Ladies, if you've asked your husband to be the sole provider, do you complain about what it takes?

Question

If you've told your husband that you dreamed of being an at home mom, raising your kids, with a nice house...do you then complain and give your husband a hard time about what it takes to provide for that dream? When he says I have to work, do you complain about the extra hours and missed events at school or are these losses balanced by the fulfillment of living life as you wished?

Tenessee....
I get that women complain. I've been getting that for 12 years. It's just starting to wear a bit thin.

Valerie X...you both work full time. good for you. Not what I was asking.

I'm asking other stay at home wives if they complain about 70 and 80 hour weeks and all that goes with it. Like working most sat. mornings. and going back to work after the kids go to bed. And having to miss the beginning if not all of some ball games, performances, etc. Because that is what the husband knows is necessary to maintain the job which maintains the lifestyle.

Am I expecting to much for less complaining and arguing. Or is this normal for women in this position.

By the way...I do take care of all the man chores at home, plus pitch in with folding wash, cooking on weekends, etc. And in 12 years I've become one hell of a plumber, electrician, and carpenter on the weekends. In case I get bored, there is always something to be fixed, built or changed.

Answer 1

They sure do complain! They (wives) want to go on vacation but then don't have any money to help pay for. They expect you to pay the household bills THEN buy them stuff or get their car repaired.

And the real selfish one. They expect you to do all these things, work to save money for the children's college education THEN cannot understand why you won't just spend, spend, spend like they want you to. That type of wife is a mindless robot being lead by TV advertising and the "PROMISED" hype life style.

Tell them all to GET BACK TO WORK AND HELP ATTAIN THE FAMILY GOALS!

Answer 2

I have the same desire. I would try not to complain though. It is also a full time job to be a homemaker doing full time child care, so I would discuss how to balance our time as a couple and take turns attending certain events. I think that no matter what the spouses are doing, children need both of their parents support. Maybe you can work a deal where you help with the homework and attend the parent-teacher conferences, while your wife attends all the games and takes them shopping.

Answer 3

We both work full time, and I bring home just as much bacon as he does. :-) We enjoy some nice things, some nice trips to visit home (we're military) and the kids get a bit better life then we got growing up. That is our family goal. We're working on other financial goals, such as buying a house and having quite a bit of savings for that rainy day, should there ever be one. As for me, I would like to be a SAHM, but I enjoy my job. Plus my kids get to go and play with their friends all day long too! They miss going to see them when I take off. So in my book everyone wins. We didn't miss the first steps or words and my kids share a lot in my opinion.

Answer 4

I would never ask my husband to that -- his time with our children is as valuable to them as my time.

I am lucky to be at a place in my career where I can work from home, but I have always worked. We've always just adjusted our schedules and split household tasks so that the kids will have the best of both parents.

Answer 5

I don't have to work long hours and she still will complain! And I don't miss events because I can leave work anytime and she still will complain. She even brings the kids to my office when she goes to the Dr. or gets a massage or visits the chiropractor and she still complains!

WOMEN COMPLAIN get used to it!

Answer 6

I'd want it all...but, if me staying at home was keeping him from his family then I'd go back to work. Atleast PT to offset the extra time he's away from us...if that wasn't enough then I'd work FT.

Answer 7

NO! I never complain. I always leave love notes and tell him I appreciate him for working so hard.

Answer 8

if i was a lady making such request, i would not complain provided the money comes.

Answer 9

must be nice to have your man take care of you; I do EVERYTHING! I hate it, I hate him. She should be fuc*ing greatful that she has someone she can depend on like that. People suck

Answer 10

we both work full time, and we both shuttle our boys to their extracurricular activites...........I do all the housework, he takes care of the lawn, garage and cars..........