Is my daughters kindergarten teacher "wrong" in doing this?

Question

Hi, after her 2nd day in school, my daughters teacher sent home a note asking me to work on spelling her name and alphabet. I thought to myself "Ok, but this is the 2nd day and there is no prerequisite for children that age to meet a set standard of penmanship before entering kindergarten." So, I replied to her note thanking her for her letter and also asking her if this was a general note to ALL parents or if my daughers handwriting (on the 2nd day of school no less) was not comparable to the others students in some way.

What do you make of this letter and my response? Do you think my reply was necessary? I mean, c'mon!! I'm sending her to school to learn these things not for the teacher to ask me to teach it! (ofcourse I don't mind going over writing w/my daughter but I'm sure you know that's not the point) Thank you everyone for your response.

AbsolutelyEdie - although I appreciate your answer I believe you may have misinterpreted the tone of my question. I have NO problem and enjoy being with and teaching my daughter. But how much evaluating is done after 2 half days of school to merit this note!

Rick46- sounds like you hear alot of rantings from your wife on being a teacher..I believe your response wins the "least helpful and silly to boot" certificate.

Tempest - wow! good for you and your son..children develop academically at different levels, if you find something wrong with my inquiring about my daughter specifically as a response to a letter addressing her then that says more about you than me

Answer 1

I'm really amazed by the divisiveness of some of the responses.

I really don't want to get into what teachers do, what they see, and what they do or don't do (but I got some stories!).

We've learned that school involves the whole family AND the school (principal, AND teachers). I think its always fair and a good thing to ask questions of your children's teachers. I always remind myself that our and the school's goals are the same... that we're on the same team. But if you, as a parent, don't understand the reasoning behind a comment, a homework assignment, whatever.... then its completely appropriate to ask a question.

I do keep in mind that a teacher has a lot of responsibilities to the other students and only call them to task when I absolutely need to (part of the above mentioned stories).

My point is stay involved, ask questions!

Good luck with it all :)

Best Regards

Answer 2

Well I know In upstate New York my daughter had to beable to write her name before she went to Kindergarten. Thats why I sent her to preschool and I did alot of writing at home. The preschool teacher pretty much was my helping hand so that I knew what was expected in Kindergarten. They have changed the cirrclum so much that I was not sure and no the teacher really was not wrong maybe she felt that she was giving a heads up and who knows it very well could of been a general note. All I can really say is don't get rude with the teacher till you honestly know the whole story no I am not a teacher but if you do not have any experience in education or know what the state expects then your teacher is the go to person I am sorry but do not over react and be rude cuz the teacher might be iffy to go to you if she finds other issues threw out the year. Also just fyi if you do find your daughter having problems catching onto things they sell duifferent workbooks that concentrate on certain areas you can get them at wal-mart I heard you can get them at the dollar store too but I am not sure

Answer 3

Who cares if it was a general note or one only directed at your daughter. It's your child's education. What if it IS only directed to your daughter, does that many any difference? Kids enter kindergarten with different skill sets. She is just pointing out something that your daughter needs extra work on. I have a 5 year old that just started kindergarten. At parents night the teacher showed us a packet that would come home every week for homework. The packet is 2 pages and includes practicing writing letters, name, address and a few simple words. This is how it's done. The teacher teaches basic concepts and we get to help our kids practice at home. It's really no big deal. Kindergarteners need lots of one on one and the school day is too short for the teacher to really practice with each and every one of them. I don't' think I would have written a note, just worked with my child. Good luck :)

Answer 4

My parents got a note like that when I was in pre-kindergarden. Do you know why? Well, it's very hard for a three, four or five year old child to teach herself how to read and write. Yes, some children with a ridiculous amount of genius teach themselves, but let's be realistic here. I did teach myself some words, but I was very frustrated. I was also a very nervous often embarassed child and I wanted to learn desperately, but could not. I'd tell my teacher things I'd never let my parents know about and one was that I desperately wanted to read. Of course, a pre-kindergarten teacher doesn't have the time or the job to teach 3 and 4 year olds how to read, so I got that note.

I think the tone of your reply and question is a bit defensive. I think it's okay because you are the child's mother and you will be that way, but no, I don't think it was necessarry. Your daughters teacher may be writing this note because she's a bright child who has shown interest in literacy.

I think you should ask your daughter if she wants to learn these things. I remember so often I would beg my father to teach me to read and write. I wanted to know what everyone was in on that I wasn't!

Don't pressure her yet, even if the note suggests such things, but why not go over some things or ask her how much she wants to know what those silly symbols that everyone else knows mean!

Answer 5

♥ I dont think the teacher is wrong. The teacher should be teaching the child the alphabet and letters in school and then you should be reiterating it at home while she does her homework. They do go to school to learn, but sometimes the child learns better when a parent sits down with them after school to let them show what they learned and to help with things they are having trouble with. If you are concerned that the teacher may have been pinpointing your daughter simply ask for a parent/teacher conference that way you can speak with her directly. Good Luck!

Answer 6

I think that you are over-reacting and shouldn't be concerned who is being targeted by this note. Your concern is your own child. Most informed parents are aware that children going into kindergarten are already expected to be able to write their name, be able to explain opposites, understand some VERY basic math, etc. Times are different and there are expectations of parents - don't leave your job to the teachers. Please contact the school district and ask for a copy of their guidelines of what is expected before your child goes into Kindergarten. You may ultimately want to sit down with her teacher and ask if he/she feels that your child would benefit from waiting until next year for Kindergarten & if she says yes, ask what YOU can do to prepare her. Listening to the teacher would benefit you - they are the professionals and your child is not the first child they have ever taught. A lot of kids are waiting a year (I did with mine) because they just aren't ready. Doesn't mean they aren't smart, just not there yet. Starting her schooling with a "not my child" or "why isn't the TEACHER....." attitude will not help your child. Drop the ego and do the best job you can to help her.
One more note about waiting a year - I know a lot of people who have done it - particularly with children who have later birthdays and are the younger ones in class. I have yet to hear of anyone who regretted the decision. My child is actually ahead of the others as a result of waiting.

Answer 7

I think it was a pretty standard letter from a teacher. Ive got 3 kids and have found that some teachers like a lot of parent/teacher interaction esp. at the start of the year. Nothing wrong with your reply. It sounds polite enough. Sounds like the name and alphabet thing are kind of like "homework". Kindergarten teachers sometimes like to get the kiddos used to the idea of doing homework but of course they need parental help with it. I dont think the teachers letter or yours were out of line. :)

Answer 8

Teachers are very valuable people in our society. I am sure your little girl teacher meant no harm. The teacher has evidently been in her position for a long time and is aware of many things when it comes to child development. She may have recognized something in your child that she may feel needs addressing and was making you aware of it. I would appreciate if my child's instructor made me aware of things I may need to work with my children on. I feel she was merely doing her job. You wants the best for your child and seems she is trying to help your child to be more productive. I was not aware of all the techniques it took to be a teacher until I began substituting. I felt I was going to go in and follow lesson plans and make a days pay. It is not that simple. Teachers have to be parents to our children, social workers, dealing with many personalities, constantly changing teaching tactics so that every child can comprehend, etc... I know we don't like to hear someone tell us about our children, but sometimes we have to listen. We don't have to feel that someone is telling us we are not good parents. She was just recognizing your child's potential and is trying to accentuate it. I am pretty sure you are a great parent. I really don't think she meant any harm.

Answer 9

Your letter is excellent.

I would actually hope that the letter was specifically for your daughter. This would mean that her teacher is concerned about your daughter's development. This would be a very good thing.

If the letter is just general, I would be more disappointed.

I ask my son's teachers if there is anything that we need to work on at home all the time. Yes, even after the first day!!

However, I understand your concern that penmanship isn't as important as behaviour at her age. But remember, it's just a suggestion. They are trying to help your daughter.

Answer 10

I don't think your teacher was wrong at all...I did the same for my children when they were your daughter's age. Parent's should be involved with what their children are learning. I think your reply to the teacher wasn't necessary. Why would you care where she stood with the rest of the students? After all you seem to think it is the responsibility of the teacher to teach her to write.....if you really wanted to know how your daughter is doing in school...you should have called the teacher.