Scream.......no seriously.............you need to gain control and there are so many different ways to deal with anger. For some, it is relaxation and breathing exercises (i.e. yoga) For others, reading may be a good choice as well as taking a long walk, watching the ocean waves and listening to the soothing sounds. I use a sound machine and set it on the "ocean" to go to sleep eveynight.
When you get angry and before you say something you don't mean or will regret, take a step back, take some deep breaths and don't answer anyone back until you have calmed down and can sit down and talk about it rationally and calmly.
Let your mind go to a place that is serene or a pleasant experience you may have had.
Many times it is the way something is said to us or the way we say something.......that gets us into a rage.
Personally, I like to go fishing as it calms me and I sleep like a baby. I also think sports are very healthy for anger. I played volleyball for over 30 years and it was a happy thing and was calming and yet exciting to me. I also think about my darling grandkids. When I am really angry. I get the heavy bag out and just box away. That will take everything out of you and leave you spent, so you have no anger left in you.
I have learned through my years of experience is to refuse to be a part of a confrontation. I simple say to someone, "I am not yelling at you. Why are you yelling at me?" It works for me. It stops the other person dead in their tracks, until you can get over the anger and talk about it.
So many small things in life really make us mad and usually it is always just a small part of the real problem. Nip it in the bud as they say and talk about what is really bothering you. (the overall picture) Women are really good at talking to their sister or girlfriends and getting things off your chest. You don't want to take out anger on someone who is just in the line of fire. Most men don't want to talk it over. They either ignore it, making a woman madder, get drunk or totally shut down on you.
I don't know how bad the anger problem is, but I would ask myself............Is it worth it? Anger affects you emotionally and physically. There are such varying degrees of anger too. If one is raging anger, then seek professional help.
Much of anger also depends on your age,your maturity, how you were raised or what may have happened when you were growing up and what you learned from your parents. Take that exercise class, take the time for yourself, pamper yourself and if you must......hit that pillow as hard as you can! If you are in an intolerable situation and are unhappy. Change it!
2007-09-06 20:50:09
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answer #1
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answered by Anonymous
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There was a study done once that suggests that it is psychologically more advantageous to take a deep breath and count to ten than to do anything else (i.e. hit a pillow or scream a curse word, for example.)
The study took two groups of people and gave them an assignment to write an essay. No matter how well they did, the "graders" (scientists) gave them terrible marks and bashed them hard on their papers for their "stupidity".
Half of the group was told to let their anger out on pillows, and the other to simply count to ten.
This accomplished, the essay writers were then told to spoon out an amount of salsa into a bowl, and were told that the "graders" would have to eat all of it.
The pillow-punchers gave obscene amounts of salsa to the "graders" while the counters/breathers gave very little, if any at all.
Interesting. Here is a link to a paper on a similar study:
http://www.apa.org/journals/features/psp886969.pdf
So I just count to ten.
Hope this helps!
2007-09-06 20:28:35
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answer #2
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answered by p37ry 5
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1 Give Yourself Permission to Express Anger.
(and never without it)
2 Combine Mental and Physical Effort.
3 Never Hurt Others in the Process.
4 Totally Let Go, Without Hesitation.
5 Strive to Forgive.
http://www.soundfeelings.com/free/anger.htm
http://www.search.com/search?q=how+to+control+anger
http://www.answers.com/how%20to%20control%20anger
Forgiveness is Better Than Revenge
comes from a quotation by the third-century author Diogenes Laërtius.
http://www.forgivenessweb.com/RdgRm/Quotationpage.html
http://htmlgear.tripod.com/text/control.text?u=cutemple2&i=1&a=render&style=list
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Forgiveness
2007-09-06 21:22:11
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answer #3
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answered by d_r_siva 7
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I am explode and release. I'll get angry go with it and deal with the issue and five minuets later you would never know I was angry about anything. The key for me is not to own it or keep it for more than that moment. I do not dwell on anger I let go and I can stay at peace with myself.
2007-09-06 20:39:19
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answer #4
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answered by nad32h 3
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I control it up to a point..
then i loose it but still not as bad as some people. I start off very social, then i start getting louder as the person just doesn't seem to get what i am trying to explain and they are shifting the problem on to me. so as the time goes, i just get louder and louder and walk away, because i don't like to yell or talk loud. It is like an unexpected storm coming in....then it leaves us.
2007-09-06 21:03:45
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answer #5
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answered by ttwobearsplusone 3
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count from 1 to 10
2007-09-06 22:04:55
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answer #6
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answered by HolyWars 3
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I agree with julius
If I don't walk away I will blow up. I have anger problems and that is the only thing that works. Also you HAVE to vent it, like going to the gym or something.
2007-09-06 20:26:47
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answer #7
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answered by Rock L 2
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In the moment: I walk away. There is no other solution for me, if I don't, I will **** up the target.
Long-term: I go nuts at the gym! (which is a bad thing for those foolish enough to not let me walk away...)
2007-09-06 20:23:05
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answer #8
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answered by Anonymous
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walk away. go back later when i can talk calmly and rationally. or i self talk like... "it is not worth my time to get angry over this...."
2007-09-07 03:13:50
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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Weed. Lots and lots of weed.
2007-09-06 20:44:04
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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