Are these MEN RULES true? Becuase if they are.. I think I can live with them!..lol?

Question

The Man Rules-------------------
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down



We always hear " the rules"
From the female side.



Now here are the rules from the male side.


These are our rules!
Please note.. these are all numbered "1 "
ON PURPOSE!



1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports It's like the full moon
or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every
question.

1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
That's what we do.
Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.


1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.

In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.


1. If you think you're fat, you probably are.
Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of
the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one

1. You can either ask us to do something
Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both.
If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials..

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do
we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a
fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will be scratched.
We do that .

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act
like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an
answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is
fine... Really .

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are
prepared to discuss such topics as baseball
or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight;


But did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

Answer 1

I didn't feel like reading that, it's waaaaaaaaaay to long.

Answer 2

Weird. None of rules you stated are man rules.
These however are: and men will probably get mad at me for revealing them.
1. never rat on another man for cheating unless it is with one of your women.
2. never date another friends former girlfriend if they broke up less than a year ago, without first talking to him about it. If she dumped him. Add an extra year. If you saw him crying about her dumping him add another year. If she is really hot, like at least a 9 ignore rule 2, other men will understand.
3. never tell confidential man information to any other women especially spouses, and girlfriends, this includes but is not limited to what they saw,did, or didn't do at a bachelor party/bar/stripclub and so on.
4. never crash a man night by bringing along your woman unless she is really cool, I mean really cool like she will go and try to pick up chicks for your other friends when you are at the bar, I mean cool like she doesn't get offended by anything and she can be trusted to never reveal man info to other women. While in presence of said "cool" woman rule number 3 is slightly relaxed, but never ever is rule 1 relaxed.

Answer 3

OH MY GOD!!!!! Only A man could have written this because it is SOOOO true. In fact I am about to make my wife read this right now.

Answer 4

You forgot one ~ 34 ~ the television controls will continuously be the valuables of the guy of the living house .......... so he can channel surf for the period of categorised advertisements .............. ***grrrr*** ....... therein lies ninety 9% of the reason i don't do television ....... ;0) Thanx mate, that replaced into extremely exciting. CHEERS ?

Answer 5

Its about time...and I agree tenfold

Answer 6

LOL

There is an awful lot of truth there...

Answer 7

yup

Answer 8

hahahahahahaha!
cute

Answer 9

i can clearly see that you don't have a life. you took time to write all these down. what a loser.
why do girls whine and complain all the time.

Answer 10

haha!