight it. He can prove that she doesn't deserve it because they were separated and about to divorce and that she was with another man.
2007-09-07 10:04:09 · answer #10 · answered by RedRabbit 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋