I am the first to admit that I am the kind of person who takes everything to heart, and divides life into experiences of rejection and acceptance of myself.
How could it be any different?
And recently, I read that very description in a context which leads me to assume this to be a sign of bad character.
Why would this be bad?
I don't get it. Wouldn't the world be a great place if everyone was like that?
2007-09-04 17:13:14 · 13 answers · asked by Tahini Classic 7 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
well i think it is not good for the simple fact that it is impossible to please everyone and not everybody likes you. i learned this and accepted it and am much happier. usually the ppl who dont like me are the types i dont really like ether. so there u go
i heard a theory that
1/3 all ppl will like u no matter what
1/3 will be indfferent or undecided
1/3 just dont like u , so deal with it
2007-09-04 17:27:03 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly how you feel for I am the very same way . It is not an act or a way to get people to like me ,but rather me being myself .The person that God created me to be.
I refuse to change ,pretend to be someone I'm not merely to get people to like me . I refuse to do drug's,drink or go against the grain that is the very foundation of who I am . To do thing's that I don't believe in.
I do not feel that I am better than others.I'm not a goody goody . I am ME!!!
It hurts when people don't accept you for who you are ,but what can you do ? You can't force people to like you .
This world has grown to be very judgmental .People not accepting you if you don't meet their criteria .
If you truly are a good person ,people are afraid to trust you and/ or they call you fake.They think good people don't exist. People that are truly honest and sincere.
No! Its not bad character to be good . It''s just that the human race has twisted everything and made it so that it is bad to be good ,but good to be bad .
A lot of people have forgotten their true self. They've locked them away ,swept them under a rug due to the fact that they have changed to please other people .
Wouldn't the world be a beautiful place if people were truly who they were meant to be ?
2007-09-05 20:35:44 · answer #2 · answered by NasCarl #99 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Most people want to be liked. The problem though is that we can end up acting as someone else entirely just to make sure everyone likes us. You lose your sence of identity. Also, if you are always worried about whether people like you or not it can end up being a anxiety ridden life
I have always firmly believed that the first person to like you should be yourself. If you do that then it shouldn't bother you too much if the odd person dislikes you. Lets face it no one is liked by every single person. If I were you I would just be myself and not try to always live up to everyone else's expectations for the sake of just being liked. That doesn't mean you have to be so straight with people that you insult them but a good medium line isn't a bad idea.
2007-09-05 00:32:40 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I think it is perfectly normal....nothing wrong at all. As long as it does not become an obsession for you, your only goal in life, or you do things with this only purpose. If you spend a couple of nights sleepless because somebody does not like you, there could be something wrong, and you have to look for the reason deep inside you... (for the reason it worries you so much, not the reason that someone does not like you)
Being liked pleases everyone, and if somebody denies it is lying. It is just or nature. But it is also very important to accept rejection (i know, it sound funny...).... to cope with the fact that somebody does not like you (and that he/she also has the right not to like you... ) and don't break your head trying to figure out why... we are just all different, thank god...
I personally just feel disappointed when somebody I LIKE does not like me. But i don't try to persuade them... after a little while, it just slides.... The people i love like me, and that's enough for me :-)
saludos desde tu patria, Weirdo!
ach, und ich mag Dich schon... wenns Dich glücklich macht... ;-)
2007-09-05 16:33:33 · answer #4 · answered by brezel-monster 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That's a bold and interesting statement.
It's normal to want people to like you but does it matter what you'll do to achieve this goal? Does it matter to you WHY people like you? If wanting people to like you becomes more important than considering the thoughts, feelings and well being of others then it can be a problem. This could be a sign of a lack of empathy. Not good when you're a social animal (as human beings are). Good for you for being so self-aware!
2007-09-05 02:03:48 · answer #5 · answered by reclusive extrovert 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Everyone wants to be liked!! Therefore there is nothing wrong with a person who wants to be liked. You need to lighten up a little and don't take things to heart each and every time. There will be always be someone who won't like you and there will always be someone who you don't like!! Life is too short to worry about this, so just be yourself and stop dissecting acceptance and rejection!!
2007-09-05 00:26:50 · answer #6 · answered by sun_beam61 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Frankly, I can't imagine a world where everything is either 'advancement' or some sort of 'black eye' -Were you in the military, maybe some kiss-up always conniving to get attention and promotions?
I don't believe the world would be better if everyone did that, no. Its got enough ego w hor es already.
2007-09-05 00:33:10 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
From what I got from an answer to one of your other questions, I've deduced you are in academics. A field that requires one to be liked in order to get tenure.
As a former aspiring academic myself I can say personal differences and all-things non-academic are the reason I got out of that line of work. As one of the few conservatives in a highly liberal political science department I was ALWAYS at odds with both my professors and other students. In order for them to like me I had to agree with them and feed their egos. Since I constantly debated them (and usually proved my point better than even some of the PhDs) I was generally not well liked. When I saw other professors I knew get the axe from thier departments (usually for doing the right thing or doing their job) I felt it was my time to split. Three professors I was well aquainted with (at two universities) were all canned in a two year span due to simple personality disagreements. I had had enough and realized I didn't want this sh!t.
Now, on a personal level...it's nice to be liked. No one likes rejection...unless you are some wierd emo kid trying to compose the next Morrisey-esque album. I used to always wonder if someone was going to like me or not. Then one day I said "Screw this, what do I care?" It came full-tilt when I hit my sophomore year in college. I went out of my way to be a bit stand-offish to my classmates Freshman year. My my second year I really didn't give a flip. That's when I started attracting people to me. I'm sure there are a bunch of Mother F-ers who still want me dead because I pissed them off writing in the newspaper or literary magazine or at student government or in class...but screw those guys. My people found ME...I didn't have to go looking for friends once I decided where I was going to hang my hat.
My wise-ass remarks, off-color humor, politically incorrect statements and my rather cavalier attitude usually garnish me with enough friends that i don't have to worry about who DOESN'T like me.
Then there are the true friends...here's your exercise for today:
List the people who you want to carry your coffin to your grave. Then list the people who will insist that they carry your coffin, and then list the people who's coffin you would carry. THOSE are the people you have to worry about. They are the ones who really matter.
2007-09-06 23:43:31 · answer #8 · answered by Willie D 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't consider it to be a sign of bad character but i would consider it to be a bit of a character flaw because it would appear that you are using others opinion of you as a measuring stick to dictate your opinion of yourself. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be liked but it more important that you like yourself because if you don't what reason are you giving anyone else to like you.
2007-09-05 00:24:16 · answer #9 · answered by AH SHIIII... 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't be overly worried about what others think. It is more important what you think of yourself-- as in are you living your life doing the right thing and doing the best you can. It may matter what those close to you think. The others don't matter.
2007-09-05 00:21:07 · answer #10 · answered by knowyourself 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋