sorry this is so long but,
well i am 26 weeks pregnant and i am thinking about havinf my tubes tied after this baby. This is #3 for us and i would love to have a boy but my husband will not helpl out with tthe kids. I know he loves them and all but as far as like changing diapers, giving baths and all he WILL NOT help. he loves taking them places like fishing and all but i don;t know what to do. i have 2 beautiful girls and a 3rd on the way. i am happy to have my kids but i just feel like a single parent some times. is it just me over reacting becasue of pregnancy or is anyone else feeling this way. i want to have my tubes tied my husband doesn't want me to and i am afreaid that if i have them tied he'll hate me for it.
2007-09-06 16:09:35 · 9 answers · asked by dixiedarlin 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
Well, there's a couple points I'd like to make here. I'm a single mom, never married, 34, and you know as well as I do that the diapers phase lasts 3 years tops. I don't know how old your kids are but mine are 17,14 and 8. The time they spend in diapers is very short. And after that, they only demand more of not only your physical energy but your mental energy as well. Their questions and needs get harder to answer. Maybe you don't have to wake up many times a night for them; now you get to sit up nights worrying instead!
So the first point is this: if he's willing to take the kids out to play, that's GREAT!! Enjoy it as long as he's willing to do it! You have no idea how much you can come to appreciate this, that is, assuming you get to stay home....hmmm. If you have to go too, then I sincerely sympathize!
And about the tubes tying thing...why is he so against you getting them tied? This can only be because he wants another baby, maybe not NOW, but definately at SOME point. And that door is closed, but only with YOU, if you get it done, he'll find someone whose door is wide open.
The surgery itself is a lot more complicated than his, yours would require a hospital stay, and his is just a doctors visit.
But push comes to shove, it's undeniable he wants children, and so my advise is this: Go on the pill. It's good for keeping you regular, you can skip a period if you need/want to, and he'll feel assured the possibility of proving his manhood is still there. Plus, having your tubes tied makes the onset of menopause come sooner.
It won't hurt you to NOT have them tied, but it might hurt your marriage if you DO. But unless he says he wants another baby RIGHT NOW, he's just more comfortable knowing his boys are still fighting a battle that isn't ALWAYS losing!
Men and their egos! They're always good for a laugh!
You could suggest condoms to him, but let me guess! No way! Yeah, I know!
2007-09-06 16:55:24 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well, I'll give you the same advice that I gave my sis-n-law. You need to get an IUD. That way it's not permanent. Don't tell your husband about it. He won't know the difference. Men always want you to keep popping out baby's until they get a son (This is why I have 3 kids), but some of them don't want to put in the work. Taking them places is the fun part.
2007-09-06 17:38:04 · answer #2 · answered by lawstudntbynite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Please do no longer panic.you will settle for slightly injection and with in seconds you would be asleep.you will no longer understand no longer something till long after the anesthetic wears off.After which you're able to have slightly soreness yet you ought to be dosed up with some soreness alleviation.this is an argument of taking issues actual effortless for afew days or so and additionally you haven't any longer something to rigidity approximately.you would be in super palms.I choose you properly.Please clarify to the staff once you arrive on the wellness center how fearful you're and that they may be waiting that can assist you you .
2016-12-16 13:34:13 · answer #3 · answered by deparvine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had a negative experience when I got my tubes tied. It hurt for weeks. I recomend the IUC. They do it right in the doctor's office and you can take it out if need be. It's good for five years. You can decide what to do from there. As far as the not helping thing goes, It's a man thing. Good luck.
2007-09-06 16:26:01 · answer #4 · answered by devenfrost 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Get an IUD (intra-uterine device). It is inserted in one visit to the gynecologist. It is undetectable, and can be removed anytime you decide you want to conceive, with NO side effects. It is good for 10 years. I got one after my second child and I think it was one of the best decisions I made. And it was covered 100% by my insurance company.
2007-09-06 16:23:18 · answer #5 · answered by Christine 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My suggestion would be to have your husband's tubes tied. His recovery time is much faster than yours would be and it is reversible. You should not have to sacrifice your body. You've done it four times over. It's his turn now. Good luck in whatever you decide.
2007-09-06 16:18:56 · answer #6 · answered by ladyhawk_1998 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I have a 4 yr old girl and I'm 28 weeks preggo, and Imma have mine tied. I can't wait.
I'm a single parent.
2007-09-06 16:18:45 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe try a reversable long term birth control, like depo or an IUD. AS your girls get older you may find that there is room in your family for one more, or you may make the decision that you have had all your babies!!
2007-09-06 16:21:24 · answer #8 · answered by parental unit 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
why dont you go with the Marina IUD for now? It can last 5 years!! That will give you plenty of time to sort things out.
if you're not 100000% sure about it, dont do it!!!
.
2007-09-06 16:22:08 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋