I've been with my girl for 4 months. She is a divorcee, reasono being she cheated on her EX husband. She dated the guy she cheated on her husband with for over a year, they broke up because she said he couldn't commit. that was 9 months ago. Now she kept his cell # in the phone and recieved text and calls from him, including times when we were in bed together sleeping, and she would answer them, but not tell me who they were from (i looked over her should one day because she was secretive about it and saw who it was). Asked her to remove the # because it made me feel uneasy. She said she was still friend but that he took advantage of her and ruined her life. After the 5th time of asked and her putting up a fight each time, she caved and did it. only to add it back the next day and call him with a lame excuse to get a personal homemade DVD back that had sentimental value. But i asked her is she called him and she said no, but admitted it only after a 4th time of asking.
2007-09-05 05:33:47 · 15 answers · asked by hero 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
she admitted she called him, but said it was an afterthought. I found out only because there was a call from him on the phone and went to pick it up but declined not to. She said i have nothing to worry about but she said she didnt remove the #'s on principle and that it felt like i was controling her but i asked her each time nicely to do it and she put up an arguement. Now she has no kids. and i later found a picture of her and a best guy friend at a party we were suppose to go to together but we had a fight and she went alone and the picture showed him with his arms wrapped around her bikine top and him bitting down and kissing her shoulder...is that weird?....any other signs a girl might cheat?...any help would be greatly appreciated....thank you!
PS...i see her every day...meaning i spend the night there 7 days a week...when is there time to cheat or could it just be emotional...
2007-09-05 05:34:04 · update #1
There are different ways to cheat on your spouse/mate besides in the sexual manner. She can cheat on your emotionally. She shares her emotional affections with another man besides you. I call that cheating. If she does not have you as her #1 man in her life, then that is a sign that your relationship is faltering. She seems like she does not want to let go of her past because she will use it as a safety net in case your relationship with her does not make it.
It's up to you to decide if you want to go thru this trouble to be with this woman or not. If you feel like you have to struggle with this relationship, maybe it is time to find a woman who will appreciate all of you.
2007-09-05 05:42:43 · answer #1 · answered by TheCoffeeDiva 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Signs of Deception:
Body Language of Lies:
• Physical expression will be limited and stiff, with few arm and hand movements. Hand, arm and leg movement are toward their own body the liar takes up less space.
• A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact.
• Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear. Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand.
Emotional Gestures & Contradiction
• Timing and duration of emotional gestures and emotions are off a normal pace. The display of emotion is delayed, stays longer it would naturally, then stops suddenly.
• Timing is off between emotions gestures/expressions and words. Example: Someone says "I love it!" when receiving a gift, and then smile after making that statement, rather then at the same time the statement is made.
• Gestures/expressions don’t match the verbal statement, such as frowning when saying “I love you.”
• Expressions are limited to mouth movements when someone is faking emotions (like happy, surprised, sad, awe, )instead of the whole face. For example; when someone smiles naturally their whole face is involved: jaw/cheek movement, eyes and forehead push down, etc.
Interactions and Reactions
• A guilty person gets defensive. An innocent person will often go on the offensive.
• A liar is uncomfortable facing his questioner/accuser and may turn his head or body away.
• A liar might unconsciously place objects (book, coffee cup, etc.) between themselves and you.
Verbal Context and Content
• A liar will use your words to make answer a question. When asked, “Did you eat the last cookie?” The liar answers, “No, I did not eat the last cookie.”
•A statement with a contraction is more likely to be truthful: “ I didn't do it” instead of “I did not do it”
• Liars sometimes avoid "lying" by not making direct statements. They imply answers instead of denying something directly.
• The guilty person may speak more than natural, adding unnecessary details to convince you... they are not comfortable with silence or pauses in the conversation.
• A liar may leave out pronouns and speak in a monotonous tone. When a truthful statement is made the pronoun is emphasized as much or more than the rest of the words in a statement.
• Words may be garbled and spoken softly, and syntax and grammar may be off. In other
words, his sentences will likely be muddled rather than emphasized.
Related Books:
Never be Lied to Again
Body Language
Other signs of a lie:
• If you believe someone is lying, then change subject of a conversation quickly, a liar follows along willingly and becomes more relaxed. The guilty wants the subject changed; an innocent person may be confused by the sudden change in topics and will want to back to the previous subject.
• Using humor or sarcasm to avoid a subject.
Final Notes:
Obviously, just because someone exhibits one or more of these signs does not make them a liar. The above behaviors should be compared to a persons base (normal) behavior whenever possible.
2007-09-05 05:41:01 · answer #2 · answered by Me 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
her past tells the whole story unfortunately. your in for some heartbreak here, a persons past is a good predictor of the future, this lady has a pattern of cheating on others, and not wanting to commit. save yourself some grief u are too good for this, she is showing dishonesty, she is disrespecting u, and relationships like this one are just not worth it. does she seem bored with u, less intimacy, won't communicate, gets defensive if u even mention cheating, secretive, avoids u, won't go any where with u, gets calls where caller hangs up, picks fights with u in order to find a reason to leave the house, abandons religion or god, dresses nicer, bathes alot more, low self worth, finds nothing but fault with u and every thing u do. u feel as if they are disconnecting from u. they also begin to tell u lies and there may be a complete change in their morals and belief system.
2016-04-03 04:51:32 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you already know the answer to this. I have an ex-boyfriend that I still talk to and we really are just friends. My boyfriend doesn't like him, so he doesn't know. I know that it's wrong, but he really is a dear friend to me now that we aren't dating. He lives in Floria and I live in N.Y. We don't see each other so there is no risk of cheating. But this girl has a way. If cheating ended her marriage why can't it end your relationship? I always say that if there is no trust, there is no relationship.She either needs to answer to your insecurities, or you need to walk away. It is very disrespectful for her to talk to him when the two of you are lying in bed together and then lie about it. She seems to have no respect for you. I hope you get the answers that you need, but above all, just follow what you know to be true. Good luck.
2007-09-05 05:45:30 · answer #4 · answered by momdidi 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Well, if you just want her for sex, then stop complaining and enjoy the "friends with benefits" package. Otherwise -- ahem, what did you expect? SHE'S the one with commitment issues, not her ex-boyfriend. She cheated on her husband -- why do you think you are so special that she won't cheat on you, too? Once a cheater, always a cheater.
Stop hounding her about her phone calls. You KNOW she's in contact with him, she's still going to parties with him. Get your head out of the sand, and look at the situation clearly and see her for what she is. If you're looking for fun sex, then keep hanging around, but stop asking questions that you already know the answers to. It's annoying :-). If you are looking for a committed relationship, though, then you aren't going to get it here. Your decision, dude. Stop make a melodrama out of it and deal with it.
2007-09-05 05:44:07 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like she's cheating. If she is so aggressive about keeping his number, answering his texts and calls in the middle of the night, and not telling you who she is talking to sounds like a cheater. You said that you spend every night together but what about during the day. A lot of people will meet up during the day as to not tip off their significant others if they are m.i.a. in the evening frequently.
2007-09-05 05:44:17 · answer #6 · answered by TenFour20 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Are you on some sort of medication? Why would involve yourself with a woman who cheated on her husband? Why wouldn't you understand that she will cheat on you as well? You've only been with the woman (she's not a girl) for 4 months and you're already on a high-speed roller coaster. Enjoy the ride, my friend.
2007-09-05 05:50:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
seriously. What more signs could you possibly need?! Shes a cheater. She cheated b4 and she's still involved with the guy she cheated with.........texting; pictures; kissing; biting; I have one more sign for you.
GET AWAY FROM HER FAST B4 THE NEXT SIGN IN AN STD
2007-09-05 05:58:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Sounds like you have no trust (with plenty of reason) & a relationship without trust won't work. Get out now before you get hurt.
2007-09-05 06:15:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Ouit it rite now, quit whinning,put your boots on and get out!! Too many ladies looking for good guys to put up with that @@#%
2007-09-05 05:41:24 · answer #10 · answered by happywjc 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋