We have been together for over 3 years now. He has 2 children, his son lives in PR & he has joint custody with his daughter. I dont get to see my son to much cuz of the distance between his father and I. We have no children together. So basically we do not have any children in the house. I am 24 and he is 32 so our opinions are a little different when it comes to children. We tried to have a baby last year but I wound up with Thyroid Cancer and of course thatr needed to be taken care of first. Everything is back to normal and I just do not know how to bring up that I am ready to have a child with him.
2007-09-07 07:56:28 · 18 answers · asked by bebegurl 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
For the guy who said something about custody - The situation with my sons father and I has nothing to do with wanting to have a child with my husband.
I was really young when I had my son and the father was older and his parents helped him out a great deal. I did what was in the best interest of my son. It became about him and not what I wanted. I still see him and am apart of his life, he just doesnt live with me.
Once again that has nothing to do with wanting to have a child with my husband.
2007-09-07 08:19:35 · update #1
I am on birth control and never had I even thought of just stopping my pills and not letting him know. Sadly enough that is the reason his daughter is here.
2007-09-07 08:24:23 · update #2
You: "Honey, I want for us to have a baby, what do you think?"
He'll either say yes or no -- but as long as you talk about it, that's all that matters!
2007-09-07 08:04:09 · answer #1 · answered by dr_nigel_c 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't trick your husband hon.... that brings nothing but rage and resentment.... Every child deserves to be wanted and planned for --- by BOTH parents. It is a joint decision, and it is unfair to any child if you do not... So, screw up the courage to have the discussion if it is a child that you want.... make your wishes known
"John, I want to have a baby, pure and simple....but I respect our love for each other too much to simply stop taking the pill. I need your thoughts..." And go from there....
If having children for him is the dealbuster, then you need to decide if it is the deal buster for you as well. If you wish a child more than you wish to remain in this marriage, then both of you need to know this... Tho your clock isn't ticking very fast, it is ticking if you wish to have a more or less uncomplicated pregnancy, and for sure if you wish to find someone else, should he say, "no way".
2007-09-07 08:14:06 · answer #2 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him you have children , but I have none and I'd like a child with you, maybe he feels that you aren't quite up to it after your problem. Just tell him lets stop using birth control and see if we can get pregnant, you never will know unless you ask him. If you want and your on some kind of birth control just stop taking it, that is your body. I knew a girl that had thyroid taken out , she told me she couldn't take any form of birth control pills and that Doctor advised against getting pregnant . Just ask you your doctor first if having a baby would hurt you in anyway if not then give it a try.
2007-09-07 08:11:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're only 24 and he's only 32. You both have kids from previous relationship, so why not enjoy the company of each other first 3 years is not that long.
Kids will just put a strain to both of you now, if you had one. Just enjoy the benefits of not having one right now in your house.
2007-09-07 08:06:58 · answer #4 · answered by Binibini 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him. Why is it so hard for women to just come out and say something to a man? We don't take hints and we aren't good at reading between the lines. If you want us to know something then you have to tell us flat out. You don't have to be argumentative or accusatory with what you are saying but just say, "Honey, I was wondering what you would think about us having a baby?" That is all, and then he will let you know one way or another. I don't guarantee that you will like the answer, but at least you will know where you stand.
2007-09-07 08:32:20 · answer #5 · answered by No one 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just say hey honey...I want to talk to you about something...now that we've overcome the thyroid cancer issue I'd really like to try to have a baby again...there ..you have it out there and it's then open for discussion! Good luck....I don't think it's going to be a problem!!
2007-09-07 08:06:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to just ask him how he would feel about you 2 have a child together. If he tells you no, ask him his reasons on that. Maybe its something you can work through with him. He may just surprise you and say yes, i mean you guys did try a few years ago, i assume he had no problem with it then. So just ask him.
2007-09-07 08:05:09 · answer #7 · answered by babygurl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The same way you explained in the body of your question is pretty straight forward. Tell him would be nice to have a little one around the house. You also have to make you sure he's ready to be a full-time father.
2007-09-07 08:11:27 · answer #8 · answered by Rafa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweet Pea just talk to him and let him know this is really what your heart desires. Having a baby is the most beautiful thing that happens in a woman's life. Just let him know you want to add to the family. Good Luck!
2007-09-07 08:06:23 · answer #9 · answered by b n real 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him and then discuss it. If he was receptive last year he probably will be receptive this year.
Whatever you do, DO NOT trick him. That destroys trust and he will think about that every time he looks at your child for at least the first year or so.
2007-09-07 08:08:28 · answer #10 · answered by golfinggoddess 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just go ahead and tell him that you are ready. He will probably have a positive reaction. He sounds like a man who loves children.
2007-09-07 08:04:53 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋