it has been almost a year since my wife left me. she rejected me 'n' number of times and are soon going to be divorced (after 18 mths of marriage). whenever we have a talk she talks about herself and asks me what i am doing these days. since i feel rejected i don't talk much except ask for her wellbeing.
Whenever we talk she says she came to know what i am upto from other friends and hammers me by telling i am not sharing anything with her. If she is so much concerned she can come back to me but that she doesn't want to.
Please help me know what does she want from me? how can she expect this from me?
2007-09-05 02:20:20 · 25 answers · asked by bebe 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
This is the type of a woman that can hand out the rejection but can't take it. She wants to know all about what you have been up to so that she can still feel like she has you. Simply tell her that she is the one that has initiated it all and that you wish not to concern her with your life now. That should get the point across clearly. You may also tell her that the only things that she will learn from the friends are the things that you want them to know and that by all means not everything is told to them.
2007-09-05 02:32:03 · answer #1 · answered by pappysgotitgoinon 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is possible to love someone and not be able to be married to them or live with them. She obviously married you for a reason. The short marraige shows to me that you guys loved (or love) each other but that once together, she realized that the situation was not what she expected. Just because she wants a divorce does not mean she doens't love you deep down inside somewhere. After being with someone, it is very hard to just completely sever ties with that person. Use your best judgement for the situation and if you have to, tell her she has to either be in your life 100% or completely out of it.
2007-09-05 09:35:56 · answer #2 · answered by Amanda F 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She probably wants to be friends, but she gave up the right to know every detail of your life when she left you. Just tell her that you don't want to talk to her anymore. That's kind of the point of a divorce. Sometimes divorced couples can be friends but in most cases it takes a lot of time to get to that point.
Your friends should not be telling her everything about you. If they are then they're her friends, not yours. Move on.
2007-09-05 09:28:47 · answer #3 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to start cutting your ties with her.... She's the one who left you and the marriage...There's no reason why she should concern herself of your well being through other people....She doesn't have that right anymore...You need to let her know how you feel and how you need her to move on with her decision...If she's feeling guilty or is having second thoughts then thats something she must deal with...She shouldn't try to make you feel like you were the one who left her.....Trust me as hard as it was for her to walk out of your life, you will feel better off eventally when you take the first steps to moving forward yourself....I wish you all the best***
2007-09-05 09:52:30 · answer #4 · answered by Yvette D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry but i think that all that she wants to hear is that you are miserable without her and that you still need her even if thats not the case she wants to think that she is the only person in your life and that she is the only person that would have ever wanted you so i think that you should go out enjoy yourself have the time of your life and then tell her averything that she wantes to know maybe she will see what's going on and leave you alone or she might even want you back
2007-09-05 09:45:15 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, what business is it of hers what you're doing? NONE! Sounds to me like she doesn't want you... but doesn't want anyone to have you either. I know... crazy... She wants to know that you're miserable without her, that your life is over, all because you don't have her. Best way to shut her up?... Go out with friends, have fun and by all means, date. I'm not saying go out and have sex, as you are still married until your divorce is final. But... go have some fun. I can tell you that there are a lot of single gals out there that would kill for the knight. Don't give her the satisfaction of being home when she calls and what not. Good luck to you.
2007-09-05 09:38:34 · answer #6 · answered by Beatngu 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think what u want is more important. if u feel u have moved on and u want the divorce then set the boundaries for how u want to relate to her and let her know. if u are confused about ur feelings for her u cd ask her to back off a while as u sort them out. then when u get over the anger of the rejection u will want to reevaluate ur choices
2007-09-05 09:35:13 · answer #7 · answered by kiki68 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is really sad, but listen up.
Some women just want to know that they are desired. She is getting satisfaction from holding on to the thought that you still care about her and possible still want her.
Personally, I wouldn't give her the satisfaction of receiving any attention from you at all.
I bet the more you ignore her, the more she will chase after you. Not that you should play that game, or even think of taking such a fickle person back into your life.
2007-09-05 09:30:25 · answer #8 · answered by conim2002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi bebe.... Don't get me wrong because I'm not trying to be rude but your ex needs to keep out of your business and personal life if she intends to proceed with this divorce. She might be trying to gather information to give to her attorney what I don't know but she's being to nosy in your personal life. I would suggest this to her. Tell her in a nice but be suttle manner that if she doesn't want to be in your life any longer then leave you and your personal life alone. That she has no business in what you say or what you do and to also leave your friends alone also. To keep your name out of her mouth. Now, I know she is still your wife but why would she inquire about personal business in your life if she wasn't up to something or had no intentions in getting back together with you. You could also tell her that she either comes back to you and stop worrying what you do in your personal life or leave you alone. Pure and simple. Good luck in your situation. Take care and have a great day!
2007-09-05 13:21:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
She has not completely let you out of her system and not she is not over you - that is why she is concerned about you and your well being. She is seeking others out to tell her what she needs to know and mostly she is probably consumed with if you're involved with someone else or not. She is like this because one she cares and two she is soul tied to you and she probably wanted out of the marriage over something trivial that you two probably could fix through counseling.
If you want your wife back fight for her and let her know that you want her back, if you want to move on and have let her go out of your system and have not allowed pride to shut you down and resist talking to her or letting her inside, then talk to her and express your feelings she is not a mind reader and if you want to go forward without her then let her know there is nothing further for you two to discuss unless it is the separation of the marital assets and if you have children their well being.
Move out of pride and you don't have to be right in order to reconcile.
2007-09-05 09:27:53 · answer #10 · answered by justaboutpeace 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋