Sisterly/Family love-or just plain cruelty?

Question

Ever since I turned 18, everything has gone to hell and it all has to do with my older sister. I used to live with her, and in turn for me being able to stay, I watched her kids. Welln I went to go visit some of my friends one day who lived about an hour and a half away. I then got a phone call from one of my family members who also lived in the area saying that my sister did not want me to come back-as in ever. So with that being said-where was I supposed to stay? I asked my (who I thought were caring adoptive parents) if I counld stay with them until I could find myself an apartment. Their answer? No. So I asked some of my friends if I could spend the night at their house every now and then. Their answer? Sure-but only when it was convenient for them as well(which was absolutely fine by me). Most of the time tho-I spent living out of my car (in my parents driveway). I recieved an email later, from my sister, saying how shes enjoying laughing in my face because of how miserable I am.

By the way did I mention how I am no longer allowed to see any of my family members thanks to all the lies my sister has spread? My mom says I cant go to any Christmas get togethers, parties, or even birthdays, because I might start more drama. Excuse me...but ah, weren't you the ones who pretty much threw me out in the streets? Im not even allowed in my own old bedroom-more or less in the house! And by the way-how sad is it that my older sister is laughing it all up and is taking such pleasure in makig my life not only miserable, useless, and difficult-but homeless as well.

I no longer am living in my car, I do have my own apartment. No thanks to them though. But its the moral ethics of the fact that family should still stick together and love each other till the end. Which apparently isnt the case as far as their end goes

Answer 1

I'm really sorry that everyone here is jumping on you as well and assuming that you have done something wrong. We don't have the details from you to be able to judge the situation objectively. What I do know is that sometimes everyone jumps to conclusion without considering the facts - it has happened to me - maybe you are honest about things and they don't like to hear the truth? Are you the youngest? at the bottom of the peck order? The best thing you can do is make the best of what you have because believe me people who will turn on you like this are toxic and you don't want them in your life. It will feel like there is an empty hole because you feel they should be there for you. Just don't make the mistake of jumping into relationships with new people in your life until you have had a chance to get to know them properly. It's a sad fact that these days people are often not honest, not loyal and plainly don't care.
Take care and be strong.

Answer 2

Boy, you must be some kind of mean person for no one to want you around. And, I suspect that you think it is all their fault. You didn't do anything to deserve this treatment, did you? You didn't make life miserable for your adoptive parents or your sister, or your so-called friends, either?

Hon, people don't just chunk human beings out on the street for no reason. We're not that gullible. Face it, you need some help in growing up, and being able to live with people in society. You need counseling, now. Call your United Way Office and ask for a referral. There may be a University counseling service or faith based program that will help you for free. In the meantime, get out of your car and find a job; flipping burgers, if necessary!
Good luck. I'm praying for you!

Answer 3

Be real with yourself. You know that you must have done something here to get yourself into such a situation. You have to make a choice. Continue being a loser and spend your life the way you are.....OR start respecting yourself, go to school, get a job, and simply better yourself. You honestly have the world at your fingertips. You can do anything if you set your mind to it. Most people in your situation are just to lazy to do it. Kids would rather party and hang out with their boyfriends. Life is about choices, if you make good ones the rewards will come.

Answer 4

That is absolutely horrible! I don't think you could've done something bad enough for your own family to put you out like that! I'm real sorry to hear that, and so young. You really outta find a girls home or some shelter in the mean time, at least that way you can begin to work and save for an apartment. I really am shocked and my prayers are definitely with you...

Answer 5

You're discussing issues with your sister, your friends, and your family. However, you claim it's all a surprise. Although I can understand that from a superficial standpoint, I more than recognize that everyone is ignoring the elephant in the room.

You are arguing over issues that don't dig deep enough. You are choosing events in your lives that don't address the elphant.

Dig deeper. Push for better answers. You're not getting everything you need.

Answer 6

If you got an e-mail from your sister stating she was "laughing in your face", question yourself, think back, how was your relationship with all these people in the past, including your friends?
I would suggest that you do find a place of your own soon and don't contact anyone, let them contact you. If it's only for baby sitting, politely tell your sister that you have plans.
Don't let yourself become co-dependant on anyone, as it sounds to me that you may have been in the past.

Answer 7

It is possible for you to be happy again! Distance yourself from these people and quickly! My birth family doesn't love me. Once I realized that, I could move on an become happy. Is is possible for you to hire out as a nanny since you have experience with kids? and move away and become a new person? Your parents are not showing you RESPECT by making you sleep in your car in their driveway!

Answer 8

It sounds cruel, but I guess we'd have to know what lead up to this?? I don't know for sure, but I can tell you that I am very sorry, and I wish you the best of luck. The best thing you can do is pick up the pieces and make something of yourself without them, then you will be the one laughing, because you made it on your own, and even though they thought you'd fail, you proved them wrong.

Answer 9

Uh.. that's pretty cruel.
You said that you had adoptive parents?
Well.. REAL pure blooded family is always better than your parents who aren't blood related to you..
Because you're not their Real child.. so then they wouldn't sacrifice any sh*t for you like real family.
and your older sister.. Uh.. wow.
Forgive and forget.. later... lol..
But for now, try finding a job and earn money to get out of that damn car.
Show her that you AREN'T miserable so she doesn't feel more victorious and show her that you can live on your own.. without her or anyone else. that you are independant and strong!

Answer 10

Apparently you aren't telling the whole story - there are reasons your adoptive parents don't want you there, same with your sister....get a grip on reality and get yourself some help for whatever it is that has managed to ruin your relationships with your family.