People were gossiping about....?

Question

my friend. She wasn't at practice today so the whole team broke out into conversation about how she was an awful soccer player and that she doesn't even try. Which was true, but I still didn't feel comfortable about them saying that about her. Then they started gossiping about her personal life with her ex boyfriend and what they did together. Which even though that was true, too, didn't deserve to be published.

I asked them to stop talking about it, but they wouldn't. I tried to change the subject, but they just ignored me.

I don't think I did the right thing...I think I should've tried harder.

What should I do next time?
I don't want to tell my friend because she would be heartbroken. I was just gonna tell her to be careful who she says stuff to.

SHOULD I tell my friend?
What should I do next time the team brings her up?

I feel awful.

Answer 1

To the confused friend whom don't know what to do!

you're on the right track as far as talking to your friend about "watching carefully about who she tells business to, cause everyone is clearly not a friend"...

The next time " I pray that when you speak on her behalf that you will speak with the AUTHORITY that God has placed in each of us, and put POWER in your voice so that you will be heard and your friend will know who her real friends are....Stand up for her but yet pray for her..as well as the ones that's doing the gossiping! They don't know any better there only acting out on what they've seen others do at some point or another....So pray that God delivers them from that gossiping spirit and place the love and kindness within their hearts. I pray that encouraging words will begin to be spoken from each one of the person that was gossiping....See and speak nothing but greatness in a person and watch for that change that God is going to do in their life........

Don't beat yourself up you did the right thing! I would love to have you as a friend.

Stay Encourage!

Answer 2

Honey, you can't stop that kind of gossip no matter what. I've found the best thing to do is look very closely at the others, you'll be able to tell which ones are as uncomfortable as you, single them out and suggest doing something fun, like going to the mall, or ANYTHING that is more fun than just sitting about gossiping. My daughter had a friend in HS that was not very popular, but a true friend, soon she dropped all of the others socially. At first she wondered if she did the right thing, because SHE became the victim of gossip. Soon she realized that she was behaving exactly that, a victim. She shook it off and moved on. Her best friend is still her best friend in college. And the others? Who knows what they' re doing, and I don't thing anybody really cares. Gossips are bullies. You'd do well to steer clear of that sort. You'll have a less stressful future without them.

Answer 3

Hey at least you made an effort. : ) When the team talks trash again about anyone say, "Hey that isn't nice to talk about someone behind their back. Makes me wonder what you say about me. We're supposed to be a team and that means encouraging one other instead."

They may not listen but at least you took a stand.

As for your friend I might tell her to be careful too.

When the team talks trash about her again say, "Is that all you have time for? Rooting around in other people's business? How would you feel if everyone knew all your secrets? I bet when each of you isn't here everyone else talks dirt about you too!"

I don't know if it will shut them up or not. The reality is people talk about each other. It's rude and immature but still happens. Just keep sticking up for your friend and anyone else. It's the right thing to do.

Answer 4

some psychologists have chanced on that folk usually do no longer believe people who don't have interaction in gossip. Letting others understand something undesirable approximately yet another could be an outstanding factor---say, in case you already know a guy or woman steals, lies, cheats, etc., this is usually sturdy to enable others understand. to work together in vicious, unfounded gossip is a sin.

Answer 5

You did what you could, the important thing is you dont let yourself get sucked in to the negativity. Gossip is like a bad cancer it keeps spreading and never goes away. Unfortunately there are people out there that feed off making other people look bad. Its your soccer team now it will be your co-workers later its always there. Be the better person and walk away from it. Dont tell your friend, she probably knows what they are like.

Answer 6

You did the right thing, and have nothing to feel bad about.

The same people who were talking about her, will talk about someone else who is not at practice next time.

There is nothing you can do about it, and no I would not say anything to your girlfriend, as it will only make her uncomfortable around her team mates.

Answer 7

If you tried and they ignored you, that's THEIR ignorance. It shows that they are not really a team, but a bunch of catty gossipy girls. I'm sure they'd do the same to you or any other girl that missed practice. Girls can be really immature and stupid. Don't let it get to you because what goes around comes around.

Answer 8

You can not controll what others say.
Live your life and encourage others to live there lives in such as way as the "gossip" is boring and not worth repeating.
And do not participate in the gossip youself

Answer 9

Just turn and walk away and note that it might be you that their talking about next. Its best to just keep your distance. I also would just suggest to your friend that they should not be considered friends.

Answer 10

Its not like they were spreading rumors. You said it was the truth. I guess I dont see the problem.