How important is your partner's education level to you?

Question

My best friend is in this relationship (has been in it for almost 5 years now) and is living with the guy, and is planning on getting married someday and stuff. I like him for her too, he seems really nice and sincere and I know he adores her, which is cute, ya know? It seems like they get along and stuff, and before she met this guy she was the type that never had a serious relationship so I know that means love for her. Anyway, my friend just got her Master's degree and that has me wondering how important a partner's level of education is because her man is a high school graduate only. I think this used to bother her but then in the begining, but i guess as she got to know him she decided what was important was who he is not his education level, but i do think now it is begining to bother her again...she says that she would ideally want him to get his BA but he doesnt seem that interested in going to school. i do hope they can make it work, but what do you think are their chances?

Also, ladies would you date someone that has a lower education level than you (let's say you have a degre/MA and he only has HS), do you think that the education level of a couple determines and put a limit to their relationship, if so in what ways? Guys, how would you feel dating someone that has a more education level that you ( a woman with master's or doctoral degree and you only have say a HS or BA), would you be Ok with it or would you feel submissive or anything like that. Basically, I want to know what people's thoughts and ideas are on this matter because everyone of my friends people say that now that she has a Master's degree their relationship is going to take a toll for the worse and I think her man is starting to believe these people (she says he seems more insecure now and stuff, which is understandable because he doesnt want to lose her and stuff, ya know?)

anyways folks, please respond with mature answer only..if you want to act like a kid, do it else where. Thanks

Answer 1

To be honest, I have met some of the dumbest smart people. I have a friend who graduated from law school and works for the DA, but doesnt know where to get his oil changed. He misses his exit off the freeway and put a $20 bill into a quarter machine and thought he would get dollar bills back.

Some people are better at school than others, but that doesnt mean they are more intelligent.

My wife and I both have our degrees but it doesnt matter to me. I would be disappointed if my wife was being held back because of a degree and she didnt persue it.

Answer 2

Hi...

It's important to me that my partner issues common sense, is honest and compassionate, as well... it's also very important they take their responsibilities seriously, pay their bills. I also have to have someone who will let me know how they feel about situations, has ambitions and goals for themselves.

Level of education isn't that important, but i don't want someone who acts like a moron. I appreciate proper English and it hurts my ears when people say things like "i don't got no" or "them are nice" or "it blowed up".. arghhhhhhhh!

Please! Sometimes i wonder what goes on in English classes these days?

I don't like continual cussing either... i suppose some people think it's "cool" to say f**k all of the time... all it does cause me to cringe.

I'm not a prude and am open to most anything... i just want someone who acts their age, and can speak the language, is considerate, HONEST, and responsible. I knew someone who said they "didn't care" how they spoke, and well, "i don't care" is indicative of low self-esteem.

I've come across too many who feel someone owes them the world, have no ambition, and i think they took a language class at the Truckers School of Finer Language Arts!

I've also been told I am too particular... ok whatever

Yes, i know... i'm a lazy typist....

Answer 3

I think it's not so much a degree that matters; however, a general intellectual compatibility is very important in a relationship. Intellectual capabilities don't always correspond to official degrees; my husband doesn't have a formal degree - he left college to start his own company - but he is very successful in what he does, and is intellectually brilliant, which is something I absolutely adore in him. Everything he knows he taught himself, and he's still a tireless learner. However, I've known people with M.D.s and Ph.D.s who in their personal life seemed very ignorant. I wouldn't look at a "degree" per se, but instead at a general level of intellectual prowess and curiosity. I am not crazy about people who are intellectually lazy or complacent, no matter what formal education they possess. I think your friend has to figure out for herself if she's ok with the way her partner is; perhaps it is not the lack of formal education that is bugging her, but his stagnation and his lack of desire to better himself - which, if she's the opposite, can become a problem in a relationship.

Answer 4

I asked/ask myself this question in regards to my relationship many times. I am a 4 year college graduate and my boyfriend didn't even graduate h.s. He did go to a technical school for his electrician/hvac/plumbers certificate, and also went to school for his Commercial Driver's License. He doesn't really speak well (I was and English major so I'm extra picky) and his writing skills are poor, but his heart is made of gold and we get along so well. Our relationship has been going strong for nearly 2 years and we respect each other, understand each other, support each other, and love each other very much. I realize there's a big imbalance educationwise, but sometimes I think about a cousin of mine whose husband has all the education in the world and behaves like an animal and treats her like dirt and it doesn't matter so much.I'm happy with him and he jokingly but seriously says that when we have kids I'm the smart one so I'll teach them the school stuff and help with their homework and he'll teach them the handy stuff and games and sports.

Answer 5

I can't say it matters that much, since I know MANY people who never went to college that own their own successful businesses. In fact, some of them even got a GED instead of a diploma. Lack of college does not always equal lack of ambition. Beyond that though, I think when too much emphasis is placed on money and certain achievements, rather than on the relationship between the two, that is when trouble begins.

Answer 6

if his educational attainment does not bother with the way they cope with living and with their relationship, then, let go of it. what is important is harmony out of their differences.

there are many educated couples who ended up their relationship in a disaster, in the same manner that there are many couples who hardly had any schooling who got success stories to tell. so, educational level is not an issue. coping with differences does make an issue. things depend on the persons in the relationship.

anyway, when they deal with life, they won't be asking each other how many diplomas does one have or how much he knows about a certain topic. what they will be discussing more is what they have in their kitchen to make them survive.

Answer 7

i was married first time to someone with a stupid liberl arts degree - basically money wasted. ended up not being motivated, wanted to stay home when we had kids, etc. i am now remarried to a successful bus-man with an MBA and am much happier. that's just what makes ME happy. i needed/wanted someone "stronger' than me. i have a friend who is a very successful bus-woman, makes LOTS of money, and her hubby of no college can't even take care of the kids (he's not a stay home dad). she gets him a nanny, house cleaner, she gets home from work and cooks, to me he's pretty worthless. is it a common denominator that they had either no or crappy college degrees? don't know. but we all look upon her marriage as "why is she with him?' he brings NO value to thier marriage other than she doesn't want to bust up the marriage due to their kids. plus personally i think she married him b/c she was getting older and wanted kids - so she settled. in my opinion, different levels of education make a marriage challenging. it can still work, but the more educated woman has to have a broad outlook on her life, i think anyway. personally, i could not handle it and am glad of my life change to my new husband. it's all in how your friend views this difference. if she;s already having issues with it and wants him to go to school, then i think you need to tell her to REALLY THINK this thru. tell her to think about it when she's the breadwinner and wants to have kids. she can't stay home (maybe won't even want to, but) and he can't support the family on a HS degree only. yeah he's nice and they're "cute", but will he cook? bie a good role model? encourage his kids to go to college themselves? these are things she needs to think about. good luck!

Answer 8

My husband graduated from a technical school, so it wasn't a full four year college, while I graduated with a four year liberal arts college degree. It bothers him way more than it bothers me, in fact, it has never bothered me because the true measure of my man is the fact that he can support our family with the skills he learned far better than I can with my "fancy" four year degree. Nowadays an education is ONLY what you make of it.

Answer 9

I know a chic that is along the same lines as your girl, she is my brother in laws girlfriend, and she has a degree and he does not.

I have been to school, and my boyfriend has a high scholl education, and I love him more than anything, we have a child together, and we are greeeaaaatttt!!!

If your man has a high school diploma, and he works, and he takes care of bills, and he is able to provide for his family, who gives a **** if he chose not to further his education.

There are people working in McDonald's in debt with a degree, so what's the difference?????????DAMN!!!!!!

Answer 10

If he has plenty of common sense and reasoning with an attidtude to go work and advance it does not matter his education level. If he does not then there would be a problem no matter the level.