My parents went through a nasty divorce when i was 5 and i blocked everything out so i really dont remember to much. But growing up i always heard my mom talk about what happend but never ever my dad. The other day i asked my dad what happend and he told me his side of the story. My moms side of the story was that my dad bought another mans wife a car and not her, this other mans wife just happens to be my moms brothers wife. And apparently thats why my mom left my dad. My dad told me that he found my step dads card in her purse and around the time he found that he said my mom used to get all ready to go to work and she would come home and be in a bitchy mood and one day my dad offered to take my mom down and buy her a car and my mom said she didnt want anything from him well he than took that money and just bought his brother in law's wife the car and thats when my mom left him. I didnt tell my mom what my dad said but i wonder if it was my mom all along ?
2007-09-06 15:21:20 · 9 answers · asked by mommyandbaby 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
And after finding out that little bit of detail i am really curious. I do have a great relationship with my mother and i do want to know why everything happend the way it did and at this point i dont feel that comfortable talking to her about it cause she always puts my father down. And if she has been lying all these years i wonder if i am going to need therapy because it is 16 long years and still going and whatever the mistake was that happend with there marriage i dont want it to happen with my marriage. I also wonder if my stepdad was the cause of all this ? And if so why am i still being lied to ? please give me some ideas or opinions thanks so much..
2007-09-06 15:24:55 · update #1
I wish it could stay in the past but this **** was brought up two days ago from my mom and i want to know if she is still lying to me to this day shouldnt i be entiltled to know if my mother is lying to me ? and this is not just there past but all of us children still live in it today my parents hate each other and they have no problem expressing it. And if i at least find out it would solve my 16 year mystery this is something i want to accomplish for myself and i deserve to know after all they are the ones who put me through hell and back and stuck me in there nonsense. Nonsense that is still affecting our lifes {me and my sibilings}
2007-09-06 16:07:44 · update #2
Everyone has their own version of the truth... and if they tell it often enough, even they believe it. My point is - neither of them AND both of them are telling the truth as they remember it and believe it. Honestly - it's their story. Try not to make it yours - you are a grown woman and need to get past it.
2007-09-06 15:29:41 · answer #1 · answered by kelannde 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Know what? Bottom line is, it doesn't matter nor is it any of your business. I'm not meaning that to sound as blunt as it probably sounds.
What happened between your parents is between them. Each will have their own hurts to deal with. You don't need to get in the middle of the details and 'judge' who was right and who was wrong.
I don't think anyone lied, per se. Each has his/her own version of events, colored by his/her feelings.
Stay out of this. Let it go. You cannot change the past and trying to 'figure it out' will just make you miserable.
Remember that both your parents are human and have human flaws. Recognize that their marriage did not work and that it was NOT YOUR FAULT. And then move on.
2007-09-06 15:30:43 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People tend to say what they need to say in order to make them feel justified, to feel right, to feel good about themselves.
It happened a long time ago. Whatever actually happened to end the marriage doesn't really matter in the long run, anyway. There's no going back. No fixing it. It was going to end anyway & aren't you glad for your parents that it did, so that they could go on to, potentially, find other happiness in their lives.
What really matters in your life is how you were treated every day, what happened to you, how everyone behaved when working together to raise you even though their marriage didn't work out.
2007-09-06 15:58:57 · answer #3 · answered by Maureen 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie, the workings of their marriage has nothing to do with you, so stop grinding away on it and stop trying to sort it out. Parents ought NEVER to share that stuff with their children.... never, not ever. It's none of your business, none of your concern, and none of anything you ought to try to be sorting out as to who said what to whom and when and why and what for what hat card was where and why and who put it there, and who bought what for whom and why not something else.... get it??????... Stupid and silly.
Lead your own life, hon, forget it.... it's trivia. That kind of crap just eats away at you and erodes your soul. Your job is to grow up to be a great lady, and a great wife, mom and lover to a lovely man. Get your education, get a great job and become all you can be. You can change no history. It's gone, done, over...... flush it.
2007-09-06 15:41:00 · answer #4 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There was no reason for your dad to buy a car for his brother in laws wife for one thing. But, what does it matter? It won't change anything. They're still divorced and it's 16 years later. Let it go.
2007-09-06 15:27:29 · answer #5 · answered by Elt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why does any of this matter? it is in the past where it should remain. if you go and dig it all up again, you will be disappointed and you will be hurt. So just leave it be.
Focus on your life now and try to avoid making mistakes. Live your life.
2007-09-06 15:28:04 · answer #6 · answered by box of rain 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's been 16 years, love. Continue blocking it out. What is the point of bringing it all back up again? The only thing you'll do is hurt yourself.
They are your parents. Just continue to love them both. That's all you need to do.
2007-09-06 15:26:13 · answer #7 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Wow...I bet you feel better getting that off your chest.
2007-09-06 15:27:06 · answer #8 · answered by Big Red 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Mind your own business.
2007-09-06 15:27:39 · answer #9 · answered by skunk pie 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋