story of a friend:i met him 3 years ago, i was so lonely in Uk,?

Question

He has below average personality, short height and younger than me so no chances of any sort of relationship i needed a friend.he was a poet,good songs choice,perfect religious knowledge that what i wanted in a friend.i was a manager in chain store and he used to shop their.i am in late 20's and never had a boyfriend sort of thing and don't believe in love.he was a student in Britain.i came to uk 7 years ago and have MBA degree.we started exchang e.mails once or twice a month than phone.i was getting involved with him but always denied myself cos knew that no such thing love and care but wanted his attention and care all the time.he said once he is student need me to get married for his spouce visa, than he said do something for his new-muslim girl in karachi, one day i phoned him, he said i have done my Nikah and don't need you and i cried bitterly cos i was in habbit of sharing my views now after three years conversation i found he doesn't have feelings.

Answer 1

Hina, hina, HINA! Geeze hunnie we've got some self-esteem issues, AND an unhealthy view of love, no wonder you keep hurting yourself, tisk, tisk..... you sound intellegent to.,... well lets see what I can do for you here.

1. Love is an emotion, its job is to excite feelings. If you felt ANYTHING in your life, you loved, thats the nature of it. Also what makes love so special is all those INTENSE feelings, not so much the love, something people can't wrap there heads around....

2. Love isn't what you don't believe in, you don't believe in romantic love, which makes you pretty smart, its a fantasy, besides that TRUE love is better!

3. This gentlemen and your relationship with him is NOT a good indicator of men or relationships, so DON'T let this hurt you, I mean what do you expect? You sad he was below par!

4. Stop beating yourself up, I don't know what over, if its appeance, you think your stupid, your not rich enough, whatever it is, STOP it!!!! Also don't EVER compare yourself to your fellow people, we all have our own paths, so DON"T get mad if you don't get to follow everyone elses, hence the fact you've never been in a relationship....

5. CONCENTRATE!!! On making frineds, the problem with most of our cultures is that we don't give enough credit to how DARN important good quiality friendships are, there MORE important then romantic love, friends are true love, understand that....

6. Also like I tell everyone, concentrate on you to, take a step out of this mess we call western culture and educate yourself on its shortcomings and falsehoods, this is GREAT towards realizing there ISN'T any reason for you to feel bad about YOUR precepived shortcomings....