I've been feeling lonely lately because my husband has been working a lot, my mom and sister live about 2 hrs away so i dont get to spend much time with them. I usually go to my sis in law's house so i dont stay home alone but it's not the same, they're just there, we dont really talk much so i just watch tv. It makes me feel lonely and i get depressed a lot, i get frustratred and it's obviously hurting my husband because i kind of take my anger out on him. Any advice?? please?? He's looking for a better job so he doesn't have to work as much.
2007-09-04 14:33:17 · 12 answers · asked by Pat's Angel 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I can't get a job yet because i'm trying to get my work permit straighten out :(
2007-09-04 14:44:12 · update #1
I don't think your husband needs that kind of treatment from you right now. He is doing the best that he can even when he is trying to get a better job. You need to support each other and be grateful that he is out there working to support you. You need to find other ways to keep you busy while he is working. Find a ladies group to join, craft group if you like doing crafts, sewing class, volunteer work at the ER, etc.....find a hobby that you would enjoy doing, or even re-arrange the furniture in the house. If you like gardening, do some garden work like planting flowers or herbs. I think it's a little late for that though, maybe next spring. Or you can write letters to loved ones that you haven't seen in a long time. If you like listening to music, put on some classical or what ever type of music you like, or go out and get some books at your local library. If you like taking pictures like outdoors, take some pictures when going out for a walk. I find myself doing that when I take my walks during the week. Lots of things you can do!!
All I am saying is that you shouldn't take your frustrations out on your husband because he is frustrated himself because of the way you are behaving. He doesn't need that right now. What he does need is a wife who is waiting for him after work with some hugs and kisses! He doesn't need to be yelled at with negativity, he probably listens to that all day at work! You are not helping him with your attitude. So you need to help him. When he comes home, he should come home to a "loving wife", offering him a glass of ice-tea. He should come home to a wife who appreciates all that he does. He should come home to a wife who respects him for who he is. That's what he is looking for. No more anger, he needs love and support from you! Be sensitive to his needs and he should be sensitive to yours too.
I would consider you reading "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" and "The Proper Care and Feeding of Marriage." I challenge you both to do some reading. That way you can read while he is at work.
What I am saying here, I am serious, but are you willing to work on yourself and are you serious enough to be the wife your husband deserves? The ball is in your court and you both are in this marriage together as a team!
2007-09-04 14:55:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, realize that life will change and things will get better. Men want to "fix" our problems, and when they cannot fix them, they feel frustrated. So your husband is probably feeling really bad right now.
You are going to have to take some responsibility for your own happiness and time. Just because you cannot work doesn't mean you can't get out and get involved. Can you join a gym and take classes? What about joining a church and a woman's group or study group? Can you volunteer? www.volunteermatch.org
Are you good with kids? What about becoming a nanny or babysitting while you wait for a regular job? Check our craigslist.org for you area. Or go to the library and get some great books. Do you like to read? There are book clubs at the library as well as Barnes and Noble.
Now, get out there and start living....
2007-09-04 14:54:33 · answer #2 · answered by lefttheroom222 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I totally understand how you feel hun, being in the same lonely situation. My hubby is in the army and works 24/7 it feels like. I am living in a state where I dont know anybody....seriously no one LOL. My 4 year old just started pre-k, so it's just me and my 3 year old all day long! I started getting really moody as well, sad, depressed, lonely.....then I decided to take matters into my own hands seeing as how it was my responsibility because no one was going to do it for me, so........
First, I joined my kids PTA, starting to make some good friends.
Second, I told my hubby that when he hung out with his friends to tell them to invite their wives as well, now I am meeting some really great ladies who can relate with me.
And last but not least, why dont you try getting involved in some activities like volunteer work....or if ya could use the extra cash a part time job would help out a lot, and then maybe hubby wouldnt have to put so many hours in.
Whatever you decide, remember, life is short, so cherish the time you do have with family and friends. I hope this helped! Good luck to ya!
2007-09-04 14:52:55 · answer #3 · answered by Jenn 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Seems you are feeling a little sorry for yourself. The poor man works a lot of hours then has your anger directed at him. You should consider getting a job of your own, maybe work the same hours as your husband, then you would not be home alone and he would not have to work so much. It would be a win - win situation.
2007-09-04 14:40:21 · answer #4 · answered by NAN G 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You need to find a hobby or get involved with a support group. You need to make yourself happy by doing what you enjoy not just sit around and think about how lonely you are. I do this, my husband is at work and my kids are in bed and I answer question....YEAH ME!!!
2007-09-04 14:39:20 · answer #5 · answered by belly42 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You know, I don't believe I've ever seen my avatar cry. She's pretty thick-skinned. Not much gets to her.
2016-04-03 04:01:26 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to see your Doctor.......Tell him about your symptoms..he may prescribe anti depressants and counseling. Why don't you try getting a job to keep your mind occupied? Or join a gym.....exercise helps alot with depression...........you get Too tired working out to make your hubby miserable. Seriously. sitting around watching the tube would make anyone cranky.
2007-09-04 14:42:53 · answer #7 · answered by Lisa W 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
neither your mom or sister could drive to your place? 2 hours isn't that far away... i really can't see how this is a problem. Maybe take your husband to work and drop him off and drive to see your mom and sister.
2007-09-04 14:53:05 · answer #8 · answered by mims03 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
maybe you should see a Dr.
Is it possible for you to get a part time job
you have to do something or you"ll go mad,I've been there and it's not a nice place.
the only difference in our stories is I had 3 children and I was a thousand miles from friends and family
2007-09-04 14:46:56 · answer #9 · answered by luvspace 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you need to find a job or volunteer at your church or a school or library. Sitting around and feeling sorry for yourself while you watch T.V. is a waste of time.
2007-09-04 14:40:57 · answer #10 · answered by Mama Mia 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋