My wife and I were married 3 months ago. We both have myspace, and I just recently found through a roommate of some guy she likes that they were together and they said they were sleeping together. I confronter her about it, pretty upset but not angry ... dissappointed. She admitted to being there, but nothing happened. Then we talked the next day and they layed together. I was still even more dissappointed, even though. she says she is confused and still has feelings, but its due to them never getting to date and she'd get over it. We talked and things seemed to get better, but then I had to go and ask for more info. Then I find out she brought over wedding cake a day or two after our wedding, and they really do believe they slept together and he was bragging about it. I totally want to work it through, but have no one to talk to and dont want her or my family to be upset with her ... but Im feeling like she just got married due to the size of the wedding. Any opinions appreciated.
2007-09-06 14:35:54 · 10 answers · asked by Danny 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
My definition of "cheating" is "something you have to hide from your partner because they would be upset if they knew about it."
I think that if you really want to work it through, you need to cut off the MySpace accounts and focus on EACH OTHER. Get your relationship straightened out first, and then worry about friendships being brought back into the picture. Because if she's still talking to this guy (that "she likes"? Like "has a crush on" likes??), then there's going to be too much drama around for the two of you to hunker down and focus on your marriage.
2007-09-06 14:42:32 · answer #1 · answered by Nandina (Bunny Slipper Goddess) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like it for sure. She should be with YOU a few days after the wedding on your HONEYMOON, not with some other guy. She sounds young, and unfortunately sounds like she loved the "big wedding". You need to have a serious discussion about this. It's not the END of anything, but it certainly is the BEGINNING, and if you guys can't through this, it wasn't meant to be in the first place. Marriage is based on trust and communication. Without these things, you have nothing. It's good that you want to talk and work it out, I would just start there and see what happens.
2007-09-06 14:45:37 · answer #2 · answered by sdgirljen 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the question is about cuddling in a relationship before marriage as cheating its away of showing affection for someone with out being in sexual relationship. You just found out that before you were married that something was going on with her and some guy this was before the marriage to you right, and sometimes people don't like to see others happy. you talked about it and she bought your wedding cake over to this person bad choice on her part. Now you think they slept together your worried about how her family will feel about this but what about you that is my concern your the injured party. are you in love with her god has away of working things out.
Best of luck
2007-09-06 17:22:22 · answer #3 · answered by mmurray001 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is the hardest and most hurtful thing you will ever go through. Believe me i understand why you are making excuses for your wife you are confused hurt devastated bewildered all rolled up in the pit of your stomach.You need time to think things through without her around because her presence can only make you feel worse then you already do. It comes down to weather or not you can put up with the looks you will be getting from your friends.Loving someone isn't always enough to stay with the person.
2007-09-06 14:57:30 · answer #4 · answered by Teenie 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Im sorry you dealing with this. but all internet chat needs to stop no more contact with the guy. that is cheating no matter how you look at it. you two was getting married and she was with someone else.sounds like she just got married with out the real reson you do that love wanting no one else. if she cant let go of myspace or any other net chat or contact it dont look good . dont hide things will make it worse. talk to each other but dont let it go on to long it will only be more drama and painful.
2007-09-06 14:52:15 · answer #5 · answered by tweettreat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I tihnk shes confused, if its true she loves you, shell try really hard and NEVER do it again, make it claear that was her last chance, it cant ever ever ever happen again....if it does then i dont think she really loves you and is a gold digger or something, but i may be rong if ever does happen again, cause shes still confused. My opinion, give her another chance but make sure shes relaly dedicated now....she should have told u herself about it, cuase she was obviosuly not going to even bring it up and agood realashionship is built on honesty and trust. Tell her that. And if it happens again, you cant deal with a girl who does things like that to you and break it off. It willbe hard but really, u dont deserve to be put through that ****.
2007-09-06 14:42:59 · answer #6 · answered by xox o.live.juice xox 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would love to talk to you about this if you want you can e-mail me. I have a few questions for you. let me start with you did good by asking her about it. Not many people can even do that. But if you can't trust her now and you have only been married for 3 months that's not good. With out TRUST in a relationship there is nothing. Please e-mail me so we can talk more.
2007-09-06 14:46:20 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow. so sad. okay. you need to confront her and tell her once and for all to tell you the truth no matter what. you need to be prepared to either 1) accept her behavior and possible unfaithfulness to you or 2) leave her.
sadly, if she's behaving this way only 3 months into your marriage she most likely will repeat.
just be prepared for what ever might happen. you seem like a good guy and this sucks. sorry.
2007-09-06 14:44:27 · answer #8 · answered by doscooter66 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Listen if you are not happy..then talk to her about it..you need to have open lines of communication if not the marriage is never going to work..you can't be bottling this all up..its going to spill one day and you wouldn't be able to control that spill..now you have a change to talk it out...Have you thought of couples counseling?...I think that counseling is best especially when just married.
Best of luck!
2007-09-06 14:46:06 · answer #9 · answered by BabyPrincess REAL JAMAICAN QUEEN 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, i thought this was going to go in a different direction. Yah, it's a total breach of intamacy. Don't know what to tell ya dude! You got my sympathies!
2007-09-06 14:42:57 · answer #10 · answered by Oprah's Minge 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋