I'm asking this, because I've often noticed that you can have a lot in common with a person and think that the person is physically good-looking, yet still not be attracted to him/her. On the other hand, you can also find yourself attracted to someone with whom you have little or nothing in common and whom you usually wouldn't consider physically appealing. What causes this?
2007-09-05 05:07:34 · 14 answers · asked by tangerine 7 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
This is something that humanity has been trying to figure out for centuries. Biochemically, the chemical released into your brain when you feel attraction to someone is called phenylethylamine, or PEA. But that doesn't explain why you can feel more with one person and not another.
The best speculation is there are other factors besides physical attractiveness that tell your brain "this person is a good mate for you." and that each gender is attracted to another that their body tells them would be most compatible raising the type of children with their particular gene pool. Certain elements are common to almost all of this, physical attractiveness being one of them. A young, firm, strong woman is a much better candidate for raising young than one who is older and weaker. But other female qualities also appeal to helping raise kids: faithfulness, gentleness, energetic, hospitality.
The qualities in men that women generally find attractive are also good when it comes to raising kids: money, strength, kindness, supportive.
2007-09-05 06:38:59 · answer #1 · answered by Vangorn2000 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't really know but let me say you have posted a fantastic question. It is one that is seldom asked and if asked is met with giggles and a little coy smile. I hope we get some good insights here from people who have made personal observations.
My own stab at this would be from a chemical messenger point of view. I have read that the body can create chemical
messengers for every emotion that the human can come up with. I think some of this can be "broadcast" to a person's immediate environment.
Please, a side note here: this is not confined to sexual chemistry but can be anything from anger to a feeling of relaxation.
So, that said I guess the person you find good looking may be into interests other than having sex all the time. So he/she is not broadcasting "my place or yours?" but maybe something more like "I really love music"
I think if you google pheromones you might get some info u r looking 4. But beware pheromones are often thought of in terms of sexual nature only.
My feeling is that every facet of human nature may be expressed by body chemistry, not just sexual stuff.
Yo, I just googled pheromones and it has plenty along the lines I said....very interesting stuff
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pheromone
Thanks for a great question and HAGD (have a great day)
2007-09-05 05:32:52 · answer #2 · answered by andyg77 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't have a definitive answer, but maybe a piece of the puzzle.
Although compared to most animals, humans have virtually no sense of smell, there are some theories that suggest that we unconsciously detect and respond to certain scent signals that indicate health, genetic compatibility, etc.
If this is true, then indeed "chemistry" is the right term!
I think the right, and safe, answer is that no one knows for sure. I find myself repeating patterns that I am familiar with, even if they are not good for me - psychological templates or whatever for interactions. I'm trying to approach things a little differently these days.
2007-09-05 06:42:22 · answer #3 · answered by American citizen and taxpayer 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I am off again...sorry..pheromones...the unwashed carry lots of pheromones...in a study, it was concluded that the human perspiration supposedly carries pheromones or something that is appealing to the opposite sex...so maybe, just maybe, there is no difference between someone having something in common but more to do with when they bathed last and how much cologne or perfume they are wearing...I AM getting more absurd with every question, eh.
2007-09-06 00:51:44 · answer #4 · answered by bruce b 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am sorry I have never been attracted to someone who i have considered physically un appealing or have nothing in common with!!!! It would happen very,very rarely!!! Their has to be chemistry at some level!!
2007-09-05 05:53:47 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you are mistaken simple curiosity or infatuation for sexual chemistry. We all eventually have an idea of what we want and what we can have. once in a while though we come across something interesting that piques our curiosity and we decide we want to try it because it is different enough to be interesting. Try it, you may like it. It may be just what you crave or need but you never thought about it before. There are things out there close by to us that we know nothing about and they have not been part of our daily routine so we do not know what it is all about. Be adventurous and see if it is or is not what you have been looking for in life but have never heard of or seen before.
2007-09-05 05:21:33 · answer #6 · answered by ejohnjr34 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when i was single & met my husband i knew right away that he was the man in my life! we became best friends first, then went out dancing alot & dated for about 6 months before we got intimate so my answer to u is this, i was attracted to my husband's looks first then his friendship then i knew that we had the chemistry because it was very obvious but the most important of all was the mutual respect for each other that did it for me. no pressure at all & then our friendship became very, very close to the point where we would be with each other day & night & then came our relationship to the next step for us both & it was & still is so wonderful. love is such a beautiful thing & it grows as time goes by & we do too. i'm not sure that this is what happens to everybody but to me it's the best life i've ever had & have & i'm just a very lucky lady! so that's my answer to your question. bb
2016-05-17 09:06:53 · answer #7 · answered by ciara 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is deep seeded primal instinct, it actually just happened to me not but a week ago. The very first time we met I knew that it was something special...it is hard to explain but it is natural.
2007-09-05 05:16:15 · answer #8 · answered by railer01 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
One reason is scent.Everybody has there own smell and if your mind likes the thormones [i think] given off,then that is a possible mate.A basic instinct of humans is to reproduce. So if they smell right,they may be the mate
2007-09-05 05:19:16 · answer #9 · answered by yp_tim_gillett 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋
the mistery is a good part, maybe you want to find out whats its like with that person
2007-09-05 05:15:31 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋