I was married for almost 10 years and, every guy I date is a waste of time. We married early so I think of this as a selection process. But the more I date the less progress I think I'm really making. We've been seperated for almost two years now, and I haven't had a relationship since. The crazy part is, I never look to date men, I get asked out all the time and alot of times I do say no. But I feel lonely, so I will go out with someone. Every now and then. Has anyone ever felt they will stay unattached? I'm not looking to remarry, simply companionship.
2007-09-04 08:52:17 · 26 answers · asked by RDark 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
u need some1 who can take care of u..look out fr a guy whome u like ...spend time with him...dnt marry but live in together...try n knw each other..if things go perfect....doors r open!!
al the best!!
2007-09-04 08:59:26 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I married fairly late (at 29). I divorced very early! After less than a year---needless to say, it never should have happened. I have been in several serious relationships, but I just can't seem to make that final committment. I've called off an engagement, and behaved in a manner to make the other relationships fail.
At 45, I am comfortable knowing that I may never have a companion I'd want to marry. I also know I don't want to be alone the rest of my life. So this is a constant battle--and you need to find your own balance. Something you can live with. Your own expectations will make or break you, so be realistic and hopeful. Define what you are willing to live with and what others would have to be willing to live with if they would like you as a partner.
Don't be discouraged. There are tons of jerks out there, and tons of great guys.
2007-09-04 16:01:25 · answer #2 · answered by Jenyfer C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know exactly how you feel! I was married twice. After my second marriage I dated quite a lot but never felt any real connection. I even got sick of dating. I honestly came to the conclusion that I'd forever be single and I was okay with that! But...when I wasn't looking, when I wasn't even thinking about being with anyone, a guy who was an online friend asked me out. I figured what the heck, why not? After a few dates I still wasn't into it. Still planning to be single. Then one day it just hit me like a ton of bricks and I was in love! Oh! I hated the fact too! lol But now nearly three years later I'm glad I gave him a chance.
So...I guess what I'm saying here is it's okay to stay single, but keep a part of your heart open just in case Mr. Right shows up. He may just take you buy surprise! ;-)
2007-09-04 16:01:14 · answer #3 · answered by KellyWallace 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes - I have felt the same way. Stayed single for about three years without dating, just going out with friends as a group. It was the best thing to do after a long 10 year relationship. Don't worry about dating, just have some good friends around!!
2007-09-04 15:59:32 · answer #4 · answered by L W 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Single is the only way to be. But that does NOT mean being lonely. Go out on all the dates you want. Get laid once in a while (but be safe). Have friends. Have hobbies. Have fun. No reason in the world why you have to be in a serious committed relationship or get married in order to have companionship.
2007-09-04 16:12:24 · answer #5 · answered by meagain 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I choose to be single because I cant handle the drama. I havent had a relationship in a long time, and I havent had a date in almost a year. I am not unattractive, I am just choosy. I dont waste my time on anyone. I am okay with being alone because in the long run, I am the only person who will care about me. Sometimes I get sad, but I would rather wait for perfection than just to settle for anyone off the street!
2007-09-04 16:00:41 · answer #6 · answered by Kimberly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, after my 2nd divorce (a decade ago) I didn't care if I got involved in relationships anymore...but naturally after the anger/hurt of that situation wore off, I felt differently.
I go out from time to time, but I'm not on a boyfriend hunt and know that I can have a fantastic life as a single so I don't "need" a man in my life...the guy I'm seeing now may turn out to be someone I'm with long term, or not. Either way, I'm okay with that...I enjoy companionship and intimacy, but only when it's working well for both of us. I'm not going to put up with a lot of bs just to have a guy in my life.
2007-09-04 15:58:46 · answer #7 · answered by . 7 · 6⤊ 0⤋
if your happy being "unattached" then you have no problems but if you are not ..... and it obviously seem like that because your complianing about being loney.... then you should do something about it. You need to pick up yourself and get over your ex, see the the problem your having has nothing to do with your not being to motivated to go on dates instead its your being so profoundly hurt about he latter relationship { your ten yrs of being married} that you have dug yourself in an depressing quagmire thats preventing you from moving-on emotional. you owe it to your self to be happy, you need to start loving yourself again because that the first step to being loved...... I hope I was of some help you have a wonderful day now, I am wishing you all the best
2007-09-04 16:11:35 · answer #8 · answered by tripod 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lonely is not like keeping bad company..
Are we so co-dependent were we need to be with a person to be happy?
That's like saying only money makes happiness a reality..
Geez, I really thought I was crazy for a long time but lately I've noticed its not all me....
I don't want to get married with anyone just because that's Americas dream or simply because I don't want to be alone..
Alone is good it helps you get a grip on what surrounds you with figuring why its better to sway away from partaking in
co-decencies....There is a more attractive things in people and its called "Independence"..To me thats more attractive then sweet nothings rambling in my ear...
2007-09-04 16:15:04 · answer #9 · answered by Contorted Brains 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've been "separated" for almost two years now ? Why aren't you divorced yet ? That may be the problem....no one really wants to be involved with someone who is still legally married and you shouldn't want to date anyone until you're legally divorced, anyway. Unless I'm misunderstanding you here...that's my guess. Try divorce first, then date. Maybe you'll have better luck after that.
2007-09-04 15:59:38 · answer #10 · answered by BRAT 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey, I'm old, fat and poor after a very expensive divorce. I do not expect to pair up again anytime soon.
But then again, I have been in that relationship since my late teens. I'm finally developing my own household, own rules, own cooking style (uncontrolled by a very picky eater, who preferred junk food anyway). So I am enjoying myself, in a quiet way.
I would like to have a partner - someone to work together with towards common goals, someone who can steady me when I stumble, and someone I can steady in turn.
Until that happens, I have family and friends for company. Not a bad thing, that.
2007-09-04 16:05:58 · answer #11 · answered by stenobrachius 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋